Windsor Tomcats

By Harry Ballsonue

“No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens”
Lincoln Abraham

TEAMS:

Kamikaze Komets: Captain Kamikaze, Snowpants, Lovie, Chevy, Cribzie, Killer and Hollywood (Net Minder)
Doc’s Sturgeons: Captain Doc, Soupy, Jingles, Rocky, Razor (Net Minder), Hurricane and Chico
Sheep Dogs From Outer Space: Captain Sheep Dog, Tunzie, Matador, Falcon (net Minder), Stevo and The Turk

Hockey, I don’t mind saying was a bit rough….it is a well known fact that everyone wants to win…and score a ton of goals….everyone is competitive, but after all, when it is all said and done, it’s just Tuesday night hockey.  We really don’t need the two handers waking at sticks, we don’t need the hooking and pushing in front of the net, and we certainly don’t need players trying to take advantage of anyone, because that would be wrong and that is not what Tuesday night hockey is all about, the thinking is you should judge YOUR night on how much sweat is in your headband and not how many goals you scored, some maybe have it backwards.

Stevo asked that I quickly go over some of the rules re ‘time out play’.  There really is only two plays that a team has to wait for the other team to set up and get ready, 1) when the play is blown dead, due to a ball going out of bounds or when the ball is hit with a high stick, or if there is an injured player.  Basically anytime, there is a stoppage, the other team can make a change and get ready for the ball to be played, the second time would be 2) after a goal, it would be gentleman like and sportsmanlike of the team that got scored on to wait till everyone was ready before the ball is played. (and usually players do wait for the goalie to wipe his brow…and set for the play)

When is there no need for a ‘time out’ type play? Well that’s an easy one folks, when the goalie stops the ball and plays it into the safety zone…there is no stoppage then, the player can play it as quickly as he wants and if he does not want to, well then he has 8 seconds to move the ball, if he does not the other team gets it in the corner. (And we can see when the players from the team scurry to get into place, on plays like this….sometimes, ‘it’s just a bad line change’)

Stevo, hopes that everyone is clear on that, and he totally understands, if you go home and mark down how many goals you scored in your diary….or tell your wife, “I was great today honey on the floor, you should have seen me, I think maybe I’m ready for the NHL Babe, what do you think?”, but, he wants everyone to be mindful of what Tuesday night is all about.

For the record, the Kamikaze Komets took the tournament, and the Mini  was decided on the number of goals they scored compared to the number of goals that the Sturgeons scored, so congrats to the Komets.

3 Star Selection as Selected by La Bamba….3rd star, #55, Snowpants, 2nd star, #26 Chevy and the first star, #22 Lovie.

Lovie also gets recognized for a solid as he brought a ‘just because case’. Lovie brought a 24 of Rolling Rock, so you are the champ in our books Lovie.

As a beat writer, now blog writer of a professional team, you would think I would be in the know a great deal more and give you the reader more insight, but I am just a normal guy, doing a normal job and sometime, (if they don’t tell me and if I don’t snoop or ask, then I don’t find out), but last week, Sunny brought a case of Yuengling (American’s Oldest Brewery) I was did not find this out until later in the week, anyway, he had gone to Ohio to pick it up for the boys, now if that is not a franchise player, I don’t know what is….

Don’t forget to tell Chevy, Sunny or Snowpants if you are going to the Christmas Party this year, they need to know in order to finalize plans on menu items and the game show that Snowpants is organizing.

Chico is already in the Christmas spirit with his festive socks and shirts.

January 2015 St. Felix will be out December 1, so make sure you come to the Tomcat web site and check it out.

Hey do you think, when you are trying really hard on the Kapusta Kow Palace to make the NHL, I can put my Harry Ballsonue.

By Harry Ballsonue

“Where ever you go, you bring yourself”.

TEAMS:
Rocky’s Raccoon’s: Rocky, (Captain), the Sheriff, Soupy, the Matador, Hollywood, Jingles, Doc
Stevo’s Stingrays: Stevo,  (Captain), Beep, Chevy, Flintstone, Mayday, Skippy and Killer
Snowpant’s Snipers: Snowpants (Captain), Sunny, Lovie, Sparky, Falcon, The Turk and Kamikaze

Very good hockey at the Kapusta Kow, with Snowpant’s Snipers winning it all….it was very close….great to see close hockey like that. “It was exciting to see”, indicated Snowpants, then added, “when it came to the final game, we had to either tie or win to win it all, and we did what we had to do in the final game and won the whole thing”. Snowpants indicated.

Debut’s by May Day and Skippy had the fans on their feet.

The hockey was clean and calm, which is what you want on a Tuesday night. The Mystery man was unveiled and the Sheriff did not disappoint his team mates nor the fans…notching a goal and setting up a few more, “I wanted to play forward, but they wouldn’t let me”, indicated the Sheriff, “Oh well, I will do as I am told, I’m new to the organization”. The Sheriff was presented with two Tomcat Beer Koozie’s for his participation.

Three star Selection as selected by La Bamba, 3rd Star, # 42 The Sheriff, the second star, # 30 The Falcon and the first star, # 93 Killer. Killer had tears in his eyes as he said, “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe it, I wish the Rake was here to see it, I need my Rake, I love my Rake, I need my Rake”, Killer stated, crying like a child.

Big thanks go out to Hollywood who stepped up and played goalie when the Mini realized that they were one goalie short, thanks to Hollywood for playing goalie.

Sparky thanks the boys that helped out with the beer empties, “I am the minister of empty cans, I thank everyone who helped”, indicated Sparky.

One moment, that needs to be captured was when Snowpants was wringing out his head band, it looked like sweat, but what was it one Tomcat asked, to which Sparky responded, “that’s not sweat, it’s rye”.

Finner General Manger of the Tomcats, is organizing a ball hockey fund raiser for Movember, the event  is this Sunday at Homedale Park and it starts at 11 a.m.. Cost is $10 and Finner is hoping for three to four teams… Suggestion is that you bring your own cooler…there will be a bottle draw for $5 or $10 dollars and all proceeds are going to his Movember team.

Last week some score clock problems, were encountered,  but Sparky and Hollywood were able to make the necessary repairs so this week the clock ticked like a clock.

Sparky and Hollywood fix the clock…just in time for Tomcat hockey to rock!

Once again, I must say the hockey was very good, with good clean hockey and that is nice to see, not just by the fans but by the reporters in the press box, thanks guys, for being so great.

Please make sure you tell Sunny, Chevy or Snowpants that you are or your not coming to the Tomcat Christmas Party November 28.  The previous two years have been fantastic and the Tomcats are thinking this year will be no different.

Whilst Snowpants is wringing out his headband, could I put my Harry Ballsonue.

Click here to read the 200th edition of the St. Felix.

Howdy folks, Phillip here writing for you today. All the kids and adults alike, were dressed up for Tomcats Halloween Night!
Best costumes of the night were the HazMat Ebola suits, the illegal aliens and terrorist costumes. My personal favorite always the naughty nun in lingerie.
Plenty of those were to be seen!

Teams were even Steven last night:
The Black Bats: Soupy, Tunes, Matador, Kamikaze, La Bamba, Jingles, The Turk, with Razor between the pipes.
The White Spooks; Chevy, Hurricane, Beep, SnowPants, Sparky, Hollywood, The Rake, Cribz, in net was the Falcon.

No mini, thanks to the Hockey Gods, everyone prefers it that way. Good hockey all around with the Bats taking the first game 7-5.
It was a well fought battle,back and fourth hockey, both goalies making tonnes of saves.  When it is warm on a Tuesday outside,
proves to be warm on the inside at the Kapusta Kow Palace. Goalies were given extra media time out to refresh, and to hose and wipe off!
The spooks came back and won the second matchup 7-4. Even with the goaltenders making a phenomenal amount of saves,
last night hockey match must have been “the most blocked shots by both teams ever”!

A five gallon pail made it into the dressing room (on stage) for all of the “crush your cans”, Sparky said the interior of his Chrysler Crossfire coupe, still smells like soggy cardboard and beer, from when he takes back the empties. Speaking of empties (soon to be). Chevy presented his ‘fine case’ ,for team dipping into the cooler too early.

Some people seem to have a difficult time grasping the concept of “PLAY THE BALL”!
So here is a new feature for you all; Play the ball, in a couple of different languages!
Afrikaans; Speel die ball!
Estonian; Mangi Palli!
Cebuano; Play anga bolla!
Irish; Sienn an liathroid!
Galician;Xogar o balon!
Norwegian; Spille ballen!
Romanian: Joaca mingea!
Punjabi; Bala khedana!
Swahili; kucheza mpira!

Sounds good to me, chew on those for a while! Maybe just maybe they will sink in!
Whilst you are chewing on your kids candy, this Friday night, hopefully I will be enjoying some blonde dressed up as Elsa!
Phil Landerer wishing you a Happy All Eve of Hallows!

By Harry Ballsonue

Friedrich Jingles once stated, ” The cork is not afraid of even the greatest depth”

Kamikaze’s first mini as a Captain and he was not afraid to jump in and pick a team…. he shone like a star.  Picked a team that won it all.  Sparky on the other hand, picked all good players, but players that could not play together. Sparky’s team struggled and then struggled and then struggled some more. Chico’s team did well, but could not finish the deal….and oh, did I mention, that Sparky’s team struggled.

Kamikaze Komets: Kamikaze (Captain), Falcon, Tunes, Chevy, Cribzie and Killer
Sparky’s Edsel’s: Sparky (Captain) Lovie, Soupy, Spinner, Stevo, Hollywood and Doc
Chico’s Cheetahs’ Chico (Captain) Beep, Matador, Rocky, Jingles and Hurricane

The hockey was very calm and collective….was it because Snowpants was not in the line up, some suggested it was so.

Interesting event occurred, two games before the end, the Komet’s grab from the case of beer with games to be played, Chevy takes responsibility, “I said to the team, let’s win the next game and drink the beer and I will buy the fine case”…and they did and Chevy will.  Team Chico Cheetah’s jumped on the situation and had beer too before the final game was played….can you say gamesmanship. (NO fine for the Cheetah’s)

Skippy and Spanky never showed up, Skippy made a big production of how he was a full time player and that he wanted to play out and not in net…. and that he was bringing his beer and money for the year and….and…..and…….never showed up…….Is that Tomcat material or Skipjack material I ask you?

Spanky….unknown…no call, no show up, he still thinks it’s 1993 and you just don’t show up.

Speaking of 1993, a blast from the past, Hurricane played in net…..shut them down with Sawchuk like saves….and a Johnny Bower set of pads….and can you say Tony Esposito…(Both right hand catchers)

In the first two games, Hurricane never wore a mask but then someone told him it was 2014 and goalies wear masks, so he donned a mask…

It should be mentioned that Hurricane has played every year (At least one game in net) since the inception of the Tomcats way back in 1989.

Solid by Killer, was suppose to bring a 12…brings a 24….’put her there Killer’.

Snowpants, could not play due to a upper body injury, believed to be the right wrist, did not play, but did a super solid, by bringing Tim Bits and a bottle of rum…”Put her there Snowpants”!

Snowpants shows up looking like a cross between Sporty Spice and Jersey Shore!

The three star selection as selected by La Bamba, the 3rd star, Beep, 2nd Star, Chevy and the first star, Hurricane. “I got to tell you, I felt good in net, but, not sure if I was deserving of first star, Chevy maybe but me, no”.  A humble Hurricane indicated. And speaking of Chevy, what was that that he was wearing on his head? He started off with a touque then went to what looked like a bandanna, but was it?

What is Chevy wearing on his head? A mini inner tube?

Injury report on Stevo was that he took a ball (deflection of his own team mate shot…Spinner) to the left ear…the pain was excruciating at first, but the medical staff iced him down and he was able to finish the night.

Not in the line up next week, Skippy, Mayday, Bulldog, Crow, Rocky and Stevo…..if you know you are not able to play ahead of Tuesday, why not text Stevo and tell him. (He will text Hollywood and let him know)

Whilst you are munching down on some Tim Bits, do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue.

By Harry Ballsonue

May West once said, “Too much of a good thing can be simply wonderful”.

The quote by May West is typical of the Tomcats and Tuesday night hockey. On the floor, players try hard to out do one another, make a pass, score a goal, take a lead….but then on stage after, the laughter, the stories…..and if you stick around long enough the games get re told and rehashed.

The games were all very well played with only a few incidents, Snowpants knocking down the 190 pound Lovie and then Doc and Rake in a tug of war in the corner for the ball.

Team Rakes Roasted Road Kill take the tourney with 6 points, Doc’s Deviled Delight get 5 points and Sheep Dog’s Stuffing got one point.

The Teams this week:

Rakes Roasted Road Kill Rake (Captain) Crow, Chevy, Lovie, falcon, Hicksie, Kamikaze
Docs Deviled Delight Doc (Captain) Soupy, Sunny, Matador, Stevo, Razor, Hurricane
SheepDogs Stuffing Sheep Dog (Captain) Jingles, Snowpants, Rocky, Cribzie, Spinner, La Bamba, Hollywood

3 Star Selection as selected by La Bamba, 3rd Star Soupy, 2nd star, Kamikaze and the first star Crow, who pretty much won the tournament single handedly for the Roasted Road kill of the Rakes. New Comer, Hicksie, did very well and could have very easily been the 4th star.

LaBamba styling with a new look this year…soccer socks!

Solids by Crow for bringing 15 Bud light, just because.. Chevy gets a solid, he was suppose to bring a 12 and brought a 24…’put her there, Chevy” and to Soupy’s wife, Serta, who brought her husband, on his birthday a bottle of Crown so that the boys could toast to his birthday…more wives should be like Serta and I hope wives all over the world are reading this and saying, “Damn Girl, you are good, I need to do something like that for my man”. (Perhaps a tradition has been established)

For those keeping count at home, Snowpant’s birthday was on Monday October 12, so Happy Birthday Snowpants!

Next week, the only cancellations are Bulldog, Crow and La Bamba.

Another fantastic night of goaltending by the three netminders, Falcon, Razor and Hollywood, thanks guys….

The Three Handsome Goaltenders…wait a second, is it just me or is Razor looking a whole lot younger these days?

May Day is yet to make his debut, see if next week he is in the line up and Spanky has assured the Tomcats he will be in the line up next week…let’s wait and see.

October 21 Beer Bringers Razor 24 Killer 12

Hey…whilst you are drinking Crown Royal f room Soupy’s birthday bottle, that his wife (The Angel) Serta brought him, could I put Harry Ballsonue?

By Harry Ballsonue

The Matadors: The Matador, Chico, Snowpants, Lovie, Killer, Hollywood
The Chevy’s: Chevy, The Turk, Hicksie, Beep, Sparky, Spinner
The Pontiac’s: Tunzie, Flintstone, Sheep Dog, Soupy, Doc and Stevo

What was thought to be a two team night, ended up being a Mini. “I don’t know how that happened’ Whispered Stevo, “I thought we only had enough for two teams.”  But a mini it was and because a third goalie could not be talked into playing in net,  Falcon and Razor played net the entire time (CAN YOU SAY HOT OUT THERE IN GOALIE EQUIPMENT)

Management is stressing the importance of three goalies, for a mini especially when the weather is over 50 degrees out. Perhaps in the dead of winter, two goalies can handle the work load, but there is no reason why a Tomcat could not step up and play in net. For future reference the Tomcats carry a full set of goaltending equipment in the Tomcat room.

The play got a bit intense with some pushing and wacking going on…..once again, it is important to play the ball.

One Tomcat, left without saying good bye, due to the fact that he got knocked down on a play.  He was so disgusted that he did not even bother to stick around and participate in the NHL Tomcat Hockey Pool which he helps to organize. (The Pool went on anyway with 10 teams).

Solids: Sea Lion showed up to be involved in the NHL draft and brought a 30 pack of Molson Canadian, ‘put her there, Sea Lion’.  The Sheep Dog brought 24 MGD, ‘Just because he is a super guy’ and newcomer/showcased player, Hicksie (who has attended the Crow Summer Hockey School for Great Golfers who want to be good Hockey Players) brought a 12 of MGD….

New guy Hicksie brings 12 MGD, gets 2 Tomcat Koozies and a Tomcat Towel with # 36 “This may be the greatest day of my life ….thank you Tomcats!”

Hicksie was thanked by the Tomcats and was presented with two Tomcat Beer Koozies and a Tomcat Towel.

Matador’s team from last week provided their ‘Fine’ case for breaking into the case before the last game had ended…

So who won the tournament? Well, organizer’s decided to call it a night, without playing the final game as the goalies were exasperated and there was beer to be consumed. So all three teams were winners.

Lovie gets the nod for a Super Solid for brining out Kielbasa, Cheese and Crackers, “I love doing this for the boys and hey, who does not love going home with Double Smoked Kielbasa on their breath”?

The three star selection as selected by La Bamba, the 3rd star Snowpants, the second star Matador and the first star Tunzie (a first time Captain for the mini)  The three were selected for taking the initiative and organizing the mini and being the three Captains.

A little bit of investigative journalism, had me find out that Sparky had a different Nick Name in high school…..

Fun Fact… Before Sparky was nicknamed Sparky by the tomcats his nickname was ‘catfish’

During the NHL Draft, Sheep Dog made a pick and Chico said to him, “Do you really want to win this pool”?

Next week, not in the line up: Bulldog, La Bamba, Sparky, Spanky, May Day, if you know you can’t make it, let Stevo know.

Beer Bringer’s next week are: Hurricane 24 and Chevy 12.

This blog takes a turn to the serious side and just a reminder, that yes the NHL is watching every game that you play on the Kapusta Kow Palace, and scouts are evaluating you and large contracts could be handed out any day,  but take it easy out there and play the ball not the man, or the body, or the head or anything but the ball. Tuesday night Tomcat Hockey is suppose to be for some fun. Please keep this in mind.

And whilst you are laying on the Kapusta Kow floor wondering why no penalty was called on the hit, may I put my Harry Ballsonue?

By Harry Ballsonue

Soupy Submarines Soupy, Lovie, La Bamba Stevo Chico, Killer and net minder Hollywood
Sunny Dispositions Sunny, Beep Spinner The Matador, Net Minder Razor Jingles (no Show) Sheep dog and the Rake
Snowpants War Birds Snowpants, Rocky, Chevy, Net Minder Falcon, Sparky the Turk , Doc and Kamikaze

It is not very often that we as a hockey fan see the games that we got to witness on Tuesday and it is not often that I as the author of this blog post the scores and the standing, but due to the fact that the games were all tight and the top two teams ended up in a tie I thought it would be good to list. Now, if there was a tie breaker, then the Soupy Submarines would have won the mini…due to the head to head competition against the Snowpants War Birds.

Snowpants 1 Sunny 0
Sunny 0 Soupy 3
Soupy 3 Snowpants 3
Sunny 0 Snowpants 1
Soupy 1 Sunny 4
Snowpants 1 Soupy 2

W L T GF GA +/- Pts.
Soupy 2 1 1 7 8 +1 5
Snowpants 2 1 1 6 5 +1 5
Sunny 1 3 0 4 6 -2 2

It was a hot night at the Kapusta Kow, and the sweat glistened off all the players as they played the games that they came to play. Interestingly enough, Killer is so far the only player in the history of the Windsor Tomcats to do a ‘can opener’ on himself, he did it last night going down like a sack of potatoes.

The 3 star selection as selected by La Bamba 3rd star Razor 2nd star Hollywood and the first star Falcon (although there is a pecking order in the three star selection, it should be noted that all three net minders played fantastic and it could have been Razor as first star…..and so on.

Honourable mention goes out to Lovie who brings a 12 pack of Rolling Rock, ‘Just because he is a super great guy’

Matador, Sunny and Spinner and Razor and Jingles and Sheep Dog and Rake are fined a case of beer for going into the cooler of beer prior to the final buzzer of the final game…the rule for those not familiar, is a case of beer to be brought for the next week. If that case of beer is not presented next week, then it goes up to 2 cases of beer. The fine goes to the entire team, even if only one person breaks the rule.

So great hockey was played last night and a cold beer was well deserved by everyone on stage. Stevo asks that you keep the body work to a minimum and like he yelled a few times last night, “Play the Ball”.

Tomcats held a meeting after in regards to a two day tournament. The meeting was held only to discuss the topic and not make any decisions at this time. Many pros and cons were made and if I was a betting man, I would say that the tournament, come February will remain a one day event.

During that meeting, a question was asked about Captains and if there was a selection made at the May board of directors meeting, In doing a search on the topic I discovered that Captains were not established at that Board of Directors meeting and so today I spoke to Stevo about it, thus the delay in getting the blog up, He indicated that the Captains are to be: The Rake, Doc, Sheep Dog and Kamikaze, if they are all willing to be Captains. His thinking in regards to making two part timers Captains for the tournament is that it gets them involved even though they are not full timers. It gives them a further ownership of the Tomcat Fabric. Is there a concern that Kamikaze has never played in the big Tournament before, Stevo indicated, “No, I don’t see that at all as an issue, he has played in mini’s and he will have 7 other teammates (that he will select) on his team that can help him along. The biggest issue will be the draft selection and I feel he will have a good handle on the players available at the draft”. Stevo had concluded.

Next week the NHL Regular Season Hockey Pool is taking place, cost is $11 and everyone is encouraged to participate. “It is a team thing”, indicated Lovie (one of the organizers) and then added, “there are always some great laughs and I find it just brings the fellas together, I hope we get a lot of participants this year and I hope Snowpants goes into it for the first time”, Lovie concluded. Lovie also indicated that snacks will be brought out for the draft that will include Kielbasa and cheese and crackers.

Beer bringers next week, Chico with a 24, Lovie with a 12 and of course, Matador and his crew with a 24!

Don’t text and drive.

Hey….whilst you are selecting your NHL Team next week, while sucking done some Kielbasa and cheese, do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue

Harry will have his blog entry from last night’s action up by this time tomorrow. Stay tuned Tomcat Nation.

Click here to read the 200th edition of the St. Felix.

How’s it going folks? All is well here way high up in the press box of the Kapusta Kow Palace.

A great night of hockey seeing a specula game of hockey!

The Teams:

The Riverside Razors consisting of Snowpants, Beep, The Turk, Spinner, Kamikaze ,Hollywood and Razor between the pipes.Playing against the mighty….

South Windsor Falcons, playing for the Falcons were Chevy, Sparky, Soupy, Hurricane, Matador, and the Falcon standing tall in net.

Great hockey, games were played old school, up to seven , no timed games or periods. The Falcons ran away with game one 7-4. Good back and forth hockey until 4-4 tie, and then the Falcons turned it on and won that matchup.

Second game it was all Razors! 7-3 final.The Razor even played completely shirtless! Best shots of the night belonged to Kamikaze, who almost hit one of the windows on the wall side with one of his shots.

And the Matador having a Jinglesesque shot way high up on the curtains! No where near target.

No three star selection, but if there was one star, it was the Kamikaze for bringing beer, for no reason at all!

Spanky was to bring beer, but failed to do so, or make arrangements!

Not enjoying Beep being home, Kerri has somebody to snuggle with!

Phil Landerer!