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All posts for the month February, 2013
With the annual tourny, despite the recent blog by President Stevo, I saw several colours – mostly red; as in anger directed by some players at others. It actually lead to a penalty being called (which is not rare), in a tourny, and ‘dust up’, which use to occur once in a while, but has not been seen in a few years. These colours were added to the long sleeved Tomcats SWAG – A BRIGHT ORANGE LONG SLEEVED SWEATSHIRT? Upon seeing the shirt Chevy remarked, “Wow, for Halloween we can all now be Tomcat players,” followed by Snowpants’ remark of “Shit, I haven’t seen so many city workers standing around looking at one another in quite some time.”
Hi-jinks, penalties, sweet goals, saves and jokes aside, when the dust settled the Chevy Sharks took the ever so sweet sip from Stanley’s cup. Prior to the sip they had to first finish off the pesky defending champs Mauraders. The final game ended 4-1 (2-1 with 2 empty-netters to boot). What really surprised critics and bookies alike was that the Chevy Sharks featured first time Stanley Cup virgin sippers Beep, Doc and Chico; all three new players to the Tomcats fold, along with Snowpants’ first ring, and all can now add “Champions” to their resumes.
My predictions were mostly bang on, but I, along with Cribzie were puzzled at his 0-2-1 record. Cribzie would later comment, “We were right there with all the teams, only losing the games in the last 20-30 seconds. Even Skippy played well above what was expected, but we needed a big save from him at times and that never happened.”
For the record team stats went as follows:
CHEVY SHARKS (CHAMPS) 3-0-0, 13GF, 6GA, +7, 6PTS
HOLLYWOOD HOOKS 0-2-1, 15GF, 19GA, -4, 1PT
MAYDAY MAURADERS 2-1-0, 14GF, 14GA, 0, 4PTS
CRIBZIES CROWN ROYALS 0-2-1, 12GF, 15GA, -3, 1PT
CHAMPIONSHIP GAME – SHARKS 4 – MAURADERS 1
MVP, as selected by LaBamba went to Rocky, who collected some sweet prizes, along with another championship ring. And while there usually isn’t any other “stars” selected, such as a second and third star; my choice would go to Crow and Falcon respectively. Special mention goes to Beep for providing all the boys with a new long sleeved Black shirt. Junior commented, “Grr, ok it was nice of him, even if I’m sportin’ his work logo.”
With the end of the tourny, management reminds players there is NO HOCKEY this coming Tuesday.
Other news is the recent announcement by Skippy that this would be his last game until the beginning of April due to the any day expectant arrival of the little Skipster. For those left in the pool – STAY TUNED!!
For photos and more ‘takes’ on the Tournament, check out the April St. Felix. due out in a few days.
Until the ball drops again, Doc, since you looked like you needed a hug out there, Yurri HANDZONMECAC.
Yurri
I guess, if I knew, that no one would get hurt on Saturday or that no one would go crazy (me included) I would not write this bog, I would never ask that it be posted……but then again, I have no idea who will read this blog in the first place. Probably, knowing what we know, only the guys who would not be involved in pushing, shoving, altercations and heavy stick work, will read it, so why write it? Good question. I have always said, ‘Communication is the International Solvent’.
So….please know, that I want a clean, fun packed tournament. With lots of pretty goals, great passing and some ‘Flashes the Leather’ Glove saves.
The Refs, for Saturday have been instructed to whistle down any rough play. If two are pushing then the whistle will blow and there will be a face off at center. If one player is an aggressor, then penalties will be called. Misconducts will be given and if it continues, players will be ejected.
Once again, for the 23rd year in a row, I will state, ‘this tournament is for fun, there will be NO NHL CONTRACTS awarded to anyone after the tournament is over’. I guarantee it.
Try to win…..for sure! Play your best, smile nice for the camera in the team picture and then enjoy a beer on stage with your fellow Tomcat Brother.
Knute Rockne once said, “ One man practicing sportsmanship is far better than one hundred teaching it”.
Remember the guy you hack on the Kapusta Kow floor, may be the guy you are having a beer with after.
Good luck to everyone on Saturday, TOMCATS FOREVER!
The President,
Windsor Tomcats
By Harry Ballsonue
Never has there been a closer mini tournament. Yuri, with his Hands on His Cock, was not there, so he cannot dispute my math, so here are the standings:
W L: T GF GA +/- Pts.
The White Rabbits 2 2 0 11 9 +2 4
The Yellow Chicken Hawks 2 2 0 9 8 +1 4
The Black Buzzards 2 2 0 8 9 -1 4
Rake Rabbits, lead by the Rake and then there were Beep, Matador, Spinner, Snowpants, and the Falcon
Mez Chicken Hawks, lead by the Mez and then there were Sunny, Rocky, La Bamba, Razor, Chevy and the Turk
Doc’s Buzzards, lead by the Doc and then there were Soupy, Lovie, Stevo, Hollywood and Chico
The Three Star Selection, as selected by La Bamba: 3rd Star, Snowpants, the second star, Chico and the First star, Lovie.
“I do not recall, ever, games being so close” indicated a exuberant Rake, who drafted the winning team. “Pinch me, I can’t believe we won tonight, by such a slim margin. Fuck off to all those doubters, in my previous years of drafting, tonight I picked a winning team and we won.” The Rake indicated and then skipped off towards the beer cooler.
A big thank you goes out to the refs , the Bundura and the Sea lion. The Sea lion, pulls a super solid and brings a case of Budweiser for the tournament, tell me, he won’t win the MVP Award.
The refs did a great job, and now are in the groove for Saturday.
Lovie who was the first star over all, showed why he is considered a franchise player, rifling in a couple of dandies.
Snowpants seemed to be all over the floor today, knocking balls in, intercepting the passes and just being like the energizer bunny. “I just felt good out there today, I hope this continues for me into Saturday’s tournament,” Snowpants had indicated.
I was told that some fans spotted several of the Tomcats making their way to Purples and autograph hounds were there asking for Soupy’s, La Bamba’s and Doc’s autographs. Soupy pulls a solid at Purples, I am told and buys the first round…..that is the Tomcat Spirit.
All three teams with 4 points and one goal differential to set the winner. Mark this one down in our calendar, as you will not see this kind of parity every week.
This Saturday, the tournament starts at 8:30. Cost is $20 for tournament and $10 for Pizza, at Purples for 3 pm.
Rumour has is that a new colour will be unveiled on Saturday for the long sleeve Tomcat shirt. “I really hope the guys like the shirt,” indicated a nervous Stevo. “I think it will look great with jeans,” he further added. The full Tomcat team picture will be taken, after the first two games are played.
Don’t forget, beer is supplied by the Tomcats this Saturday. Please have a D.D. arranged.
When you are cracking open your 5th beer, and the awards ceremony is done with, and you are just chill-axing, do you mind if I put my Harry Ballsonue?
Beer Bringers: Chevy (24) Cribz (12)
Net Minders: Razor, Falcon, Chico
In The LIne Up: Crow, The Rake, Rocky, Cribzie, The Turk, Doc, Chevy, Stevo, Spinner, Bulldog, Jingles, Lovie, Sunny, Beep, Soupy, Snowpants, Hurricane, May Day, Zabba, La Bamba, The Matador, Hollywood
On Injured Reserve: Youngblood
Not In The Line Up: Skippy, Sparky, Killer, Flintstone, Junior.
Captains: To Be Determined
Refs: The Bundura and The Sea Lion
The Skinny: With less then a week remaining before the tournament, looks like 24 players are ready to play, so it is Mini Tournament Time. Tournament Refs are being brought in, ‘to get a feel for the game’ and Chico gets the nod in net, in case Skippy is unable to make it, due to the birth of his child.
Doc’s party is still set for March 2 and invitations have been handed out. Anyone needing an invite is asked to see Stevo.
IF you know at this very moment you are not able to play, why not get a hold of Stevo right now, instead of waiting till Tuesday at 5p.m.
Tomcats Forever.
Word has already reached procrastinating fans that there are no tickets left to the upcoming annual Tomcats Tournament. Fans who have secured the standing only stubs have reportedly already been seen in the Kapusta Kow parking lot looking to select the best place to squat and secure the elusive ‘best’ seat.
Sources have also heard that as of February 15th Mrs. Skippy has reached full term. Further information has been gathered in which the gynocologist was overheard saying, “Theoretically I’d have my bags ready because after Friday you could go anytime.”
This information was shared with Spinner via the Tomcats 24hour player web cast, and he commented, “Well, I guess if Skippy missed the tourny; or worst yet had to run out on the tourny the Tomcats would forgive him – I would only find it hard to do the same if we were winning to the point he had to leave. It will be a real tough spot too for Chico to have to come in like that; I hope the best for Mrs. Skippy – but do us all a favour and wait till after the tourny.”
With the date closing in, now is the time to update fans and participants alike in the Skippy birth pool; which was graciously run on behalf of the couple by Snowpants. Mrs Skippy later stated, ” I was really touched by the support of the Tomcats family, what a great group of guys!” “I can’t thank Snowpants enough for helping us out, hence he will soon be introduced to our little one as Uncle Snowpants.”
The pool in a small snapshot looks as follows:
February 17th – Nicole at 0600-noon
18th – Yuri at Midnight-6AM
19th – Carrie at Noon-6PM
20th – Mez at Midnight-6AM
21st -Rake at Midnight-6AM
22nd – Stevo at Midnight-6AM and Grace C at 6AM-Noon
23rd – Matt at 6PM-Midnight
A weekly update will be sent after the 23rd – Good luck to all involved!! And until after the tourny I’m sure I can convince Cribz to put his HANDZONMECAC.
Yuri
That Harry, he’s exceptionally quick at getting out the results from recent Tomcats games; which undoubtedly keep the Tomcats fans happy as is evidenced by the web site stats (Closing in on 20000!!). But you know who is even quicker – BEEP!! Just like in the classic Bugs Bunny Road Runner shows of old, all poor old Wile E Coyote; and the remainder of The Leopards team who Beeps squad played first, could only watch as 15 seconds into the game – BEEP SCORES!!!!
I do believe this is a Tomcats record, and The Matador indeed as a first time mini tournament Captain made an excellent choice in the rising superstar.
Harry has laid it out for teams and stats, but I do dispute the numbers. While I had the same win/lose, tie and final points, I had The Bulls and Leopards even at Goals for and against. By my count each team was 10GF and 7GA with the identical records of 2-1-1; but as The Bulls beat the Leopards in the very first game 4-2, they ended up as tournament winners. Soupy of the Leopards later lamented, “Man, that’s just wrong, ‘cause The Mustangs beat the Bulls and we crushed the Mustangs with a shut out – guess that first game really played a significant factor in the end”.
One of the three stars on the night went to Hollywood, who filled in at goalie and truly showed he still has the stuff. In the past I had noted this as well and still stick to my position as Hollywood being one of the best three way players in the game today; forward, defense or goal; Hollywood is sure bet to get it done.
As Falcon did get the only shut out on the night critics will argue he was a good selection at the number two spot, but I think Stevo was snubbed even despite his minor missteps, which included catching a goalie and using him AKA Snowpants style to sweep the floors, the ‘hack?’ on a goalie behind the net, or the “accidental” stick throw, Stevo as usual was a factor in most of the games The Mustangs played. He was definitely a factor on the goal sheet when Beep on a very rare giveaway allowed Stevo a shot from the deadly slot area, beating poor Skippy once again and showing he still indeed has the “stuff”. Later Stevo would comment on the night’s events, “I may have let my emotions get away from me and it has cost me some beer; but my passion for the game and Tomcats players is unquestioned. I just hope with what I saw out there tonight the boys will remember to play the ball, and just have fun”.
Sources have heard The Biebs has become a Tomcats web surfer and in turn has been carefully reviewing news updates. Apparently he recently tweeted, “Ok, I apologized for the tournament, but it’s real good to see some of the Tomcats players might have been a problem too”.
One thing is for certain…with the tournament a mere week away I predict several Tomcats will be missing this upcoming Tuesday’s game. Speculation is that players missing will be keenly preparing for the tourny, and I know I certainly wouldn’t want to be reffing what is bound to be a very tightly contested matchup this year. As I try to hack into the Tomcats satellite feed in preparation for the tourny, I will be Pattyn MEGROYN.
Pattyn
By Harry Ballsonue
Some pushing and shoving, Tomcat Tournament organizers are suggesting everyone read the rules, in preparation for the tournament, including the refs!
Did you know that legendary goalie Jacques Plante loved to knit! And that NHL overtime was eliminated during WWII, because there were restrictions on train travel, so they couldn’t risk going long and missing the one and only train that night. It was only reinstated in 1983-84 and that the great Howie Morenz was rumoured to have died of a broken heart after being told he would never play hockey again. Did you know that the Hurricane has played goalie at least once a year for the Tomcats for 22 years? Did you also know that next year (2013-14) season will the Tomcats 25th (2 as basketball and 23 as hockey)?
Teams:
The Matador Bulls; Captain, The Matador with, Beep, Snowpants, Sparky, Cribz, Skippy, Chico
The LaBamba Leopards: Captain, LaBamba with, Soupy, Spinner, Chevy, Falcon. Rake, Doc
The May Day Mustangs: Captain, May Day with Stevo, Flintstone, Jingles, The Turk, Hollywood
Standings: W L T GF GA +/- Pts.
The Bulls 2 1 1 9 5 +4 5
The Leopards 2 1 1 10 7 +3 5
The Mustangs 1 3 0 6 12 -6 2
This was the Matador’s first time as a Captain, in a mini and congrats goes out to him and his team for finishing first in the tournament.
THE MATADOR TELLS A STORY:
“When I was younger and still a Matador in my native land of Spain, it was a custom that we, the Matadors would, on the Monday after the Bull fights on Sunday, for lunch, eat the bulls’ testicles. One day, we were at the outdoor cafe in Madrid, ready to chow down, when I noticed that the testicles were a lot smaller…they still tasted good, but they were smaller. I said to the waiter, ‘my friend, the testicles are smaller today.’ He replied, ” Yes Senior Matador…..not every time, does the Matador, win the bull fight.”
Back to hockey:
In frustration with the referring, Stevo wheeled his stick, and that will cost him a 24. To be paid on the first night of hockey next year. “It was not just the reffing” a frustrated Stevo had said after the game, “I think I do so much for the game and someone yells at me ‘slap shot’, when I took a shot and it was not even close to being a slap shot, c’mon, that hurts, why do they yell that?”, Stevo concluded.
This reporter has been able to find out that, Crow is upset at himself for letting himself get so out of shape, he hopes to be able to play in the tournament, but does not know at what level.
The three star selection, as selected by La Bamba, # 3 Hollywood, #2, Falcon, # 1 Beep.
Hollywood defiantly faced more shots than any other goalie on the night, but just did not seem to be able to make the 5th and 6th saves. In the NHL the goalie is expected to only make the first save.
Reffing came into question and I have learned through the league, that tournament referee, the Bundura, has been asked on 7 different occasions to come out to ref a Tuesday night, just to get a feel, but has not made an appearance to date.
Cribzie, head referee is asking that anyone who steps up to ref, not just go out there to blow the whistle once in a while, but to actually get engaged and take charge of the play and blow the whistle when it needs to be blown and make a call when a call needs to be made.
Invitations have been handed out to Doc and Jodi’s party. “I can’t wait for the foor”, the Turk indicated, I will go, just to see what that is all about.
Speaking of being blown, do you think on Thursday, Valentine’s Day, I can put my Harry Ballsonue?
Beer Bringers: Spinner (24) The Turk 12
Net Minders: Razor, The Falcon, Skippy
In The Line Up: The Rake, Sparky, Junior, Cribzie, The Turk, Hollywood, La Bamba, May Day, Lovie, Doc, Chevy, Stevo, Spinner, Bulldog, Jingles, Sunny, Mez, Killer, Snowpants, The Matador, Beep, Chico
Could be in the lineup, so he can hone his skills for tournament, just needs one guy to cancel: Flintstone
Not in Line Up: Crow, Rocky, Hurricane (in Aruba), Zchabba
Injured Reserve: Youngblood
Listed ‘Day to Day’: Soupy
On Honeymoon: Crazy Joe
Skinny: The Turk is bringing a 12, so get ready for IPA, Black Label, Red Cap or 50.
Free Beer: Don’t forget the Tomcats are providing the beer on Tournament Day.
Doc’s Party: Doc’s House Warming Party is Saturday March 2, get details from Doc re address and the start time.
Tomcats will be reviewing the Skip Jacks – Tomcat game and will be determining if they should be returning to the hooliganism that was displayed at the Skip Jack Stadium on January 27 of this year.
Tournament Reminder: Tournament is on Saturday February 23, and it starts at 8:30 a.m. Beer provided, but the cost is $20 for tournament, $10 for pizza and $$$ whatever your cost is for your individual team shirt. Let the Pizza Man, May Day know this Tuesday if you will be participating in the Pizza back at Purples.
And hey!!! If you know right now that you can’t make it this Tuesday, then let Stevo know now, instead of 5 p.m. Tuesday.
By Harry Ballsonue
In the 2010 Vancouver Games, (Olympics), did you know that 26.5 million Canadians, or 80 percent of the country’s population tuned in to watch the gold-medal game in men’s hockey. Slightly fewer at the Kapusta Kow on Tuesday night, but still a packed house, with one team with 3 spares and the other two with two spares.
The Canaries: Captained by Soupy, The rest of the team….Sunny, Rocky, Bulldog, Hurricane, Sparky, Hollywood
The White Doves: Captained by Chevy, The Rest of the team….LaBamba, Razor, the Turk, Jingles, Doc, the Rake, Killer
The Black Crows: Captained by Spinner, The rest of the team…. Beep, the Matador, Stevo, Snowpants, Falcon and Mez
Final Standings: W L T +/- Pts.
Canaries 3 1 0 +3 6
Crows 2 2 0 +2 4
Doves 1 3 0 -5 2
The hockey was very good and the pace was fast. Things ran smoothly, with one exception…Ref Stevo counted a goal against the Canaries, when Jingles had scored. “The goalie, was turned around and fixing the net, I thought that is a nice kid, that goalie, if the net remains off, a goal won’t count. But the goalie was still turned around. He (the goalie) put the net in place and the other team shot and scored. If he had just pushed it off further or left the net where it was, the play would have been called dead,” Ref Stevo had said.
Then as the second period was about to begin, the goalie, being silly, moved the net over and would not start the game in the correct spot, after a warning, the Canaries got called for a delay of game. But in the end, it was the Canaries who took the tournament.
The Three star selection as selected by La Bamba, #3 Spinner, #2 Soupy and the number one star on the night, Sunny.
Speaking of Soupy, poor guy, had his knee buckle on him and he went down….after some medical treatment (ice pack) and an MRI (stood close to the score clock), he was back in the line-up for the next game. He hobbled, he hopped, he trotted, but you could see that the knee was still giving him some trouble. “We will monitor the situation and we’ll see how he will be tomorrow,” stated team doctors.
The Tomcats would also like to announce, free beer at the tournament. “We have about 7 cases right now,” stated Sparky and added, “so instead of having everyone bring beer (they still can if they want to), we’ll throw 3-4 cases on ice so that everyone can enjoy them,” Sparky concluded.
Doc and the Matador, the Ministers of Beverages and Ice, will take care of that on the day (see St. Felix for all portfolio’s and duties).
Quick reminder, that the St. Felix does come out every month and that EVERYONE is encouraged to read it. Special Agent Beep, has been assigned the task of reviewing The Windsor Tomcat internal communication policy to see how they can get everyone to always check the site and the St. Felix. There was a ‘situation’ last week, where an email was sent out to specific parties and the website blog, “What the Tomcats Know” also indicated that Stevo would not be around last week to field any cancellations. Well, sure as shit, Sunday night when he checked his phone, there was a cancellation on there…..
“We really don’t know what more we can do at this time”, indicated Windsor Tomcat Captain Rocky, “The web site is visited, but we need more to read the content and stay on top of the information being provided,” Rocky had said.
Only cancellation for next week, that we know of, is Crow, so if you cannot make it, let Stevo know. In the meantime, do you think, while you are enjoying your free Tomcat beer at the tournament, I can put my Harry Ballsonue?
In Charge; Steve-O
Welcome Back Kotter, ummm I mean Steve-O!
Beer Bringers;Lovie (24), Sparky (12)
Team Captains; Spinner, Chevy, Soupy
Net Minders; Razor, Falcon, and not Skippy (third goalie TBD)
In The Tomcat Lineup; Rocky, Sparky, Junior, MayDay, Hollywood, La Bamba, Steve-O, Rake, Zhabba, Beep, Sunny, Lovie,
Cribs, Doc, SnowPants, Matador, Bulldog, Killer, Hurricane, The Turk, Mez, Jingles.
Not In The Tomcat Line Up; Willie (Fred Flintstone)
Injured reserve; Youngblood
Skinny; Steve-O’s back looks like a mini for sure. If you cannot make it, be sure to make Steve-O or Hollywood aware,!
Text, email, phonecall, passenger pigeon, whatever!
Notable Notes; Doc fined a six pack for goalie slash! Matador was to bring his initiation case last week, but he totally forgot! He was gracious enough to want to run out and grab it.
Management insisted he just stick with his fine. The Rake was to provide a half box for Tuesday, called in not going to be there from the Tilston Cup game,
did not make beer arrangements (should be a fine)! Sparky scored a “Rake” like goal (on your own net), last Tues! Long clearing shot from defence on opposing team. Sparky stuck his foot out to kick the ball,
it deflected off of his foot, and past his own goalie, Skippy. Snow pants did one better, He could not figure out why he was all alone in front of the net? Uncovered, nobody around for twenty feet? Gets the ball, does a Denis Savard half spinorama,
blasts one, right past Razor, triumphantly! His own goalie!
Tomcats Forever