By Harry Ballsonue
I am being told the meeting went very well, the people that attended are as follows:The Matador, Snowpants, Doc, Sunny, Beep, the Kamikaze, Rocky, Hollywood, the Sheep Dog. the Rake and Stevo.
The four team Captains for the tournament were confirmed as Beep, Tunzie, Soupy and the Matador. Big news as far as tournament goes, the games will now NOT be two 12 minute periods (playing the team only once), the games will be two-8 minute periods and you play each team twice.
As Far As Tuesday Night Hockey goes…a Ref to be in on the mini’s to watch for Tripping, pushing, called back goals etc. There is no face off after each goal, the ref, will ensure that both teams are ready and will blow the whistle to start the play…..
(Ref is to be brought in for only the Months of September and October) to see if it helps with the ‘rougher’ play. If the Rake cannot play due to injuries, he is willing to be the ref. Sea Lion and the Bundura maybe asked as well to come out. If they are not able to, then the team on stage will send a ref in to ref.
Banner to get a quick ceremony and Hollywood and Snowpants are in charge of that.
Part time player list in the order of call up: Tunzie, Kamikaze, Green Giant, Shack (special Status as a goalie), Sheep Dog, Flintstone and Hicksee.
Shack is confirmed as full time third goalie, but still remains as a part time player.
Out Door game cancelled for next year. Tomcats will end the year at the Kapusta Kow Palace…(amongst Tomcats)
Soupy to do the beer list this year.
June 20’s Baseball game came under some fire, and that is to be looked at further by Soupy and Chico.
Tomcats donated $25 to the Golf Tournament for a prize.
Possible addition to the Tomcat room will be some inexpensive shelving units so that empties and beer can be stored neater.
Jingles to head up a ‘Tomcat Survey’…..more information to follow.
New nets are to be looked at, as the old nets are getting very tired. Rocky to arrange.
Doc is in charge of a ‘Maintenance Day’ at the Kapusta Kow Palace. He will be looking for assistance in cleaning up the floors and bolting in the metal base boards along the walls. An August date is being looked at and Doc will be reaching out for assistance.
Hollywood is to secure the ‘BIG SILVER BOX’ on stage (no not some old peeler) but the box that is right behind the Falcon, it will hold the score clock, so it does not have to be carried up and down the stairs.
Sheep Dog is to arrange a bowling night sometime in the fall with Tomcats and their wives/girlfriends.
Some clarification to ‘rules’ were brought up and the St. Felix will be giving those out in further detail, so watch for that in the summer issue.
Acknowledgements to some of the Tomcats for ‘above and beyond’ work, Rocky, Snowpants, Razor, Jingles and Sparky.
And………..
Sunny is the only Tomcat to have two Nick Names (Sunny and Husky Eyes), now Snowpants too has that dubious distinction, you are allowed to call him Snowpants or ‘Pantalon de Neige’. Congrats Snowpants.
Hey while you are smiling to yourself about the Pantalon de Neige name, do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue?
By Harry Ballsonue
“Life is not measured by how many breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath” Anonymous
I watched as the guys sat on stage on the last night of hockey for the 2014-2015 season. You could see them undress from their wet soggy clothing and put on dry clothing as they chugged down their first beer of the night. “Boy that first one always goes down so quick and tastes so good” says the Matador.
Then there were the hot dogs that The Rake cooked up. You are a good man Rake for coming in and doing that. The boys love the Rake and of course engage him in all sorts of conversations.
Camaraderie….Webster’s describes it ‘as a feeling of good friendship among the people in a group’. I think there should be a picture of the Tomcats on stage beside the word in the dictionary !
It was great to see The Rake bring toppings for the dogs and Snowpants brought chips and salsa and cheese. The boys would take turns asking “Need another beer…..Need another one”?
Friendships, smiles…camaraderie.
We the press, were let in almost right after the final game was played, I got to hear Stevo as he was giving his ‘end of the season’ speech….it was about welcoming new comers Shack and the Green Giant and embracing them as their own. Both had appreciative smiles on their faces, you could sense happiness throughout the stage as he mentioned their names (Shack has a tiny cut, just above his left eye thanks to an errant Hurricane stick).
It was a nice touch by the Tomcats to award a Fedora’s to the last three stars of the Season. Sunny, Soupy and Beep donned their fedora’s and Soupy talked about how he planned on wearing it on the golf course this summer. Soupy brought a bottle of Crown ‘just because’ and more and more of that is done by the Tomcats…guys bringing 24 instead of 12…Nice to see stuff like that.
On Skippy
I spoke to Stevo yesterday about Skippy’s status with the Tomcats and asked him if Skippy has been released completely. Stevo laughed and said, “No, not at all. Skippy’s numbers were down as far as coming out (Not GAA as far as Stevo knows) and due to the fact that we have more mini’s then nights with just two teams, I am always scrambling looking for a third goalie. Shack fits the bill. He is available.
On any given Tuesday and is equal (talent wise) to the Falcon and the Razor. It just makes good hockey sense to have Shack as our third goalie.” Skippy I was told, will still get to come out and play whenever he can, and on those nights, Shack will either be taken out of the line up or will play out. That is another beautiful part of Shack, is that he plays in net and is also a very good player out too. Shack remains a part time player….

Skippy is not totally out of the Tomcat line up for 2015-16. His playing time was down and the Tomcats need someone to be the third net minder, so Skippy is relegated to part time (where he kind of was anyway) and Shack is brought in as the third goalie.
On the Banner
Really cool thing that Hollywood did in organizing the Tomcat Banner. It will be discussed at the Board of Directors meeting and Stevo is looking for a couple of people to step up and give it a proper ceremony. “Maybe they can do a video of the past and show it on the Jumbo-tron and the theme from Rocky can be played while the slideshow or video is played…or Maybe Snowpants can just make a speech” Stated Cribzie.
Too Many Sticks

’71 sticks….some need to be given away, some need to be used to hold up tomato plants and some need to go to the Hockey Hall of Fame
I leave you with a short story that a cop friend told me the other day…
A man calls 911 and says, “I think my wife is dead.” The operator says, “How do you know?” He says, “The sex is about the same, but the ironing is piling up!”
Hey, while you are chuckling to the Police story, do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue.
Bring your Bats, Gloves, and Balls! We are having our 1st Annual Windsor Tomcats/Minx 2-Pitch Game! Backed by popular demand, we are going to play baseball this year instead of volleyball!
The date is Saturday June 20, at 3 PM at Optimist Centre Park (behind the library) in Tecumseh. We will then head over to Stevo’s for some drinks, bbq, and shenanigans!
All Tomcats and Wives are encouraged to attend, as it is sure to be awesome day! The teams will be co-ed, mixed and will be decided that day.
If interested in playing, Let either Soupy or Chico know via txt or email at
(519) 982-6882, samuel.salaris@gmail.com or aaron_w79@hotmail.com
Looking forward to seeing everyone out!
By Harry Ballsonue
“There is only one good, Knowledge, and one evil, Ignorance”
Socrates
Teams:
Matador Greens Matador as the Captain, Chevy, Snowpants, Chico. Hurricane, Hollywood and Razor
Tunzie Fairways Tunize as the Captain, Beep, Flintstone, Green Giant, Jingles, Killer, Kamikaze and the Shack
Rocky Rough Rocky as the Captain, Sunny, Soupy, Stevo, Falcon, The Turk and Doc
The Kapusta Kow was warm and the play was hot.
Three Star selection, as selected by La Bamba, the third star # 39 Chico, the second star #15 Flintstone and the first star, # 30 the Falcon.
Solids by Hurricane, as he was to bring a 12 but brought 24 beers. Also, the Turk, fined himself and brought a 12 for calling in late last week! Both of these Tomcats have 26 years with the Tomcats and solids they are performing…put’er there boys!
It should also be mentioned, that Stevo, reached into the cooler before the tournament was over and handed out beers to the Rocky Rough teammates, meaning that he was been fined a case of beer. This case of beer is to be paid on the first night of hockey in September.
The Bundura, had indicated that he would be coming to the Draft and even inquired what kind of alcohol to bring. It was suggested that Rye would be a great idea (and to bring coke a cola too and the Tomcats would supply cups). Interestingly enough, he never showed!
Winner of Regular NHL Hockey Pool
Congats to Soupy for winning the pool.
Second place tie, Chico and the Sea Lion.
Third Sheep Dog…other notables…..Sparky, Razor, Lovie, Matador and then Stevo (And Stevo is the President of the Tomcats???)
Just as the playoffs are starting, Coach Sea Lion and a few of the Tomcats went to Kentucky on a four day golf trip. They are looking at doing it again next year, if that is something that you think you would like to do next year, let the Sea Lion know. “The courses were beautiful, the trip was a great deal of fun. The Bourbon and Pepsi’s were tasty, so If you love to golf, this trip is for you”, Sea Lion.

Sea Lion organized 4 great days of golf in Kentucky.
The boys loved the courses …the weather and
Even took out some time to enjoy some Bourbon !

Cribzie stands at the tee box of the signature hole
Of a course called ‘Old Silo’……get your eyes off the handsome and dreamy Cribzie and check out the Silo !
April 21 Mini
Don’t forget. last night of hockey is on April 21 and a mini (or a maxi FOUR TEAMS ) could be played on that day. Stevo did take a head count, to see who was in ‘for sure-for sure’, but if you were not there and you plan to play the please text Stevo and let him know, “Hey, I’m in for the 21s of April”. There is some planning that has to go into it, so a headcount is required.
Playing: Bearcat (If a fourth goalie is needed) Shack, (Playing out) Stevo, Flintstone, Snowpants, Turk, Soupy, Matador, Beep, Green Giant, Hurricane, Chevy, Tunzie, Razor, Jingles, Falcon, Skippy, Cribzie, Sheep Dog, Crow and Doc
Out: Chico, Killer, La Bamba, Rocky
Possible Players: Sol, Big Ned
NHL Playoff Pool
Lovie the Minister of the Interior and Hockey Pools, came through and did a fantastic job in organizing the NHL Play Off Hockey Pool, predicted to finish first….Hurricane, with a strong selection of players, number two, Tunzie and the third place finish will go to Lovie.
Board of Directors Meeting……you are invited!
The Board of Directors, once again this year, are opening the meeting up to ALL Windsor Tomcats, full time and part time. Only stipulation is that you let Stevo know that you are going to go (Food and Beverages are provided) so that he can plan accordingly. The meeting takes place at his house….at 6pm Sharp on Tuesday May 5, 2015. If you want to attend and listen in or give your two cents worth on the season and hear what the Board has to say or listen to the Financial Perspective, then let Stevo know.
Tomcat Golf May 29 10 a.m. start.
If you have not already spoken to the Minister, of Fireworks, Golf and Shenanigans, Snowpants…please consider doing so, the cost is only $38. for golf with a cart and the celebration is to be held right there at Fox Glen. The ‘all you can eat perch’, is the way you want to go after…yum yum…..See Snowpants today, don’t delay! Golf Hotline 519.977.4929 (Text today).
Young Tomcats in the Hood
‘Sol, wanted to make an impression on the Tomcats and started up a Charity called, ‘Kids doing for Kids’….he got Big Mac his first ever hockey stick. “I know my Dad (Doc) is the best Tomcat ever to play for the Tomcats, He tells me this all the time, he says ‘Beep Shmeep’ and Sunny Bunny, I leave them in my tracks….I hope to be as good as him one day” indicated Big Mac.

Sol ( Sunny’s Kid ) got a stick done up for Big Mac ( Doc’s boy ) Sol …a first round pick is doing work in community helping kids ….Sol will get to play on April 21 .
Whilst, you are studying the Socrates phrase and pondering some other quotes that you might know from Pythagoras, or Muhammad, would you mind if I put my Harry Ballsonue?
By Harry Ballsonue “Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.” Douglas Adams Teams: Tunzie Terminators Captain Tunzie, Falcon, Rocky, Chevy, Sparky, Snowpants, Kamikaze, Beep and Chico Cribzie Skynets Captain Cribzie, Shack, Spinner, The Matador, Green Giant, Stevo, Killer, Soupy and the Hurricane
2 teams and Junior you would have loved it! Hockey was most excellent. Intense, with some pugnacity, truculence and a small dose of belligerence. Both teams looked equal on paper, but the zig zagging Snowpants and dancing bear Chevy put on a show of NHL preportions. Both Snowpants and Chevy captured the hearts of the Tunzie Terminator fans, notching goal after goal after goal. Solid goaltending on the Terminators side also lead them to taking the first game 8-4 and the second game 5 to 3. Now don’t get me wrong, just because Shack let in 13 goals does not mean he was out of sinc. On the contrary, he was great, but the Terminators seemed to be able to find the back of the net on a number of occasions. The lone shining star on the Skynets was the Green Giant. He notched 6 of the 7 goals that the Skynets scored. There was no Three star selection, but if there was, La Bamba, would have been awarding them this way: the 3rd star, # 77 The Green Giant , the second star # 55 Snowpants and the first star, # 26 Chevy.
Still no HARD count, has been made for the April 21 night, (Last night of hockey) the thinking is, that if a Maxi is to be played on the 21st, then the Tomcats will go with next year’s tournament Captains, the Matador, Tunzie, Beep and Soupy. Stand by for that! Sometimes past Tomcats will appear in the news, and the Tomcat Web Site and the St. Felix will comb through the available information and post it here on t e web site. Example, Fuzzy, to become lead singer of the Blow Fish, leaving Hootie behind. Bucko, to have his own clothing line and Crispy a one time franchise player of the Tomcats……

ex Windsor Tomcat is making news ….he was triple crown winner this year…..”best looking in black under armour shirt”…” Most handsome Tomcat ever ” ( sorry Jingles & Rocky) and “Pretty damn good hockey player “. Crispy will be joining fellow Tomcats in the Tomcat golf tournament once again this year !
April 21 Mini Don’t forget the out door game is cancelled, but a mini (or a maxi FOUR TEAMS ) could be played on that day, April 21. If you know already that you are in, please text Stevo and let him know, “Hey Stevo, I’m in for the 21s of April”. There is some planning that has to go into it, so a headcount is required. NHL Playoff Pool April 14, (next weeks hockey) Lovie the Minister of the Interior and Hockey Pools, will be stepping up with the NHL Playoff Pool. Cost is $11 and he will be supplying everything. Draft sheets, player lists and nice pens that you can re-gift for Mothers Day. Tomcat Golf May 29 10 a.m. start. If you have not already spoken to the Minister of Fireworks, Golf and Shinanigans, Snowpants…please consider doing so, the cost is only $38. for golf with a cart and the celebration is to be held right there at Fox Glen. The ‘all you can eat perch’, is the way you want to go …yum yum…..See Snowpants today, don’t delay! Golf Hotline 519.977.4929 (Text today) Board of Directors Meeting The Board of Directors are once again, opening the year end Board of Directors meeting to all members (full and part time). The meeting will be held at Stevo’s place on May 5, and the meeting will start at 6pm sharp if you are planning on attending, please let Stevo know, so that the proper amount of food and beer can be on hand. Basically, DON’T JUST SHOW UP, let Stevo know if you are going to go to the meeting. Hey, whilst you are trying to figure out why the names, of the Terminators and the Skynets are all about, (Arnold Schwarzenegger Terminator theme…FYI), do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue?
April Fools Day by HARRY BALLSONUE
“Fat bottom girls, they make the rockin world go round”
Queen
Teams
Stevo Stingrays Captain Stevo, Sunny, Chevy, Green Giant, Flintstone, Shack and the Kamikaz
Jingles Jets Jingles, Captain, Soupy, Tunzie, Hollywood, La Bamba, Doc and the Razor
Snowpants Fury Snowpants, Captain, Beep, Sparky, Hurricane, The Turk, Falcon and the Sheep Dog
Hockey was excellent and controversial. The Stingrays took the Mini, by beating the Jingles Jets in their final game. That part was exciting hockey, the controversial part occurred when the Snowpants Fury scored a goal and the Jingles Jets did not think it went in. 3 Players on stage called it in and one did not. Stevo working the clock, determined that in a 3 to one ratio, that it should be counted as a goal. That made the score 3-1 for the Jets. They were still leading by two goals….well you know what Don Cherry says, its the worst lead in hockey and the Jets proved him right by losing 5-3. Did that one controversial goal make that big of difference that saw The Fury score 5 unanswered goals? Five goals?? If the Jingles Jets scored one more goal, and made it 4-1 you might not have had Hollywood yelling “NOOO GOOOALLLLL”……”NOOOOO GOOOOALLLL” in a continued annoying unsportsmanlike way, every time a goal was scored after that.
The Jets were rattled and then, with the tournament all theirs, they lost to the Stingrays in the final. “Where I have an issue, is that you have three players who are on the black team and they want white to win…that is the issue for me,” Jingles stated in a disgusted manner.
Controversial night? I would say so. How do you solve that? Bring in a ref? What would he have done, he would have gone to the four sitting on the stage and asked them what they saw and would have counted it a goal….3 to one vote….right?
Controversy and the Matador was not even there!
Stevo indicated, “Why did I have to be working the clock at that moment. I did not see if it went in. Hurricane scored it, the three on stage said it went in. Do we need a designated goal judge? Maybe the Board of Directors can figure out over the summer what to do on calls like that….what do I care if it went in or not…..”.. Stevo concluded.
3 weeks left…Sea Lion will be asked to come out on the very last night of hockey…..don’t need players pouting…and crying and leaving the stage early in a huff. We are all brothers….
Three Star Selection, as selected by La Bamba, third star, # 29 Razor. the second star # 21 Tunzie and the first star, Et la Premiere etoile # 27 Shack.
Doc hosted a party on Saturday and a couple of Tomcats attended, with one of them being Soupy (a fan favourite) Soupy sang a version of “Pour Some Sugar On It”,
I am being told, that would have made you cry. A goal scorer and a rock star.
Next week, Soupy is playing in net…..you certainly do not want to miss that.

Preppy Rocker Soupy poses back stage with his band after blowin’ the doors off “Pour Some Sugar on Me.”
Hollywood, AKA Brozzer is starting up a mechanical shop……

Broser s automotive ?? Is this another April Fools joke by Hollywood ….is he really a mechanic and not a hot tub guy ?
OUT DOOR GAME : I was following a lead, to confirm that the out door game was to be cancelled and then the pesky Tomcats released a press release. Everyone is being asked to cancel anyone (from outside the Tomcat circle) they asked and the Tomcat Tuesday night on April 21 will be just that, a Tomcat Tuesday night. Food is also being planned after hockey as the boys sit around one last time and have a drink with the guys and say their good byes until May 29 when they see each other again for Tomcat Golf!
Stevo stated that if we have more then our usual amount of guys for the 21st of April, that he will summon a fourth goalie and make four teams with a start time of 6pm that day…..(Start time at Lansberry was for 6 pm anyway……). Bearcat Meloche had indicated that he would like to be the fourth goalie and can play on that night. Also Tomcats are looking at calling up Sol and Big Ned from the minors for that game if they need to round out the teams. Sol is Sunny’s son and Big Ned is Stevo’s boy. Also for those following the line up for that night, Crow has indicated that he would be coming out on that night.
More information will be made available as the weeks follow, so Stevo is suggesting you keep your eye on the Tomcat web site and to check your emails as well. A head count will be taken, so that it is known how much beer and hot dogs will be required.
It was Falcon bobble head night and 3 lucky fans got to meet Falcon and ask him one question each…..Moe asked, “What does it mean when they say you flash the leather”?
Curly asked, “What does the ‘five hole’ mean”? and Larry asked, “Are you the best dad ever”?
Hey, whilst you are cancelling you buddies for the out door game and thinking how many hotdogs you might eat on stage on the 21st of April, do you think
when you have that wiener in your mouth, I could put my Harry Ballsonue?
By Harry Ballsonue
“The screen door slams, Mary’s dress waves, Like a vision she dances across the porch
As the radio plays. Roy Orbison singing for the lonely, Hey that’s me and I want you only
Don’t turn me home again. I just can’t face myself alone again”
Bruce Springsteen
Teams:
Snowpants Fury: Snowpants (Captain) Sparky, La Bamba, Shack, Doc, Killer, Chevy, Spinner, Soupy, Kamikaze (Game two)
Sunny Stingrays: Sunny (Captain) Cribzie, Kamikaze (Game one) , Hollywood, Danish, Hurricane, Green Giant, Turk, Rocky and Stevo (Game two)
Hockey proved good, with the Snowpants Fury winning it by scores of 9-2 and 9-6. When the other team scores 18 goals and you score only 8, well…you are not going to win.
I thought we gave La Bamba too much room out there to move the ball, he is the most Cerebral player out there and you just can’t give him that much time” Indicated Captain, Sunny.
“Shack saved our bacon a few times, goaltending wins championships, and man oh man, did Shack ever play great to keep us in the games” indicated Snowpants.
“There was this one Fury, that the Stingrays had”, smiled Sparky, “They must of had 7-8 shots and wacks at the ball and Shack made every save, everyone, except for the one, that bounced out to the top of the key and Hollywood zinged it in, but, 7 saves, one after the other, Shack was unbelievable” concluded Sparky.
No three star selection, but if there was, the number one star, Et la Premiere etoile, # 27, Shack.
After having scored two goals in the first game, Doc had to leave the game, with an undisclosed lower body injury. The Fury then traded a 3rd round pick for Kamikaze and Stevo was inserted into the line up for the Stingrays.
Lovie, who had a lower body injury himself to content with (believed to be a groin injury) reffed the games and made some good calls and dropped the ball at center effectively.
There are only three nights left, March 31, April 7 and April 14.
Solid goes out to Soupy for bringing a 24 instead of just a 12.
NHL Playoff Hockey Pool: Lovie is to organize the event and will be establishing the date of the draft sometime soon, so if you are interested, have your $11 ready and be ready to pick a team.
Out Door Game: You are reminded, to let Chico know, if you plan to play in…. or bring guys to the out door game. It goes Tuesday April 21, 2015 at that is a 6pm start. There is a sign up sheet at the Kapusta Kow…if you signed it, then you are fine and don’t need to get a hold of Chico.
Tomcat Golf Tournament: Fox Glen, May 29 (Friday) tee offs start at 10 a.m. Cost is only $38 for golf and a cart and then the celebration is at Fox Glen after. Please let Snowpants know if you are planning on going. Its a fun day….and the day will be beautiful, 81 degree’s with a slight breeze and one cloud in the sky, the shape of a baby elephant.
And if I ever forget to add my tag line to the end of a blog update, hopefully the editors at WindsorTomcats.com will notice while I put my Harry Ballsonue!
Tomcats Forever












