Windsor Tomcats

Any additional or missed players will be added to teams on the day of the event.

Play starts sharp at 6:00. Players bring their own shirts, $5 to play and pizza money for George.

Rest up boys it is going to be a test of skill, will and endurance!

See details here ->2012_Tomcat_outdoor_classic_roster_and_format

By Harry Ballsonue

White Knights: Razor, Junior, Hollywood, Chevy Lovie, Killer, Snowpants and Hurricane
Black Attack: Skippy, Rocky, Cribz, Yuri, Doc, Stevo, Spinner, Bulldog and May Day

White Knights win, 7-2, 7-5, 6-7.

Another glorious season came to a close at the Kapusta Kow Palace on Tuesday night, and the White Knights took it, with stellar goaltending from Razor and some nifty goal scoring from Chevy, who popped in 9 on the night. “I was lucky to have Hurricane on my side, he is a great teammate, line mate a mentor and a friend.  I think he set me up for all 9” a beaming Chevy had said.

Two weeks ago, Killer was the first star with 12 goals, and when he was asked if he scored many on the night he sated, “I got more assists tonight”. a very proud Killer had indicated.

One notable absence, for this week and last week, was Mez.  He never called to say he was not coming.  Tomcats looking into fining him for the two misses.

Other notables on the White Knights were Lovie with his wicked wrister that seemed to daze Skippy every time.

Doc, had another good night, notching a number of goals for the Black Attack.

The Tomcats partied on, with some homemade Kielbasa, brought by Yuri and the Tomcats. “The Tomcats really know how to end the year,with this nice spread.” stated Cribz who will be resting up for next year and has opted out of the out door game.

The out door game goes, next Tuesday at Lansberry Park and it is a 6 p.m. start, as the rink is rented from 6 to 8p.m.. Please, please be on time.

$10 for Pizza payable to Yuri.  $5.00 for hockey, payable to Bulldog.

After hockey everyone is welcome to celebrate the year end with the Tomcats at Dom Polski.

Tomcats announced today, that several players have been selected to submit Blogs to the web site through out the off season, with Razor getting the nod for the very first one.  They are to write about what ever they want….off season training, charity golf events, free agency, summer vacations and the upcoming season.  “I think this is a great idea”, stated The Rake, what better way to get to know the Tomcats, then by reading something that they wrote, I can’t wait to write mine”. The Rake Concluded.

The articles will appear on each and every Wednesday through out off season, and the specially selected Tomcats have been provided a date for their blog.  You really want to log on each and every Wednesday to check out each Tomcat Blogger.

Hockey and friendships start back up September 18

Hey, at the outdoor game, can I put my Harry Ballsonue?

Reading the recent St Felix, on the Tomcat Web Site,, I love when they show the old pictures of the Tomcats. Great publication, I just hope all Tomcats read it, next issue is not until the Summer. 

I had to smile seeing Bearcat as the Tomcat of the week, this week, particularly following his recent performance, this past Tuesday night.  Fans were treated to a rare appearance by Bearcat, who hasn’t had the opportunity to play very often during the season.  Probably like the common Grizzly bear, Bearcat came out of hibernation to lead the Black Attack to victory on the night.  The Black Attack dispatched the White Knights 2 games to 1 with score of 7-3, 4-7  and 7-4, and Bearcat showed no signs of ‘ring rust’ ending the night with an impressive 4.5 G.A.A.  Razor, played well, but,  ended with a 6 G.A.A, but it wasn’t only Bearcat who helped Razor look human…Harry had it right in giving a big nod towards Doc, scoring 2 seperate hat tricks.  Stars be damned on a ‘non’ mini tourny night – DOC WAS THE MAN!!  The White Knights  could only shake thier heads, not only watching Doc notch 6, but seeing last weeks scoring standout Killer be silenced.  “One week I’m being called Sid the Kid and this week a bum”, Killer had said.

When the first game was done fans had a good laugh watching Skippy playing out running around then collapsing onto the bench while asking Junior just exactly where he should play – the laugh was when Junior summed up the first game by simply stating, “In net where you belong”.   Skippy remained unfazed and actually scored in that first game, and considering the White Knights only scored 3 times.

Another interesting facet picked up on by Tomcat twitter followers is that in the 2 times Skippy has played out – each team he has played on lost their series.  SOOO, either the Skipster really is more of a ‘Spare’ to rest the superstars, or a bookies best pal.  Odds makers will be keenly watching what colour the lad wears the next time he’s gotta play out.  Tomcat standout, Lovie had this to say, “Hey boys, let’s get a big turnout for our last week of Tomcat Hockey, so Skippy can’t play out!”.

My selection for a nickname, for Stevo would be ‘Headband’, but seriously, will anyone call him anything but Stevo?  I know I use to hear Crispy call him Captain and I think Snowpants calls him that too and that would seem  appropriate.

A point of curiosity is that Razor, who won the Tomcat regular season NHL hockey pool, did not participate in the Tomcat NHL Playoff Pool….interesting to say the least.

With the season coming to an end, fans are very eager to get their fill of Tomcats hockey – cause one knows when the last goal in the season is scored and the Tomcats have cleaned out their lockers, I will shed a tear.  As I weep tears of memories of all this season has brought, I’ll need to be held and whisper – “Jingles, will you put Yuri HANDZONMECAC?”.

Yuri

By Harry Ballsonue

Black Attack: Bearcat, May Day, Rocky, Doc, Sparky, Lovie, Yuri, Spinner and Jingles
White Knights: Razor, Skippy, Killer, Junior, Hollywood, Stevo, Chevy, Cribz and La Bamba

The Black Attack take it, 7-3, 4-7 and 7-4.

Doc scores a hatrick in the Black Attacks first game and then scores a second hattrick in the Black Attack’s second game…the black attack win on the night, two game to one.  There is no three star selection, as there was no mini tournament, but Doc deserves mention for getting the Black Attack to where they ended up. “If it was not for his prowess in front of that net, who knows were we would be” Stated Rocky.

“I felt good out there tonight, this is now my second full year as a Tomcat and I have nothing but great things to say about the guys and the organization. I really had a lot of fun tonight” Doc said, with a smile from ear to ear.

Over all some very good hockey, with quick action, “when you have four spares, the play gets very quick out there, I know I notice it”, indicated an exacerbated Bearcat, who was stellar in between the pipes.

Next week, is the Tomcats last week and a mini tournament is expected.

Tomcats drafted their NHL Hockey Pool draft and from what I saw, some very good teams out there, waiting to see the names that Hollywood picks for each team.

Bulldog tells me, that he would like everyone to tell him if they are playing in the out door game, April 24. “If the guys could just email me, so I know how many we have, that would be good”, stated Bulldog.

And a reminder, please provide a suggested Nickname for Stevo, our fearless leader.  Respond to the posting from last week (April 5).  We want to take all submissions and put them to a vote to find Stevo a nickname befitting the leader of Tomcat Nation. 

Next week, if Kielbasa is bought for the stage after, would you mind if I but my Harry Ballsonue and your Harry Kielbasa ?

Harry Palm Press

With the return of the prodigal son “Stevo” fans and players alike arrived early for what would turn into a mini tournament, which as expected started with controversay.  The Turk was approached to be a Captain, quickly looked around and said, “No thanks”.  Having seen how mini’s have ruined some players mojo I had a hard time blamin the guy – Remember Skippy going 0-4?  All was figured out and in the grand scheme of things fans were treated to unusually good hockey a ll around.  Several first occurred, like Skippy finally winning (*).  That was later disputed by Hurrican e  , part of the White Knights who also were determined to be tourny winners.  The Falcon backstopped the White Knights posting 2 shutouts and ending with a record .5G.A.A.  That’s right .5!, earning the veteran the 2nd star nod on the night. When the dust settled both the White Knights and Yellow Fluffs were tied, throwin Hurricane into a spin.  “We didn’t get to play that last game with Black, I wanted to chase the plus minus – we could’ve done it”. 

The other first on the night was a 0-0 tie between the veteran Falcon and the Skipster, several Tomcats were later heard exclaiming, “That’s never happened before, good defense, good goaltending and good hockey”.  The game helped propel Skippy to his first ever mini tournament win with a 2.3G.A.A.  Fan favourite Razor was left twisting in the wind with a team that on paper looked hard to beat.  That team, the Black  Attack  featured dangerous players like the return of Stevo, Lovie, Jingles, May  D ay, Hollywood and Cribz.  In the end they went 0-3 and Razor posted a season high 5G.A.A.  Afterwards Razor remarked, “When it counts the Razor is there”.  As he was saying this he turned almost Matrix slow and showed off the collection of past stanley cup rings he’s already amassed.  Cribz may have summed it up best, “We just weren’t clickin, Stevo was out there just coming off the injury, I’m still a little banged up and was tentaive,  we could not make a pass to save our lives and the ball would bounce of some small object and land on the stick of our oppoment and they would score – A real twilight zone episode”. 

Not an easy task to pick teams, on paper sure you look great, but can everyone gel and fire on all cylinders?   In next years real tournament, the goalies pick, Skippy is already fretting, “Hey I have a real crap record with picking 0-4, but I think I’ll have a sweet team name!” .   Sources indicate the Skipster is already reviewing each Tuesday nights highlights, consulting the ouija board, opening thousands of chinese fortune cookies and amassing loads of booze for bribing the other goalies – Time, picks and Vegas stats will eventually provide an outlook on whatever those teams picked odds will look like and wages will be spent chasing the elusive question of whether anyone can knock off the returning champs.  Speaking of champs, first star on the night Killer really lit it up, scoring from almost every angle on the floor.  I think he even got an assist while trying to make a line change – When your on fire – YOUR ON FIRE!  I slid in close to the reclusive superstar and as he was packing up all his gear whispered, “Will you put Yuri HANDZONMECAC?”

YURI

As proud and dedicated Tomcats, we have all been asigned some of the greatest sports nicknames of all time.  Hollywood, Rake, Snowpants, Hurricane to name a few.  While looking at our roster, it became very evident that the most important Tomcat of all has the weakest nickname.  Stevo.  I mean come on!!  Stevo from Steve…are you friggin’ kidding me right now??!!  If anyone deserves a cool nickname, it is our loyal, dedicated, fearless leader. 

So here is what I propose we do:  Each and every Tomcat who feels the same way about Stevo that I do, please submit the coolest nickname ever for him.  The winner of this contest gets a new hat, courtesy of the Razor. 

I’ll get the ball hockey ball rolling by submitting my suggestion right now: SNAKEBITE!.

Send your selection into the Tomcat website.  If we have enough entries by next week, I will print off all submissions and we can vote for the best-of-the-best next Tuesday at ball hockey in true democratic Tomcat fashion.  Let’s give Stevo a new handle.  One befitting his true stature in Tomcat lore!!

This is Jacques Strapp signing off.

By Harry Ballsonue

“Started Late and Finished Early”, sounds like a sexual encounter I had recently, but what it really was, was a late start getting going for the Mini Tournament and then the Black Attack (who had no attack at all) did not play the last game, leaving the Mini Tournament in Limbo with a very frustrated team Captain of the White Knights,  Hurricane. “What is up with that, (Black Attack not wanting to play)” Hurricane asked, “First my prodigy Chevy does not show up, after I had picked him and now we can’t beat black by 5 goals and win this Mini”. Hurricane stated, all red faced.

Both the Yellow Jackets and the White Knights ended up tying in the Mini…a first time occurrence.

The three stars on the night, as selected by La Bamba:  3) Crow, 2) Falcon 1) Killer.

“I thought Killer had a stellar performance out there, he was way better than Crow, Sunny and Lovie all put together”, stated May Day.

Killer, brought 12 MGD, scored 9 goals, had 8 assists and was the first star.

Only two weeks remain in the 2011-2012 season, April 10 and April 17 and then the Out Door Classic being hosted by Bulldog. 6 PM start on that day, as the facility is only rented to 8pm.

June 22 is the golf outing. It looks like the Golf Committee will be able to buy beer from the Tomcats for the Golf tournament, so the price will be $50 for golf, $10.00 for food (Slovakii night in Canada) and $6-7 bucks for beer and Rye.  “We will have beer left over from the Tomcats and will buy the left over beer for the golf tournament, so guys can just pay me for that and then they don’t have to bring anything”. An excited Snowpants had said and then added, “We are trying to get back on Seven Lakes and I am disguising my voice and using a different name when I am talking to them, so far it seems to be working.” Snowpants concluded.

Next week, the Tomcats will be holding their NHL Play Off Pool, cost is $11.00.  Come prepared. (Stevo, don’t pick any Leafs!!!) And Speaking of Hockey Pools, the only race in the regular season pool, will be for either second or third.  Right now Zabba holds 2^nd by 13 points and Crow holds third by 12. Sparky and Hurricane are both hoping for strong finishes to sneak into third.

During the ‘Picking’, in the Playoff Pool, can I put my Harry Ballsonue?

Click here to read the latest Saint Felix.

by Harry Ballsonue

What does it take to be a Tomcat, sure you should like drinking icy cold beer and you should like wearing Tomcat t-shirts, touques, jackets and sweat shirts…but what else? You must endure the odour of the Falcon’s hockey bag.  You must put up with the Mini Tournament and you must watch for errant hockey sticks. In the March 27 games, Cribz took a stick off his beak and the result was Sparky saying, “Mikey, you killed Kenny”.  Cribz will be all right and is expected to dress for the April 3 games, “I feel fine, the nose is sensitive and I don’t see why I would not be able to play on Tuesday” Cribz had indicated from his Lakefront home.

Cribz sporting the look of a Raccoon, will be in the lineup April 3

Looking back at recent injuries, Sparky took a few stitches in a game to his lower lip (still has a scar) but was back at Purples for a beer, after being stitched up at the Hospital, The Mayor before that, lost a tooth and now Cribz….no stitches and luckily no loss of a tooth or an eye, but everyone must be reminded to be very aware of their stick and who is around you. “we don’t want to see anyone get hurt”, stated Sub Committee member, Jingles and added, “we all have jobs to go to on Wednesday morning”.

IN OTHER NEWS…   

Looks like Stevo has been cleared for running on wooden floors and should be good to go April 3.  The Rake is convalescing from shoulder surgery and is out for the season as is Youngblood who is nursing a groin pull. “It has been a frustrating year for me, I want to be out there playing and hanging out with the guys, but for now I must work on my groin and take care of business there”. a sad Youngblood had said.

The May 2012 St. Felix will be out in the first few days of April and I can tell you, I have scanned it and you do not want to miss it!

In the mean time, whilst you are laying on the bed in the first aid room, let me put my Harry Ballsounue!

As I sit high up here in the press box, first time by the way! I look up up to and respect all the writers who have sat here before me (who, fortunately for me, are following Snowpants around, after the excitement and buzz with the latest Escort Service announcement)!  A huge congratulations to Snowpants, and the industry, word is he was busy, looking for several mansions to house his new places of business. 

Black Al Sharptons: Razor, Cribz, Husky Eyes (aka Sunny), Shovey, Hurricane and Bulldog.
White Vanilla Ice: Falcon, Turk, Mez, Sparky, Hollywood and Spinner.

The scores on the evening, the Al Sharptons victorious 7-3, 7-3, 1-2 ! Good hard fought hockey, by these guys, which roster wise, in the morning skate was rumoured to be three substitutes a side.  That dropped off toward opening face off to just one sub a side!  The elder Jablonsky brother who has stepped aside (whilst he is on the mend) for his younger brother to run things, wanted to pull the plug as soon as the second cancellation came in.  At one point all eyes were on the locker room door waiting for Shamus to come in!

But the night went on, and the games were played! A lot of nice razzle dazzle style passes by both sides.  Bulldog pulled out some fancy moves scoring on several breakaway opportunities!  Razor was solid in between the pipes, razor sharp in fact.  Catching, blocking, kicking away almost everything the Vanilla Ice squad threw at him.

Meanwhile on the other side of the arena, Falcon was so busy, people were saying by the end of the night, he was going to be skinnier than the Hurricane!  Sparkmeister stood on solid ground, with his all round hockey skills, also with his beer to ice ratio, in the cooler!

Hollywood has a second sample of Tomcat DNA on his stick when Cribz walked, no ran into his stick on a follow through.  Cribz was knocked to the ground, blood everywhere, got up mumbling something about police brutality!  Who knows? 

All the fans got a treat, witnessing the Mez, and his trademark lacrosse style pass, from the corner, eye level right in front of the net.  The pass was to Spinner, who said” if I jumped up, and knocked it down, I am sure I would have scored”!

Bulldog also was heard at the end of the night frantically looking for the outdoor classic trophy “Its a guy, like a stickman, made of metal, on a ball, has anyone seen it”!  He was also looking to put a photo of the trophy, on theside of a milk carton, who knows?  Maybe on a breakfast table near you!

Hopefully maybe one day I can contribute an article again on these fine specimens of men and hockey players!

Until then, this is Phil Landerer, saying gentlemen, hold on to your girlfriends and wives

Fellow Tomcats,

Our esteemed net-minder, The Falcon, is concerned that the remaining warm nights of hockey may lead to injuries and has suggested a circuit of yoga excercies to perform before each Tuesday night game.  To make it easy to follow, The Falcon has enlisted the help of a close friend to demonstrate each move that should be followed.  See here:

http://www.totalprosports.com/2011/11/23/jordan-carver-yoga-gallery/jordan-carver-yoga-18/?utm_source=wahoha.com&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=wahoha