Bringers of the Beer: Sparky (24) Falcon (12) Tomcats (12)
Net Minders: Razor, Falcon, Chico
In the Line Up: Sparky, Rocky, Cribzie, Hollywood, La Bamba, Lovie, Chevy, Spinner, Jingles, The Turk, Sunny, Mez, Soupy, Snowpants, Hurricane, Stevo, and the Matador.
Not sure, but the thinking if they will be there: Crow, Junior
Out of the Line Up: The Rake, Bulldog, Killer, Skippy
On Injured Reserve: Zaba (but possibly looking at making a pre game skate and seeing how it feels)
St. Felix: The November issue of the St. Felix will be out Sunday September 29, so please take the time to review it.
NHL Hockey Draft: Lovie and Hollywood are organizing this year’s draft, Lovie is to provide lists, draft tips and pencils/pens and asks that the participants, only bring their ‘personalities’. Would love to see lots of the guys in it this year. It’s only $11 dollars!
Skinny: if it goes the way it is right now, then we have a MINI, but we have been saying that the last two weeks, and that has not been the case. BUT , since it is an NHL Hockey Draft night….and some players are returning from Europe (La Bamba and Hurricane) anything is possible. If Crow and Junior come out, two teams would have three spares and one team 2 spares. If Crow and Junior do not come out, three teams would have two spares. If Zaba plays……well you see, it is not an exact science.
Tomcats Forever!
By Harry Ballsonue
White Eagles: Falcon, Soupy, Cribzie, Snowpants, Chico, the Turk, Hollywood, Mez and Chevy
Black Falcons: Razor, Sunny, Doc, Rake, Sparky, Bulldog, Spinner, Stevo and Rocky
Week two was just as impressive as weak one, only this time, Razor (and not taking anything away from Falcon) stole the show. Razor may have had three to four highlight reel saves just in game one. Outstanding work on Razors part, and with Razor standing on his head and spitting out Cuban cigars, the Black Falcons took both games, 8-3 and 7-6. Now let me mention that the first game, even though it was 8-3, the score is not indicative of how the play went. Razor robbed Chevy on a few point blank shots, flashing the glove and catching the ball, as if he knew it was going there.
Another factor, is the soon to retire from the Tomcats as President, Stevo, who notched 6 goals on the night. Other huge goals came from Spinner, Stevo’s playing partner for the last 10 years.
“With Spinner, Sparky, Stevo and Sunny, (the four S’s) it was like playing the 1972 Russia team. The passing was incredible, you could not help but be a fan of the game and watch the passes and hell, I was the goalie they were shooting on,” indicated the Falcon.
One very interesting part on the night, was that many beers were left over, “The Tomcats don’t seem to be drinking as much” stated a disappointed Sparky, “Maybe it is still early in the season, but I hope they pick it up a bit.”
Sad state of affairs, the hockey is great, but the beer drinking has fallen down a bit. 22 beers left behind.
Cribzie on the games, “The three of them, Spinner, Sunny and Stevo, played very well together. Very frustrating playing against Gretzky, Crosby and Stamkos”.
Next week, La Bamba makes a season debut and the hockey should be a good as it was this past Wednesday, because they are Tomcats and they all know how to play the game…maybe not drink like they use to, but play the game they do know how.
Just a reminder, that next week, Tuesday October 1 the Tomcats will hold their draft for the NHL hockey pool (regular season) The cost is only $11 and everyone is welcome to participate.
One solid was that Rocky, who does not drink, brought out an 18 of MGD for the boys to enjoy. “That’s leadership”, stated The Mez, and then added, “Leadership is an action, not a position.”
Hey whilst you were watching the pretty passes, from Sunny to Spinner, to Stevo, to Spinner to Sunny to Stevo, to Sunny to Spinner, I put my Harry Ballsonue.
You would have never known there was a thing called a summer break with how the first game of the season started out; a raucous 40 minutes of hockey that featured a close 7-6 score for the victorious White River Dogs. It was almost like hockey had never ended for many a Tomcats player, and both goalies played exceptionally well. The second game saw the Black Wolves take it 4-2.
When I first arrived in the parking lot of the Kapusta I knew the night was going to be special, particularly after spying a car full of elderly ladies who were sitting knitting patiently near the players entrance door. Upon striking up a conversation with the ladies they excitedly stated they were waiting for Snowpants. Ethel the groups spokesperson commented, “I saw a picture of Snowpants from last years Christmas party – the one in which he was sporting those sexy leather pants. When I shared the photo with my group all the ladies agreed he was super yummy, and we all swore an allegiance to be Tomcats fans”. As I watched I can’t say for certain, but it certainly looked like the ladies were working on some kind of knitted lingerie; maybe to pass along upon completion to their favourite player as fan keepsake?
The ladies weren’t disappointed…. in the second game Snowpants proved his worth and assited the Black Wolves to a gritty 4-2 win. The game was really put away in the last 30 seconds with the Black Wolves up 3-2 and Snowy assisting on an empty netter that was scored by Sunny. After 80 minutes of hockey neither team could claim ultimate superiority, considering each team took a game. Doc with the Black Wolves may disagree particularly after he pointed out his hard work on the night was finally rewarded with a hard fought goal. Matador of the White River Dogs begrudgingly mumbled Doc may have gotten the better of him on a skirmish in the corner; but he was also quick to remind me of his great up close goal. Rewinding the tapes it was nice to see both players had been rewarded on what was a well battled first night of hockey.
Players may have also been very relieved to have played a regular start to the season instead of a mini tournament; and it was the lack of a mini tourny start to the season I found most interesting. I figured every Tomcat would have been out in full force. Notably absent was Beep, as we know from the St. Felix article, Beep secured a lucrative promotion in the civilian field which will affect his playing time this year and his skill set will be greatly missed on the Kapusta Kow Floor.
Speaking of players, I can’t help but note in 80 minutes – 80 MINUTES of play, both goaltenders only allowed 9 goals apiece. That’s a mere goal every 8.8 minutes; and it was really the second game in which the goalies took over; because after 40 minutes the score was a measly 4-2. The fourth goal being an empty netter. Regardless neither tender was able to clearly dominate the other as both made redonkulous saves that are liklely to be featured on top 10 countdowns nation wide.
The night ended on an high note as Stevo provided each player present with a 25th year personlized Tomcat program. It was one of the first times I ever heard it so quiet on the stage after a game as each player was engrossed with reading of Tomcat stars from yesterday; along with checkingout their own bios of course! I can only imagine what week 2 will bring and until Tuesday rolls around; Ethel – Yurri HANDZONMECAC (Sorry Snowpants – she’s frisky!)
Yurri
Black Wolves: Rake, Hollywood, Doc, Bulldog, Sunny, Snowpants, Soupy and Skippy
A very nice gesture, by Snowpants and the boys, who honoured Hollywood’s and Stevo’s dad, with a moment of silence before hockey started, I’m sure Myron’s boys will miss him dearly. Myron was watching from above as both his boys scored goals in the games.
Team White came back from a 6-4 deficit to win the first game 7-6. Then with a strong performance by Snowpants and Skippy the Black Wolves won the second game 4-2, with an empty net being scored with 5 seconds left on the clock.
Both good games and the fans loved the action.
Snowpants wears hockey pants to hockey…
“from Snowpants to Hockey Pants, he is one of a kind (still nicknamed Snowpants by the way)!
Special Tomcat Programs were handed out last night as well, if you get a chance to get one, I say get one! They are beautifully done, with several franchise players on the front and a happy Hollywood holding up the Stanley’s Cup on the back page. Photos from many years of the Tomcats lives and each individual Tomcat is mentioned in he book with a little ‘Skinny’ about the player. Some great insight by Cribzie can be read and some super thoughts by Lovie can also be looked at, as he makes 6 points of what life is like as a Tomcat. You will even find the words to “Tomcats Forever” in this all ages booklet.
Stevo reminded me, to remind you, to let him know if you cannot make it on a certain week. The more notice you give, the better it is for everyone within the organization. If you don’t call or text or email, and don’t show up, $5 dollar fine to you!
Hey, whilst you are pursuing the Tomcat Program, do you mind if I put my Harry Ballsonue….
We coulnd’t show his face as LaBamba’s wife thought he was away on business, not hanging out with Tomcats for the weekend.
Windsor Tomcats 25th season starts up Tuesday September 17, so start getting your hockey stuff together. The coast is $40 for the year and $5 dollars a night.
First week for beer is very important, and I am told that the two cases are in place and will be delivered.
If you are unable to make the first week of play, please text me or call me so that I can mark you off. If you know now you can’t play, then text me now, instead of 5:30 on Tuesday September 17.
Also, Rocky had asked five questions about you…I hope everyone has had a chance to reply to that….Rocky puts in a lot of work on the web site, and it would be the courteous thing to do, to respond and act on his email!
Please check web site from now on in for weekly reminders and possible blogs, as I hear Harry Ballsonue is back from Costa Rica, Blogger Bloggenstien is out of rehab and Yuri Handsonmycoq has his 2013-14 press card and is ready to rock out some GAA Stats.
Thanks for being you!
Stevo
Both of us would like to thank all our Tomcat friends/brothers for their texts, cards, flowers, donations and emails in regards to our fathers passing. We were touched by all the support we received but one particular moment stands out, when we both saw our Dad on the Tomcat web site being honoured. We can tell you that a tear appeared in our eyes, when we both saw that, we thank you very much for your love and support.
It was our dad who loved sports. Soccer and Hockey were his favourites, when we played ball hockey in the driveway, it was our Dad, who on many occasions, had to change the glass in the garage door, as we would have knocked it out over and over again. Eventually, he replaced it with a piece of ply wood. And yes, once in a while, with enough pleading, we could get him to go in net and try to stop our wrist shots.
His love of the game of hockey and Walt Tkaczuk, brought us to love the game too and the Windsor Tomcats are probably a result of that. Thanks once again, our Dad will be missed by both of us very much.
Hollywood and Stevo,
Our editors don’t discriminate. We actually have guys (not considered Tomcat prospects) but we respond to all correspondence.
Dear Tomcats,
I love going down on my girlfriend, but my jaw gets sore after a while. Any pointers
Tom Tennant
Tilbury, Ontario
Dear Tom,
We anomalously surveyed every Tomcat on the current roster. We received one anonymous response from the Rake who had this problem. The rest of the boys could eat pussy like it was the seventh game of the playoffs. Or until there is an outcome.
I salute your persistence Tom. Any repetitive motion will be tiring (taken from our ergonomist file). What the fuck brother, are you on comp? You obviously are not doing this right. The Tomcats provide a summer technique camp (bring your own woman, or in your case, a test dummy).
WT
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Dear Windsor Tomcats,
A buddy told me its common knowledge that women fantasize about their platonic guy friends all the time. Is this true?
Jim Blair
Toronto, Ontario
Dear Jim,
Of course it’s true. Why do you think that the Tomcats get so many letters from married women? I can’t count on how many women fantasize about Stevo and Rocky. You should be so lucky. Wear a white shirt.
WT
DearTomcat Organization;
I have recently read that Stevo is stepping down as President of the Tomcats after next year, and that Doc is being considered for the post. Let me tell you something, I have slept with both of them and Stevo is much more masterful than Doc. You need a masterful leader, one who knows what he is doing in the bedroom, like Stevo, not a guy who wants to have a dog leash put on him and lead around the room and spanked the entire time. Just saying.
Buffy Perkins,
Burke Falls, Colorado
Dear Buffy:
Ummm, hmmm……OK. Good to know.
Tomcats Org.
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Dear Tomcat Organization:
Could you guys not ask Stevo to stay on for a few more years? Offer him up something. I personally don’t know the man, but what does he like, what does he want? Go there and see if that works.
Mark Schindser
St. Paul, Minnesota (11th Province of Canada)
Dear Mark:
Stevo wants, what every man wants. Sex, sex, sex and to golf. We will try to work something out.
Tomcats Org.
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Dear Tomcat Organization:
I am a huge fan of the Tomcats and my favourite player is Hollywood, I love when he wears the bandana. I was taken back a bit when I heard he did not want to be the next leader of the Tomcats. Do you think his older, meaner brother Stevo is perhaps telling his younger, much better looking and smarter brother to not take the position? Also, are there any pictures of Hollywood just wearing his bandana?
Oksanna Strafanovsky
Winnipeg, Manitoba
Dear Oksanna:
Hollywood would make a great President and we here at the Tomcat organization are hoping that he eventually gives in and takes the position. If not him, then perhaps, Lovie, Sunny or Rocky.
As for pictures of Hollywood just wearing his bandana, we will see what we can do and post them on our web site in a few weeks.
Tomcats Org.
Thanks to all our fans for sending their questions in. Keep them coming as we have lots of answers for you
