It was a well fought battle to the end, on the Kapusta Kow Palace floor last night! Sitting in the press box, watching the amazing back and forth of hockey, rumour had it going around the sewing circle, it possibly was the longest game, up to the seven score, in Tomcat history!
Razor was “razor sharp” in his outing, playing in net for the White Lightning last night! On the other side of the floor for the Black Thunder, Bearcat was pouncing, and attacking every shot the Lightning was throwing at him!
The Black Thunder consisted of Stevo, Doc, Chico, Snowpants, Cribz, Sparky, Junior (yes Junior)! The White Lightning had Hurricane, Shovey, Rocky, Soooouuuupppppy, Turk, Hollywood, and the Matador! The White Lightning were victorious in both games, with a 7-4 in the long game, and in a second, time determined game they won with a 4-1 final.
The thing about game one last night, with the score 0-0, sixteen scoreless minutes of hockey played, Hurricane had three points on the score sheet somehow? The statisticians were trying to figure how in the heck that happened!
Razor busted out his version of Wham’s “Careless Whisper.” Goose bumps perked up on everyone’s arms, and hair rose on the backs of their necks! “Whenever he croons a tune, I smile from ear to ear” said a happy Matador. Doc was quoted saying, “My wife and I are thinking of bringing the Karaoke party out of retirement just so Razor can host the evening!” Chico was overheard saying “I hope he sings I want your sex, I loooooove that song.”
And speaking of musical talents, in my recent travels, I noticed Cribz moonlighting as a trumpet player at the Kitchener/Waterloo Oktoberfest festivities. When he plays his trumpet, all the lady’s hearts melt! Take a look…
Thanking you all for reading, and for having girlfriends and wives!
Phil Landerer!
So to be honest, I am not much of a blogger. I like to play hockey, drink beer, make fun of Dave Hann (who by the way had about 75% of his facts incorrect on his blog), score a coupe of goals, go home and maybe get lucky. But on occasion it would be nice to have strange hot girls touching my balls and having their picture taken…
Chevy
Apparently there is actually another person known as Rocky, and for some reason Philadelphia decided to make a statue of him. To help bring notoriety to this other Rocky, the Tomcat Rocky agreed to pose next to the statue recently. Rumor is that visits to the statue have increased significantly since.
Fans had initially heard the rumor they would get to see another mini tournament, which would have included a very rare appearance in net by the Hurricane; who is set on maintaining one appearance in net for each of his 20 plus years as a Tomcat. When it came to game time however any disappointment fans or Hurricane may have had disappeared very quickly in what wound up to be a classic stellar match up of the Tighty Whities and Black Jacks. The Whities were lead by the dangerous scoring trio of Beep, Snowpants and Stevo. The Jacks countered with their trio of Rocky, Killer and Soupy. Falcon backstopped the Whities and Skippy was given the rare back to back start in net and played for the Jacks.
The first game featured the Jacks holding a distinctive 4 goal advantage until the Whities woke up, clawed back and made it interesting; but eventually came ever so close with a 7-5 ending. The second game was even more interesting with each team exchanging goals and staring at each other with a 6-6 game on the line. With the game tied both teams players laid it all on the line searching for that elusive 7th goal, which was found by the Whities; but not without controversy, some yelling and a spirited discussion about what height a ‘high stick’ really is.
Five weeks into the season and fans along with players have already witnessed two separate “controversies”. The first was back in week two when an alleged eight goals were scored in a single highly contested game. That particular controversy centered around Stevo yelling “Play the ball”, and everyone froze leading to a charged discussion about goal; or no goal. This week was no different in a controversial goal, the scenario just went down another path and centered instead around an alleged high stick. The teams chatted and further discussion was put to rest with everyone accepting Sunny’s version of no high stick. Sparky summed it up best when he was overheard commenting, “If Sunny says it wasn’t a high stick – it WASN’T a high stick”. The Jacks grudgingly accepted the loss, which lead to the inevitable discussion of a third tie breaking game. With time against the teams play was agreed upon to a score of 3; which was taken for all the marbles by the Jacks in a 3-1 final.
The initial problem faced by players was the first two games took just over an hour and a half to play, thanks in part to Falcon and Skippy trading outstanding saves at each end of the floor. Even with the teams settling on playing to 3, statistically it meant each team was only able to score a goal every 6.17 minutes. Had there been a mini, that would have definitely lead to some goose eggs being posted by Falcon and Skippy. Hurricane later commented, “I was really excited to get a chance to keep my streak alive, particularly this early in the season. I was ready to go, and maybe with the clinic Falcon and Skippy gave I might have gotten off easy.” Regardless of controversy on the floor, Tomcats pack it away once on stage and enjoying the rewards of a cold frosty one with the boys. As well, Sparky modeled the next Tomcats rage in wearable clothing with a proposed golf shirt and shorts being showcased. Both looked promising, even on Sparky.
Fans may not only get to see the Hurricane in action next week, but also another goalie as both Razor and Falcon are rumored to be taking the day of, and Skippy has yet to commit. Tomcats management reminds players to see Snowpants now to book an escort, should their significant other not be available on November 30th to celebrate the Tomcats annual Xmas bash.
All I can say is when I heard ‘escorts’ I had to leave and placed my HANDZONMECAC.
Yurri
Fans may have arrived a little more rested this past Tuesday for the weekly Tomcat tilt, considering many were just overcoming their turkey tryptophan hangovers; but that sleepiness was quickly erased when the fans learned they would be able to witness the very first Mini Tournament of the year. The three teams consisted of the Hollywood Hookers, backed by Hollywood, Sunny, Stevo, Labamba, Turk, The Rake and Falcon as their goalie; Rocky’s Rockheads featuring Rocky, Beep, Spinner, Matador, Bulldog, Jingles and Razor in net; and finally Cribz Crawlers, starring Cribz, Soupy, Snowpants, Mez, Sparky, Hurricane, and Skippy as tender.
During the tourny I think there were more than a few Tomcats players who had yet to overcome the cursed turkey tryptophan, particularly when you consider only 22 goals were scored in the combined 6 total games played. Even Snowpants at first seemed a little slower – I mean we hardly had to squint at the super slow-mo to see him clearly.
When the three star selection was later announced not a single goaltender got the nod, and together they were pretty impressive posting a combined 3.6G.A.A. That would have been much lower had it not been for an unusual 5 goals scored on Razor and Skippy having one bad period letting in 4. Games otherwise were very close, even those that featured the explosion of goals; because almost all were settled by less than a goal.
The third star, being LaBamba, blasted a beauty past Skippy in the top left corner to lift the Hookers to their first mini tourny win. Afterwards Labamba stated, “Cribz and the boys really came from out of nowhere and took advantage of some of the earlier games and had they won they would have taken it all – I was just in the right spot and was able to knock it in”. A beauty of a goal indeed, and worthy of Labamba receiving the 3rd star nod.
While Rocky’s Rockheads wound up with four points and a 1-2-1 record scoring only a total of 4 goals. And yes, I said 4 total goals scored – A testament to the tight games played, great defense and solid goaltending displayed. Rock played solid defense all night, earning him the 2nd star.
First star went to Sunny, who helped the Hookers take it all, just edging Cribz and his pesky Crawlers. Those Crawlers were an interesting team as most had them totally out of it as they started 0-2. Funny thing about tourny’s, because the Crawlers ended up a goal short of taking it all. If they had won the last game, their total would have been 2-2-0. Snowpants summed it up best when he said, “We missed that by the slimmest of margins, which just goes to show your never really out of it as a team in these mini’s; and Skippy really only had that one bad period.”
The only thing that would have made it even more exciting would have been the unveiling of the new score clock. Fans can barely contain their excitement and word is sponsorship spaces are quickly being snapped out. Word also has it Snowpant’s escort service was last heard to be in negotiations to have their logo plastered on an entire side. Only a true Tomcat would know chicks and beer are always a good bet regardless of the economy. Until next week, I will be Pattyn Megryoin waiting for another Tomcat game.
Pattyn (Filling in for Yurri)
With negotiations completed at the Big 3, it’s time to get back to normal around here. It was a difficult round of bargaining, it reminded me of going out for lunch with Lovie (when the bill comes they forgot their wallet), then promise they’ll get it the next time.
The score clock is coming along wonderfully – it has gone through the paint department and is in the painstaking process of being assembled. It has been a long road from the design phase, prototype development, durability testing, re-design, test market trials, pre- production models and finally to the production model that will be unveiled at the Windsor International Time Clock Show. This will be held at the Kapusta Kow Palace in the very near future – stay tuned for the date and time. There will be dignitaries from across the globe as this is the biggest innovation in Ball Hockey since the invention of the orange ball! I can hardly wait until we start on the design for the retractable roof for the Kapusta Kow.
Sparky
I will admit when I first glimpsed along the longer than ususal bench of the Black Jacks I thought they had this thing already won. I mean with a lineup including Beep, Rocky, Spinner, Chevy, and other notable ‘scorers’ I fully expected the BlackJacks to run away with it, despite having a rare appearance in net by Skippy.
Falcon and the Tighty Whities lead by Stevo had other plans, and for several highlight minutes of the three game tilt it looked like the ‘Stevo’ show as the veteran continued to deke out poor Skippy. The Tighty Whities also had strong showings by Snowpants, Sparky,Hurricane and others. Stevo and the Tighty whities came back from a 4 goal deficit in the first game and outlasted the BlackJacks 7-5.
The Jacks finally got it together in the second game and won in convincing fashion 7-3, which lead to the inevitable third game tie breaker. Throughout the night those first and last games went the longest and it truly was a back and forth effort by both teams showcasing their passing finess and both tenders frustrating each teams shooters. The final game ended it typical fashion, with Stevo walking in and tying up Skippy on one of his three breakaway highlight reel goals of the night, clinching it 7-5 for the Whities. afterwards I caught up with Cribz and asked his take on the evenings games – “I did think we had the shooters, I guess the problem was they had all the playmakers; and they did a great job shutting down our shooters”.
I was also fortunate enough to catch up with Falcon and wanted his thoughts on finally winning a series: “I’m glad to get that monkey off my back, but by no means were any of those games easy; Skippy pushed me to the brink and played very well for his first outing this season in net”. Stevo, being the classy guy he is also echoed Falcon’s sentiments: “I had initially predicted a mini, but with the Razor out with a lower body injury Skippy was called up in net. I may have made him look bad more than once, but he played well”. When I asked him about rumours I had heard of Bearcat making an appearance Stevo replied, “If the need arises fans will see Bearcat come out of hybernation; and he has expressed an interest to get some more games in this year. Like Skippy, Bearcat is always waiting by the phone for the call; and I don’t think the dynamics of any game changes much with the all star cast of tenders we’ve been able to sign and keep as Tomcats”.
Fans and players alike will remain glued to the Tomcats web site itching to see the next predicted lineup for the upcoming Tuesday tilt. Until then fans you can pass the time by placing Yuri HANDZONMECAC.
Yuri
The second week of the season has been played and certain similarities are beginning to become apparent. Most noteably in this writers opinion is the addition of the newest Tomcat “Beep.” Speed, finess, great hands, scoring abilities, and a quiet leader. I predict in any event requiring the picking of teams, whether they be for tournaments, mini’s, or anything else, Beep will be in those top three picks. More often than not expect him to go first over all; and I predict he will be taken first come the year end tourny.
During the two tilts between the Black Jacks and Tighty Whities Beep’s leadership was overheard several times; regardless of the Black Jacks never being ahead on the score board, commenting; “Don’t worry boys, play it one rush at a time, we’re still in this”. Motivating stuff, but unfortunately for the Black Jacks they fell short; twice, 8-6 and 7-4.
YES, I said 8 (EIGHT), because what great Tomcats games would be without controversy. That came in the first game with the Tighty Whities ahead and the Black Jacks making a charge for the come back win. With the score very close, the Tighty Whities scored a controversial goal. There was a point Stevo had yelled the first “Play the ball” of the season, and the Black Jacks kinda froze; which allowed a quick shot and goal by the Whities. After a few agonizing minutes Cribz had a quiet word with Stevo and the goal was erased. This of course lead to the chorus of boos from the Tighty Whities, but in the end all was for not as the Whities clinched it 7-6. But, when you really think about it, with the removal of that ‘goal’ I guess it was an eight goal game. I later spoke with Falcon, who did look unprepared for the shot, and eventual controversial goal. He candidly remarked, “When you hear the beaming voice of Stevo , you kinda freeze. I gotta remember to play the ball right to that second or even third whistle.”
Other similarities include the Razor going 4-0, with a 5.22G.A.A and Falcon of course not yet finding that elusive first ‘win.’ When I spoke to the Falcon regarding his play as of early in the year, he curtly remarked, “Who asked Razor to re-sign for another season again?” Fans did get the treat of seeing the collective Tomcats players sore point; that being the return of Skippy’s damn yellow pants. When the Skipster ran out onto the Kapusta for the first game I swear I saw Cribz cringe while yelling, ” I thought we were going to burn those.”
Zaba got injured in the first game and could not continue.
Speaking of controversy, an unnamed source has indicated Tomcats management may be investigating Jingles lack of attendance. Sources indicate Jingles had called ahead as required to indicate he would not be available for play, but questions are being raised regarding the true nature of that conversation. Do fans and players alike recall the Jingles gymbag fiasco of they will be here next week; I swear? Insiders know Jingles is already under the gun as a member of the “Forgetful Five” whom have yet to make good on their summer blogs.
The last similarity is that of the Skipster. Bookies are well aware that to date whenever the Skipster has played out for any team, that team has wound up not winning a single game. Sure scores are close, but he has yet to notch a ‘win’ as a player on the floor. Sure he’s got the occassional win stats against Razor, Falcon and even Hollywood (Who subbed one time in net), but he is ‘winless’ as a player. I spoke of this phenomena with Cribz, who stated, “I’ll look at the next time Skippy plays out, and if I’m aligned against him and we win, then maybe you may be into something. But until that time I think its just a coincidence – I mean Skippy doesn’t really play out too much.” Maybe so, maybe so, but this week just because of those yellow pants and that lack of luck, I say; “Skippy, you don’t get to place Yuri HANDZONMECAC”.
Yurri
