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All posts for the month January, 2014
By Harry Ballsonue
Teams were fair and the games were close, great job Cribzie we love you most!!!
Skippy’s Southside Scoundrels: Skippy, Rocky, Cribzie, Chevy, Tunes, Sheepdog and Kamikaze
Falcon’s Fabulous Few: Falcon, Sparky, Stevo, Hurricane, Lovie, Killer, Soupy and Spanky
Hollywood’s Happy Ho’s: Hollywood, Chico, Sunny, Matador, Snowpants, Doc and Flintstone
The Southside Scoundrels took the mini, with some solid play by the defensive duo of Cribzie and Rocky, playing together for the first time in 6 years, “We never get to play together, it was really good to play on D with him….” Indicated Cribzie the creator of all three teams.
“I think he did a fantastic job,” stated Soupy, and added, “I felt all three teams were equal and anyone could have won the tournament, if only we got some shots on net against the Scoundrels,” indicated Soupy.
The three star selection as selected by La Bamba, 3rd star, # 28 Kamakaze second star, # 20 Sheep Dog and the first star # 73 Doc.
“What an honour, I know I notched a few goals tonight and made a difference out there, but to be selected first star, well…wow, I don’t know what to say, except for, I wish Crow (Mr. Beatle) was here to see me score the goals I scored, and to see me as first star,” indicated a beaming Doc.
Second Star, a first time Star, Sheep Dog, “What can I say, I get this Tomcat jacket and then my wife buys me a sporty hat, now look at me, second star, women are approaching me from all sides, I love being a Tomcat,” an almost weeping Sheep Dog indicated.
Solid move goes to Hollywood who brought in a ton of kielbasa and cheese and crackers, well done, the boys munched on the food on stage and had a grand old time.
Stevo announced that he is organizing his last clothing item for the Tomcats as President, a Black Tomcat sweat shirt, with a Silver stitch, “If you want one, let me know…if you don’t I understand…if I order 2, if I order 45, it makes no ‘never minds’ to me,” a jubilant Stevo had indicated.
Speaking of Stevo, for a man who was on the IR for 9 weeks, his return was pretty darn good. He notched a few goals and set up some of his teammates, “I am just so happy that I did not reinjure it, The February 22 tournament means a great deal to me and I am glad that I can play in it, noting my knee problem,” Stevo had indicated.
Next week, the three show case players are playing and it looks like another mini….
ONE POINT THAT I WAS ASKED TO MAKE IS: Tomcats ARE NOT providing beer this year at the Tournament, so please bring beer that you plan to consume on stage, don’t be mooching off others.
A solid was once again done by Lovie who brought a 24 of Rolling Rock for no reason at all, except that he is a great guy and I was interviewing Stevo, new comer, Spanky walked by, said his good byes to Stevo and said, “Make sure you place my name on the beer list, I want to do my part in contributing beer.” God I want to be a Tomcat. What a super thing to do by Spanky….
Back at Purples, several of the Tomcats were there, Lovie, Sheep Dog, Hollywood Stevo and Chico, as the clinked their glasses, Sheep Dog said ‘Tomcats Forever’….which means, You gotta sing the Tomcat Song, which they did, with Hollywood doing a solo as the other four sang back ground….”I am just trying to learn the song,” indicated an excited Sheep Dog, “I will practice it at home, and I will know it for the next time it is belted out,” he added.
Whilst the boys are picking out another beer from the cooler, on stage, could I put my Harry Ballsonue…
Die hard fans and players alike are undoubtedly looking forward to the upcoming annual ‘Stanley’s Cup Tournament’, and from what has been seen in terms of play recently at Tuesday night affairs; players have definately ramped up thier efforts.
Quiet rumours are also being heard which may significantly alter the teams which have already been selected. Unconfirmed sources have whispered long time Tomcats such as Bubbles and Cribz are quietly nursing injuries. One specific rumour has it that Jingles, a team Captain is also still on the I.R. When I questioned some of the players drafted to the Jingles Jets, they were quick to state, “If Jingles goes down, our team may be hard pressed to compete.”
The absolute most shocking statement came from a long time Tomcat superstar; who requested for now his identity remain secret: “This will likely be my last season.” WOW! What a shocker that will be when the player feels ready to make a media announcement; which I suspect may come after the outdoor tourny.
Having been sworn to secrecy I will protect the player in question, but it did cause me to review the Tomcat roster to ascertain a median age. What I came to was a mediam age of 41. I also began to review the teams selected for the tourny, and as in year’s past I am ready to make my predictions.
True fans of my work may recall my prediction made last year, as seen in the article ‘Predictions, Contemplations, and a Monkey?’ (Jan 30, 2013); along with the article ‘Tomcats – A Rainbow of Colours’ (Feb 24, 2013). To recap, I predicted the Cribz Crown Royals or Hollywood Hookers would join the Chevy Sharks in the final game. We all know the Sharks took it, and while I don’t recall picking a clear winner, I did predict the Sharks making the big show. I further correctly predicted that the Mauraders would not repeat as champs; and Beep would be selected first overall.
My predictions this tourny: Snowpants Black Jacks will make it to the final game, along with Lovie’s Legion of Doom. It is really hard to predict which team will take it all, as both are very well matched on paper; but I think the over-under favours Snowpants tasting his second cup win.
Maybe, just maybe my comments will fire up either Stevo’s Stingrays or Jingles Jets to put a monkey wrench into the whole plan. Either way, all eyes will be on the big game and time will tell who will be able to claim the cup.
Yurri
To say this week’s hockey had a storybook ending might be stretching it a bit, but hey, I am trying to stay with this silly fairytale theme for this article…
Captains were chosen my those brave men who have been in the Sherwood Forest the longest…The Turk, Bulldog and Hurricane. Their teams of merry men included:
George’s Grumpy Gang (wearing Green) – Sunny, Jingles, Kamikaze, Doc, LaBamba and Hollywood (G) (Note: Grumpy was given as George refused to pick a team, so Hollywood made the selections on his behalf)
Bulldog’s Bashful Bunch (wearing Black) – Falcon (G), Tunes, Sparky, Cribz, Sheepdog and Spanky (who never showed)
Hurricane’s Happy Heros (wearing White) – Soupy, Rake, Mattador (G), Chevy, Rocky, Snowpants
Games started a little late but breaks between periods and games were kept to one minute. The pace was quick as the Tomcats get closer to tournament time. All goalies played very well, leading to very low scoring games. White and Black were tied coming into the final game. In the end, Hurricane’s Happy Heros proved to be too much, taking the winner 2-0.
Final results:
Hurricane’s – 3-0-1
Bulldog’s – 2-1-1
George’s – 0-4-0
When some Tomcats discussed the merits of playing forward or defense, a quote was heard from one very wise Tomcat (probably the wisest of them all, just ask him – The Rake)…”Forwards make commercials, Defensemen make History!”
The 3 Star selection, as selected by King LaBamba The Great, The Fifth, Esquire:
Third Star – Falcon
Second Star – Matador
First Star – Snowpants
Reporting from FantasyLand, filling in for Friar Tuckhisballsonue, I’m Howie Feltersnatch
Think drafting tournament teams is easy? Think again. See some photos caught from Tuesday night’s marathon session and you decide…
See below to see which team you will be suiting up for on February 22, 2014…
Jingles Jets – Skippy, LaBamba, Cribz, Hollywood, Crow, Doc and Spinner
Stevo’s Stingrays – Bearcat, Zaba, The Rake, Sunny, Soupy, Tunes, Hurricane and Junior
Lovie’s Legion of Doom – Razor, The Matador, Eagle, Bubbles, Beep, Sheepdog, Mayday and Flintstone
Snowpants’ Black Jacks – Falcon, Bulldog, Chico, Killer, Spanky, Chevy, Rocky and Sparky
New year, new lights, and new tournament teams…
2014 kicked off with a mini on Tuesday evening. Ogie and LaBamba brought some tunes to keep the tempo and the evening rockin’!
Back in Black, as selected by Soupy included: Chevy, Ogie, Cribz, The Rake, Kamikaze and Falcon
White Weddings, as selected by The Matador included: Killer, Jingles, LaBamba, Sheep Dog, Snowpants and Hollywood
Fiddler’s Green, as selected by Sunny included: Chico, Yuri, Spinner, Doc, Rocky and Razor
The pace was quick all night and the games were all close. In the end, the Fiddler’s Green team prevailed with a 3-1 record. White finished a respectable 2-2, while Black ended up 1-3.
The 3 Stars of the evening, as selected by LaBamba were:
3rd Star – The Matador
2nd Star – Razor
1st Star – Sunny
And speaking of stars, did anyone notice how bright it was inside the Kapusta Kow Palace? That’s because new lights were installed over the holiday break. In fact, some Tomcats gave up some time on the weekend to help the maintenance crew get the new lights in place.
In what is being called the longest Tomcat Tournament Draft in history, Jingles, Stevo, Lovie and Snowpants selected their teams for the 2014 tournament (to be played on February 22). Many of the boys stayed on stage to drink until the results were available. Here are the teams that will square off this year:
Jingles Jets – Skippy, LaBamba, Cribz, Hollywood, Crow, Doc and Spinner
Stevo’s Stingrays – Bearcat, Zaba, The Rake, Sunny, Soupy, Tunes, Hurricane and Junior
Lovie’s Legion of Doom – Razor, The Matador, Eagle, Bubbles, Beep, Sheepdog, Mayday and Flintstone
Snowpants’ Black Jacks – Falcon, Bulldog, Chico, Killer, Spanky, Chevy, Rocky and Sparky
Keep a close eye on the Jingle’s Jets as Jingle’s himself had to leave the game last night after hearing a slight cracking sound, followed by intense heat, in his knee after an akward fall.
This is Howie Feltersnatch filling in for Harry Ballsonue
Razor spent Christmas and New Years in England promoting the Tomcat brand. He was in negotiations with several sporting venues to host the annual Tomcat Tournament in 2015. Cardiff and Liverpool were somewhat interested, however London didn’t think they had a sports facility large enough to handle the expected crowds.
Razor did manage to sign a long term, multi-million dollar agreement with Mohamed Al-Fayed, the owner of Harrods. Harrods will be the exclusive carrier of all Tomcat swag for the UK.
Draft For Feb. Tournament goes right after Hockey
Beer Bringers: La Bamba, Tomcats
Net Minders: Razor, Falcon, Hollywood
In the Line Up: Rake, Rocky, Doc, Chevy, Spinner, Jingles, Killer, Cribzie, Snowpants, The Matador, Chico, Soupy, Sunny, The Turk, La Bamba, Sheep Dog, Kamikaze, Ogie
Out of the Line Up: Stevo, Bulldog, Crow, Skippy, Mez, Hurricane, Tunes, Sparky, Lovie, Spanky
I.R.: Zaba,
Not Sure: ?
The Skinny: Draft for the February Tournament will go after hockey at the Kapusta Kow Palace….stick around after to see what team you are on. Lovieville Flyers, the Snowpants Black Mamba’s, Jingles Jets or Stevo’s St. Clair Beach Stingrays????
Mini or no Mini: Mini is how she is looking….
Captains for the Mini: TBD
In The Press Box, Healthy Scratches: N/A
TOMCATS FOREVER
As we start 2014, my last few months as being the President, I wanted to say what a great ride this has been. Sitting up on stage, waiting for everyone to open their Christmas present this past December 17, really touched me. Where else would you get guys to wait. We were all like little kids at Christmas waiting to open our gift from Tomcat Santa. The Tomcat Spirit is alive and well…soon the draft will be done for the upcoming tournament and before you know it, the tournament will get played and a Stanley’s Cup Champion will get crowned and then the outdoor game will be upon us…time goes by quickly. “Life is what happens to you when you’re making other plans.” John Lennon said that and it is so true!
The Tomcats are the greatest bunch of guys I have ever had the pleasure of knowing and being with.
So as we embark on the next 14 weeks of hockey, I leave you with a quote from Nelson Mandela…because as Tomcats, we need to always continue trying to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous!
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and a fabulous?”
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us, it’s in everyone, and as we let our own light shine, we consciously give other people
permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Nelson Mandela
God Bless the Tomcats.
Stevo
In our quest to spread the Tomcat Brand world-wide, we are starting to chronicle where our newly minted Tomcat Dog Tag Bottle Openers are worn. Chico brought his to Hollywood Florida for the holidays and has proof:
(secretly, Chico is just trying to show us all his nips!)
While at a bar, a cute waitress asked to wear the dog tag as well. Shortly thereafter, Chico signed her breast with a sharpie…it’s great to be a Tomcat!
Where will you wear your dog tag???