ALL NEW!
June 28, 2011 – 12:30 The Canadian Press
BOSTON – There has been much Internet speculation about which member of the Boston Bruins ordered an Amstel Light during an expensive night of celebrating with the Stanley Cup.
Now the brewery is offering a reward to try to solve the mystery once and for all.
Amstel Light says in a press release it will provide free beer during the player’s day with the Stanley Cup and at a Canada Day or Independence Day barbecue if he identifies himself.
A bill for more than US$156,000 at the MGM-Foxwoods Casino surfaced after the Bruins celebrated there, following their Stanley Cup parade on June 18. The itemized bill included 136 Bud Lights and several liquor orders in addition to the sole Amstel Light.
“We want to reward the Bruin who ordered the Amstel Light to recognize him for making a great decision,” the company said in Tuesday’s press release.
The most expensive item on the Bruins’ bill was a 30-litre bottle of Ace of Spades “Midas” champagne valued at $100,000 — something members of the team claim they didn’t actually pay for.
“We had been given as a gift the bottle of champagne from Foxwoods and we knew after when we finished with it we would sign it and Foxwoods would auction it off,” captain Zdeno Chara said last week at the NHL awards in Las Vegas. “That number that is posted up is nowhere near what the actual price of the bill was. All I have to say is we are very disappointed that something like this is coming out that is not true.”
Expensive celebrations have been in style lately. Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban picked up a $130,000 bar tab — which included a $90,000 bottle of champagne and $20,000 tip — after his team beat Miami to become NBA champions.
If it was the Tomcats, it would have been 136 MGD’s, 24 Bud Lights, 24 Keith’s, 12 Golden Pheasant and 12 Rolling Rock.
…by Harry Ballsonue
A slight light rain at the start of the Tomcat golf outing did not panic the 20 golfers that set out to concur the course, everyone had a great round and most returned back to Mykel Jaworiwsky’s house for ‘Sovlaki night in Canada’….fun time had by all there, as well.
“A special honourable mention should be made to the organizer”, Chris Girard had said and then continued, “to Snowpants Ferranti, who did a great job keeping the tournament alive and on a roll and I can say, that everyone had a blast” Girard had said, with a smirk.
Snowpants, wanting to commemorate the event, set off a small fire work that panicked a three golfers who had a pace makers, two Vietnam Vets and the golf pro at the golf course, “What? Snowpants asked, they blow off fireworks at the end of Tiger game, I thought it would be fun to do the same at the Tomcat golf outing”. Ferranti had said, with a sheepish smile, as he was being led off the Seven Lakes property by security.
Chris Girard announced that the Tomcat golf outing, raised, 3.7 million dollars on the day, for ‘women who want larger breasts’.
“We will be able to help a lot of women throughout Canada, the U.S and the world with this money, so it is a great day for everyone”. Girard had said.
In the meantime, the Minister of Fireworks and Explosive Devices (and Golf), Snowpants Ferranti, is looking for a new site to play at next year’s golf event, “We are not welcome back here, and need to find a new place, we are looking at Woodland Hills in Belle River at this time, it is 9 – par 3 holes, but right now, it is the only place we can get on, even Tecumseh golf is not returning my phone calls, to see if we can play mini putt”. Snowpants Ferranti had said.
“There are no pants, like Snowpants” Mykel Jaworiwsky had said.
Tomcats want to thank Mike, Diane and Tess for hosting the party and for a great poster that Tess had made, welcoming the Windsor Tomcats.
That is it, for Tomcat events for the 2010-2011 season, I don’t know what I am going to do with myself. Season Starts back up on September 20, 2011 and I will write an article or two in August for the start of the season, but for now, I wish everyone the best and safest summer season!
If I see you laying on the beach tanning yourself, I will put my Harry Ballsonue, on your forehead and belly.
… By Harry Ballsonue
It has now been over 5 weeks since the Tomcats have laced up their floor hockey shoes and played ball hockey on the Kapusta Kow floor, personally I miss it. I miss the guys, I miss the horsing around, I miss the “Snowpants blows Sparky” chants between the games. I cannot report on something that is not longer happening, but I can report on the Tomcat pool. Paul ‘Junior’ Poisson, who won the regular season pool by a land slide, has slid himself into 13th spot in the playoff pool. And now, with Bulldog Meloche having a onetime 23 point league on Jingles Jingleroo, is now only up by 11 points with no players left. It is a horse race folks and it could come down to the wire. (I have submitted the stats, as of June 6 for you to review)
Reminder that the Tomcats are hosting their yearend Golf Outing, Friday June 10.
18-20 Tomcats will be on hand to sign autographs and to support the Chris Girard Charity, ‘Bigger Breasts for women that want them’. It is an extremely important charity, one that is recognized by all Tomcats. “Bob Skoretz, originally started up the charity, it is for women who want a breast enlargement, but can not afford it, we the Windsor Tomcats have held this golf event to raise money for the enlargements. Cuz who wants to see a women held back, if she wants bigger breasts. I am very happy and excited to say that we have now raised over 39 million dollars in just over 12 years, with just this one day event.” Stated Tomcat Charity Chairperson Chris Girard.
Party after at Assistant Captain’s Mykel Jaworiwsky. All are invited to attend the party, I am told.
I can put my golf balls and my Harry Ballsonue.
WASHINGTON—Those who planned the secret mission to get Osama bin Laden in Pakistan knew it was a one-shot deal, and it nearly went terribly wrong.
The U.S. deliberately hid the operation from Pakistan, and predicted national outrage over the breach of Pakistani sovereignty would make it impossible to try again if the raid on bin Laden’s suspected redoubt came up dry.
Once the raiders reached their target, things started to go awry almost immediately, officials briefed on the operation said.
Adding new details to the account of the assault, officials described just how the SEAL raiders loudly ditched a foundering helicopter right outside bin Laden’s door, ruining the plan for a surprise assault. That forced them to abandon plans to run a squeeze play on bin Laden — simultaneously entering the house stealthily from the roof and the ground floor.
Instead, they busted into the ground floor and began a floor-by-floor storming of the house, working up to the top level where they had assumed bin Laden — if he was in the house — would be.
They were right.
The raiders came face-to-face with bin Laden in a hallway outside his bedroom, and three of the Americans stormed in after him, U.S. officials briefed on the operation told The Associated Press. The officials spoke on condition of anonymity to describe a classified operation. (But we now have learned that some of them were Sgt. Dean Colasanti, Brigadier General Louis Koenigsberger, Maj Kevin Kuprowski, Cpl First Class Mike Edgar, Cpl First Class Sammy Salaris, Cpl First Class Dave Dzibela, PVT First Class Shane Renaud, PVT First Class Ray MacDonell and PVT First Class ‘Chevy’ ‘Shove’wczuk, PCT Paul Renaud. PCT Josh Goldstien and PCT Ken Cribley, Others to be named as the article continues)
U.S. officials believe Pakistani intelligence continues to support militants who attack U.S. troops in Afghanistan, and actively undermine U.S. intelligence operations to go after Al Qaeda inside Pakistan. The level of distrust is such that keeping Pakistan in the dark was a major factor in planning the raid, and led to using the high-tech but sometimes unpredictable helicopter technology that nearly unhinged the mission.
“Every time we told them we were going in Bin Laden was not there, this time, we said nothing, and BAM there he was, eating cheesy popcorn and watching YouPorn”. Stated Major General Andrew Wade Morgan.
Pakistan’s government has since condemned the action and threatened to open fire if U.S. forces enter again.
“I would like to see them try”. Major General George Metulynsky.
On Monday, the two partners attempted to patch up relations, agreeing to pursue high-value targets jointly.
“Yes, I am on the negotiation team, and things are going well, them bitches aren’t really listening right now, but they will,” Stated Lieutenant General Paul Poisson
The decision to launch on that particular moonless night in May came largely because too many American officials had been briefed on the plan. U.S. officials feared if it leaked to the press, bin Laden would disappear for another decade.
“Yeah, we told too many of our peeps on that one.” Stated Brigadier General Louis Koenigsberger.
U.S. special operations forces have made approximately four forays into Pakistani territory since the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks, though this one, some 145 kilometers inside Pakistan, was unlike any other, the officials say.
The job was given to a TOMCAT/SEAL Team 9 unit, (Named after Sniper Dave Crawford) just back from Afghanistan, one official said. This elite branch of TOMCAT/SEALs had been hunting bin Laden in eastern Afghanistan since 2001 and playing ball hockey on Tuesday nights.
TWO very large aircraft flew from Jalalabad, Afghanistan, one piloted by Captain Andy Brewin, the other by Captain Darek Kowalzcykowski, with three school-bus-size Chinook helicopters landing in a deserted area roughly two-thirds of the way to bin Laden’s compound in the Pakistani city of Abbottabad, two of the officials explained.
Aboard two Black Hawk helicopters were 23 SEALs, an interpreter (Matty ‘The Matador’ Yousef) and a tracking Bulldog named Wilson. (See Lakeshore Auto web site for a picture of Wilson) Nineteen SEALs would enter the compound and three of them would find bin Laden, one official said, providing the exact numbers for the first time. (Three to find him were CPL Victor Ferranti, Sgt. John Salaris and CPL Chad Comartin)
Aboard the Chinooks were two dozen more SEALs, as backup. (Gerald Finnerty, Barry Morris, Chris Girard, Nick Lelyk, Doob Duruocher, George Matton, Peter White, Marty Thibert, Uwe Jamieson and Mark Jennings, just to name a few)
The Black Hawks were specially engineered to muffle the tail rotor and engine sound, two officials said. The added weight of the stealth technology meant cargo was calculated to the gram, with weather factored in. The night of the mission, it was hotter than expected. (CPL Victor Ferranti was not allowed to bring his tuck taped hockey stick due to the extra weight)
The Black Hawks were to drop the TOMCAT/SEALs and depart in less than two minutes, in hopes locals would assume they were Pakistani aircraft visiting the nearby military academy.
One Black Hawk was to hover above the compound, with TOMCAT/SEALs sliding down ropes into the open courtyard.
The second was to hover above the roof to drop TOMCAT/SEALs there, then land more TOMCAT/SEALs outside, plus an interpreter and the dog, which would track anyone who tried to escape and alert TOMCAT/SEALs to any approaching Pakistani security forces.
If troops appeared, the plan was to hunker down in the compound, avoiding armed confrontation with the Pakistanis while officials in Washington negotiated their passage out. Stefan Jaworiwsky had his blackberry ready for communication.
The two TOMCAT/SEAL teams inside would work toward each other, in a simultaneous attack from above and below, their weapons silenced, guaranteeing surprise, one of the officials said. They would have stormed the building in a matter of minutes, as they’d done time and again in two training models of the compound.
The plan unraveled as the first helicopter (piloted by Captain Mike Menzel) tried to hover over the compound. The Black Hawk skittered around uncontrollably in the heat-thinned air, forcing the pilot to land. As he did, the tail and rotor got caught on one of the compound’s 3.6-metre walls. The pilot quickly buried the aircraft’s nose in the dirt to keep it from tipping over, and the TOMCAT/SEALs clambered out into an outer courtyard.
The other aircraft (Piloted by Major Dean Meloche) did not even attempt hovering, landing its TOMCAT/SEALs outside the compound.
Now the raiders were outside, and they’d lost the element of surprise.
They had trained for this, and started blowing their way in with explosives, through walls and doors, working their way up the three-level house from the bottom.
They had to blow their way through barriers at each stair landing, firing back as one of the men in the house fired at them.
They shot three men as well as one woman, whom U.S. officials have said lunged at the TOMCAT/SEALs.
Small knots of children were on every level, including the balcony of bin Laden’s room. Tomcat posters of their favourite hockey players were pinned up on their bedroom walls.
As three of the TOMCAT/SEALs reached the top of the steps on the third floor, they saw bin Laden standing at the end of the hall. The Tomcats recognized him instantly, the officials said.
Bin Laden also saw them, dimly outlined in the dark house, and ducked into his room, with his half eaten bag of cheesy popcorn.
The three TOMCAT/SEALs assumed he was going for a weapon, and one by one they rushed after him through the door, one official described.
Two women were in front of bin Laden — yelling and trying to protect him, two officials said. The first TOMCAT/SEAL (Snowpants Ferranti) grabbed the two women and copped a feel and shoved them away, fearing they might be wearing suicide bomb vests, they said.
The TOMCAT/SEAL behind him (Chad Comartin) opened fire at bin Laden, putting one bullet in his chest, and one in his head.
It was over in a matter of seconds.
Back at the White House Situation Room, word was relayed that bin Laden had been found, signaled by the code words “Flying Cooler Lid.” That was not bin Laden’s code name, but rather a representation of the letter “F.” Each step of the mission was labeled alphabetically, and “Flying Cooler Lid” meant that the raiders had reached step “F,” the killing or capture of bin Laden, two officials said.
As the TOMCAT/SEALs (COL. Mykel Jaworiwsky with his new Nikon) began photographing the body for identification, the raiders found an AK-47 rifle and a Russian-made Makarov pistol on a shelf by the door they’d just run through. Bin Laden hadn’t touched them.(But wanted to)
They were among a handful of weapons that were removed to be inventoried.
It took approximately 15 minutes to reach bin Laden, one official said. The next 23 or so were spent blowing up the broken chopper, after rounding up nine women and 18 children, to get them out of range of the blast.
One of the waiting Chinooks (piloted by Major Dave Hann) flew in to pick up bin Laden’s body, the raiders from the broken aircraft and the weapons, documents and other materials seized at the site.
The helicopters flew back to Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan, and the body was flown to a waiting U.S. Navy ship for bin Laden’s burial at sea, ensuring no shrine would spring up around his grave.
When the TOMCAT/SEAL team met President Barack Obama, and his Presidential Aid Vince Vlaminck, both did not ask who shot bin Laden. The President simply thanked each member of the team, two officials said. The officials also said that they all enjoyed icy cold MGD’s at the White House.
In a few weeks, the team that killed bin Laden will go back to training, and in a couple of months, back to work overseas, but will be back to play the first night of floor hockey on Tuesday September 22, 2011.
…That is to say, the New DemoTomcatic Party.
…By Stefan Jaworiwsky
Excuse me, if I am a bit clumsy here, almost like having sex for the very first time, writing for the Tomcat web site as I am not as polished as some of the others like Blogger Bloggerstien, Heywood Jewblowme and of course Harry Ballsonue. We had our Advisory Committee meeting on May 12 and I am happy to report on the following;
I will do it by high lighting the category and then talking a bit about each topic.
ATTENDEES Michael Jaworiwsky, Paul Poisson, Andy Morgan, Chad Comartin, Kevin Kuprowski, Paul Ranud, Michael Edgar and Stefan Jaworiwsky.
MONEY We have $1,040 in the Tomcat Coffers. Some of the money will be used to buy a ‘start of the year’ Tomcat item. See ‘New Item’. So…some of the money will be spent.
OUTDOOR GAME Game will continue next year and the trophy is to be named the BULLDOG OUT DOOR GAME TROPHY or something like that, still to be determined. Looking for ideas from everyone.
RECRUITMENT There will be no new recruitment for this year. David Hann is moving to Kitchener and will be playing a lesser role this year than last year but he will not be replaced as Darek Kowalczykowski is on the mend and could be back as early as the new year or for the tournament.
ROCKY JOINS Chad Comartin will be joining the Tomcat I.T. Department and will be working alongside Andy Morgan to continue the great product known as the Tomcat web page.
NEW ITEM Nadia Metulynsky will be happy about this, we are looking at getting a pair of nice soccer shorts for ball hockey. It will have the Tomcat logo on it and your number. That will be given to everyone at the start of the season (once we know the size you need) & once your money is paid for the season.
SPEAKING OF MONEY Yes I know we have $1,040 dollars, but it has been decided that either $40 or $50 will be paid at the start of the season, depending on what the cost of the shorts will be. We are waiting for a quote on the price of the shorts and once that is established, we will let everyone know. Bottom line, if the price point is at a certain point then it would be $40 for the year and the Tomcats would subsidize the shorts. If it hits a bit of higher price point we would ask for $50 for hockey and further subsidize the short…no matter what, the cost will include your first night of hockey.
TOURNAMENT CAPTAINS At this very moment the three Captains are George Metulysnky, David Hann and Steve Jaworiwsky, however, we are having discussions with David Hann and whether or not he would feel comfortable being a Captain with not being around full time (he has excepted a position in the Kitchener area and his attendance will drop drastically even from last year). A back up Captain would be Anthony Meloche. (IF you notice the four selected, they have been with the Tomcats the longest) Also, if Rocky’s tournament team had to be disbanded (lost more than 2 players) than Bulldog Melohce would become the fourth Captain.
GOLF SHIRT The Committee brought up the fact that it is time for a ‘nice’ Tomcat golf shirt to be introduced. Meaning a good quality shirt that could be worn to church on Sunday’s. A quote on the price is being looked into and this product will be the sole responsibility of each Tomcat. So if you want a golf shirt, the cost would be yours. (They are looking into one of the self breathing, pretty nylon, with a solid colour and a nice small logo shirt) Consider buying two, as they would make a great Father’s Day gift. (if they were to be ready for Father’s Day..which they won’t)
MINI TOURNAMENTS 3 goalies are to be deployed when man power dictates it. The consensuses was that a very good majority of the Tomcats love the mini tournament and it is better than playing with 5 spares. Bottom line…they will continue and three goalies will be used as there is ownership from a goaltending standpoint if three goalies play. It is also anticipated that Skippy Renaud will be back in the line up next year and that would give the Tomcats three goalies.
GOLF The tournament is being run by the Minister of Golf, Snowpants Ferranti and everything is going well. The cost is $70 to golf and to eat back at Michael Jaworiwsky’s house. All non golfing Tomcats are encouraged to attend for the party after…if you are going to eat, bring $10 bucks and your own booze….Michael Jaworiwsky announced he will be making his famous ‘Sovlaki night in Canada’ meal . Come on out and keep the Tomcat Spirit alive on June 10.
EVERYONE LIKES IT TIGHT The Minister of Equipment Chad Comartin will be tightening up the nets at the start of the season.
I would like to thank all the participants of the meeting and one thing I want to do is thank the most recent participants Chris Girard and John Lechicky. It is a combination of the great work that is done off the Kapusta Kow floor that makes the product so great on the Kapusta Kow floor. Thank you everyone. Players, fans, significant others…..thanks to another great year.
TOMCATS FOREVER!
Steven Jaworiwsky,
(Harry palm Press):
Could there be any finer way to end such a spectacular season than with what has become known as the annual “Bulldog” outdoor classic cup. Did you see the newest trophy that was added to commemorate the event. At press time this new addition had yet to receive an official name. I for one strongly endorse “The outdoor classic cup” – The event will always be referred to as the annual Bulldog outdoor classic cup, but the trophy name shortened a bit just seems right. Hopefully Tomcat owners/mamnagers and stakeholders will agree. It may well come down to a vote at an annual general meeting – and I will try to sneak in and make my voice heard.
Turning our attention to the actual game wasn’t too hard – and fans were treated to a heck of a show. In the end Team white lead by “Rocky” prevailed and took home the new cup. What a season for Rock – successfully taking both the tourny, and now the outdoor cup – truly his mantle overflows with trophies! While the Rock may have taken the tourney as captaining the White team to victory – he wasn’t the standout player. That honour for White went to “Sparky” who chipped in some clutch goals, and scoring one beauty that would make any highlight reel – way to go “Spark”. White just seemed to really have it together and had a really strong showing by newcomer “Nicholas” who was all over my score sheet, contributing in all 3 periods with either goals or assist. He was only beaten out by the veteran as “Sparky” had that highlight reel goal, scored the overtime winner, and also popped in a shootout goal. Goaltending for White was also solid, with “The Danish” and “Bearcat” leading the charge. It was also fitting and well deserved seing how fans haven’t seen the Bearcat in some time, that he actually took home the MVP for all goalies. That indeed is an impressive feat, considering Razor and Falcon stood in the way on the Black team
Speaking of Black – they were lead by All star and MVP “Husky Eyes”, which wasn’t a sure bet as “Hollywood also turned in MVP style play as well. At voting time there was some deep discussions between the two candidates. Hollywood may have had the edge at one point with his gutsy decision to put “Jingles” in over the elder Jaworiwsky for the shootout. What a story that would have been in only the Danish could of stopped Jingles.
Spares brought in from the farm teams for both sides played well, with the standout by far being Nick – management was very happy to see if ever neeed, some of the younger talnet would be able to come in and fill any void.
Like all good things – the season has ended, the players departed to enjoy the summer fun, all the while already thinking of when the puck will drop again and another chapter can be wriiten into Tomcat lore.
Back at the Dompolski hall for the celebrations, I’m just glad I didn’t have to whisper to any player or fan -Yuri HANDSONMECAC.
Yuri
By Bloggy Bloggerstein
The 2011 Outdoor Classic has been creating a buzz for months, much more than the NHL all-star game which was held somewhere where Nascar is king, or college football, maybe baseball…oh no, it’s college basketball, possibly WNBA? Shit, I can’t even remember. Suffice it to say that the 2011 Tomcat Outdoor Classic blew the doors of Bettman’s scrimmage. The crowd was filled with a bevy of beauties, which got the players amped up and got things off to a quick start. Unfortunately it became clear that they:
Are not into fat guys
Are not into old guys
Are not into sweaty old fat guys who are struggling to breathe
Were all there to watch Snowpants anyway
Once the guys got to playing hockey instead of rifling shots of the glass and checking their feathered hair in the reflection to impress the ladies the hockey really improved. Lovie got the scoring started by using his ancient Aztec sundial to figure out the angle of the sun, blinding Falcon and dribbling a weak shot into the corner. Bulldog was tenacious as always but showed a little more of his hands than he normally does by scoring a couple sweet goals.
“You gotta give the paying customers something” said a jubilant Bulldog after the overtime victory. “If anyone wants more I will be changing out in the parking lot in 5 minutes. Hubba hubba…”.
Stevo scored a Messier-like goal gliding down his off-wing before firing a beautiful wrister between the wickets. Fill-in Nick rifled a couple fantastic one-timers in as the white squad showed off their offensive zone gameplan drawn up by Rocky.
Team Black MVP candidates were Sunny, Razor, Doc, Stevo, Hollywood, Falcon, Killer and Vanilla Ice.
Team White MVP candidates were Bulldog, Nick, Bearcat, Snowy, Chevy, Junior, Carson, Sparky and Rocky.
The troops piled over to the Polski for some well-earned beverages. The Golden Pheasant and Tyskie were flying off the shelves. The shots of Buffalo Grass and Honey Vodka were tasty little buggers that were smooth despite torching one’s esophagus like napalm…
There was a loud, rabid crowd at the Polski as some sort of gaming was occurring at the tables.
“I think it’s poker” said Louis. “Holy shit!” replied George, “She’s 85 years old you sick bastard. Leave her alone”.
After the speeches Hollywood suggested singing the Tomcats Forever anthem, which was fitting for our final night, but not while staring in the faces of 34 people who all look like your grandparents while emphatically air-fisting “up your poop-chute” and “in your vagina”…
“They went from smiling happily thinking they were hearing an eastern-european football chant to a look of absolute horror” said Sunny. “That woman over there puked in the corner before scrambling to the front door”.
“Don’t get me wrong, I love the song” said Lovie. “I just thought we should be respectful and wait until these people went home. I even gave Holly the throat-cut gesture when he mentioned it. He just gave me an evil smile and started singing. Darek will be banned for sure”.
George also got his usual plethora of laughter from the boys. His jokes included a Driving Miss Daisy reference (some of you will get this, some won’t), a couple ethnically-themed funnies as well as this gem:
“In Junior’s neighbourhood the spread penicillin with a fucking crop duster”. We all roared, including Soupy, until Sunny reminded him that he lives seven doors down. Hey, that would be a great band name…
A big thanks goes out to the spares who came to play, Darek for refereeing, Skippy for scorekeeping and stats, Jingles for almost fighting my buddy and for getting pizza and especially Bulldog for all the great work. The trophy is a beauty. I can’t wait to get a better look at it so I can count all Bulldog’s notches on that bedpost.
To top off the evening Hollywood showed the true nature of the great Tomcat organization. No, not when he kept hitting on the bartender or puked on Doc’s shoes. He gave a load of the remaining pizza to a couple of customers in the bar who really appreciated it. Stay classy boys. You smell like rich mahogany.
- I think Steve said it best:
Picture Caption: I think Stevo said it best: “Here is a picture to consider showing once the season is officially over….I have no caption idea…I have no suggestions as to why I think it would be a good picture to use…just that it says Windsor Tomcats…and those are our sticks resting for the off season.”
…by Harry Ballsonue
The 2010-2011 Tomcat hockey season has come to an end, with the Bulldog Outdoor Game held at Lansberry Park. “It gives our fans a chance to see us and the more that can attend the better”, minister of outdoor games, Bulldog Meloche had said and then added, “I’m very happy with the outcome and how it all went down this year”. Bulldog Meloche concluded.
Team White, lead by stellar defenseman Rocky Comartin, who has a hot wife, won in the 3:12 minute mark of the over time to win the Bulldog Outdoor Game Trophy, a back hand shot by Sparky Renaud sealed the deal as it went by a razor sharp net minder Razor MacDonnell. “I was very happy to get that one”, indicated Renaud, “I’m a dancer, I’m a prancer and now I’m a overtime goal scorer”. He had said.
All four goalies had a good showing, The Razor, The Falcon, the Bearcat and also the Danish.
Only Tomcats missing, were Dave Crawford (had to attend a funeral), Ken Cribley (work commitment) Shamus Goldstien (nursing an upper body injury) Soupy Salaris (personal family reason)and Andy Morgan (illness). But everyone else was there, Louis the Rake, Sparky Renaud, Rocky Comartin, Yuri Metulynsky, Hollywood Jaworiwsky, Doc Brewin, Chevy Szcewczuk, Stevo, Spinner, Bulldog, Jingles, Lovie, Sunny, Killer and Snowpants (a crowd favourite).
From the spare list, LaBamba, the Matador and the Hurricane were not able to make it.
Big thanks goes to the extras Nick, Aaron, Matt, John, Adam, Darek, Scott, Tim and Carson. Windsor Head Scout Mike Kosty, “I got to see some of the farm system and they were pretty good, not quite ready for the big leagues, but with a little bit more seasoning in the minors, you never know”.
The first period was tied 3-3. Second period was taken by white 4-1 and the third period Black took it 2-0, which lead to the over time.
“That was some good fun”, stated Lovie Edgar, “It is nice to see everyone out and playing”. Lovie added.
Everyone went back to Dom Polski including Referee Darek Kowalczykowski and statistician and team keeper Skippy Renaud. They both did a great job keeping the game going and under control. (You have a future there Zippy if the hockey career fades for you).
A full team picture was taken with all the participants.
Back at the Dom Polski Bulldog Meloche organized quite an extensive prize table, with some Rookies getting some nice new Tomcat t-shirts. Speeches were made by Assistant Captains Mykel Jaworiwsky and Sparky Renaud. They thanked Youngblood Morgan for his hard work on the web site, Bulldog Meloche for his work on the outdoor game and Ray McDonnell for his work on the ‘Tomcats Forever’ wrist band. Steven Jaworiwsky was also thanked but stated afterward, “What are they thanking me for, if it was not for everyone coming out and participating, it would be just George Metulynsky, Bulldog Meloche and I shooting hoops at the Kapusta Kow Palace. Everyone else should get the credit, not me” Jaworiwsky had stated.
June 10, 2011 is the next Tomcat outing, with golf at Seven Lakes on the agenda.
First game back is September 22, 2011. That is only 5 months away.
Till then, I will miss you Judy, I will miss you guys, I will miss you on the stage and on the floor and I will miss putting my Harry Ballsonue.
…by Harry Ballsonue
Rocky Bay Rockets; Rocky, Crow, LaBamaba, Snowpants, Bulldog, Hollywood Doc and Ray Menzel
Chevyville Storm; Chevy, Junior, Soupy, Yuri, Jingles, Killer, Razor and the Falcon
Cribztown Crusaders: Cribz, Spinner, Sparky, Youngblood, Louis the Rake, Stevo and Mike MacDonell
Scores:
Rocky 1 Chevy 2
Cribz 1 Rocky 2
Chevy 2 Cribz 1
Chevy 2 Rocky 0
Rocky 1 Cribz 0
Cribz 1 Chevy 2
A total of 15 goals were scored on the Last night at the Kapusta Kow Palace, for this year. The goaltending was spectacular. The Falcon was on Fire. The Razor was sharper than a Kansu knife. The scores were reflective of the tight ‘D’ that was being played by the likes of Ken Cribley, Chad Comartin and George Metulynsky all Norris Trophy Candidates.
Enough cannot be said about the Waterbug Dave ‘Crow’ Crawford, who zigs…zags and makes play after play after play. Bulldog Meloche scored a tap in goal on a Steve Jaworiwsky give a way that was scooped up by Crawford who made a nifty pass to Bulldog who tossed it in the net. “I could score goals like that blindfolded, all night long” stated Bulldog Meloche, “Zetterburg, Datsyuk Crawford can all be put in one sentence”. Bulldog Meloche said.
The three stars were, 3) Snowpants Ferranti 2) Dave Crawford 1) Mike Menzel. All were presented with $50 cigars, compliments of the Windsor Tomcats.
G/F G/A
Chevy Storm 8 3
Rocky Rockets 6 4
Cribz Crusaders 3 7
Chevy Storm seemed to be able to score at ease and defend. The Crusaders of Cribztown could not score, netting only 3 and let in 7. “It was disappointing” Stated team Captain Ken Cribley, “We had our chances but we could not capitalize” Cribley added.
Strong performances were also put in by, injury returning veteran Spinner Dzibela, LaBamba Vlaminck, Hollywood Jaworiwsky, Soupy Salaris and The Rake Koenigsberger.
There was no six peat for Lovie Edgar, who was with Zdeno Chara in the recovery room with a flu bug.
I watched as the Tomcats piled into their dressing room and then we (the media) were allowed in to do our interviews. The boys seemed sad that the season was over and the only event left was the outdoor game to be played Tuesday April 26, 2011 at 6:30 -8:30. The cost is $10 for hockey and $10 for pizza after.
Bulldog Meloche announced the Captains of the outdoor game as Rocky Comartin and Mykel Jaworiwsky.
Mykel Jaworiwsky agreed to stay on as ‘pool’ organizer and will be assisted by Lovie Edger and Zchabba Kowalcyzkowski next year for the NHL Regular Season Pool and then the NHL Playoff pool. (Several lovely parting gifts were presented to Mykel Jaworiwsky for all his efforts in the past) The Younger Jaworiwsky was choked up about the presentation, holding back tears, he said, “I will stay on if I get some assistance, I thank all of you, you are the bestest in the westest”. He had said.
After we (the media) were ushered off the stage area, I could see catering vehicles brining in food for the Tomcats. I could not see what they were about to be served, but it might have been Cordon Bleu Chicken, Beef Wellington and BBQ Steaks along with Scalloped Potatoes and Salads or…..it could have been kielbasa and cheese from the Polish Deli on Walker….I don’t know.
A two goalie mini tournament system was implemented. It worked well, but as Youngblood Morgan said to me after, “The goalies do not have ownership of a team. I find that is the only drawback. They were both outstanding tonight.” Youngblood Morgan added.
Dave Crawford, Soupy Salaris, Doc Brewin were the three of the five new Tomcats this year that played in the last night of hockey, with Zippy Renaud and Shamus Goldstein nursing injuries. Doc Brewin said he was sad to see the season end so quickly, “I plan to be back next year of course, how can I leave. Great bunch of guys and I plan to help out more. Whatever Stevo needs doing, I’ll be the doer…I want to help” Brewin said. Dave Crawford, who signed a 17 year 119 million dollar deal with the Tomcats in the off season said he had a fantastic time this year, “I can’t say enough about it, super guys and I always enjoy myself”. Crawford indicated.
Back at Purples, Soupy Salaris who was not going to Purples, was talked into coming out ‘for one’. As I was leaving, at around midnight, as I had a dead line to write this article, there was Soupy, sitting at Purples with the boys talking politics. The essence of the Tomcats, welcome the new and let them join in on the fun.
Another tremendous Tomcat Hockey Season comes to an end I will cover the outdoor game next week. As they say, “Tomcats Forever”.
Next week, as you sit on the bench at Lansberry Park, I will for sure for sure, put my Harry Ballsonue.
Windsor Tomcats 