Windsor Tomcats

By Management:

After a  week and half off, after the Tournament, the Tomcats were back at it….

Good hockey all around nice to see the boys…Not sure what happened to El Choppo. Never showed, no phone call or text.

The Last Night of Hockey will be April 17, Tomcats will be providing a food item, The Rake is cooking something up, you don’t want to miss it. That is only 6 weeks away.

Next week is March Break, if you are unable to play let Sparky know.

Snowpants has set the date for the Tomcat Golf Tournament, another date, you just do not want to miss, Friday June 15, 2018 details to follow, that is only 14 and half weeks away.

Some Tomcat Members of Ghost Crossing, Rocky, Jingles, Doc’s Wife Joad The Toad, Hollywood and Stevo are going to be playing at the Lions Head Wednesday March 21, March 28 and April 4. They are on stage, 7pm to 11 pm and are asking for your support, come on out and buy a beer and cheer as loud as you can, maybe get on the dance floor and do a boot street boogie.

Tomcats Forever !

Beer Bringers March 6: Doc (24) Soupy (12)

In the Line up:
Goalies: Falcon, Terror, Skippy

Playing Out: Stevo, Cribzie, Snowpants, Kamikaze, The Rake, Jingles, Bulldog, The Turk, Sparky, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, El Choppo, The Matador, Slim Jim

Not In Line Up: Hollywood, La Bamba, Sheep Dog, May Day, Doc, Spinner, Killer, Chico

On the Injured Reserve: Beep, Hurricane, Rocky, Tunzie, Tonto

NOTE: March 13 is March Break….You can ask your child to play but they must be over 15 years old, Please let Stevo Know, if you plan on bringing your kid out. ALSO it is March break, so let Stevo know if you are playing or not.

IF YOU SEE YOUR NAME IN THE LINE UP….and it is not suppose to be there, then Please, text Stevo and let him know. He is not a mind reader.

IMPORTANT: TUESDAY MARCH 6 hockey starts at 6:30pm

Beer Bringers For March 13: Terror (24) Scuz (MVP) (12)

By Dick Fitzwell
March 1, 2018.
The Chevy Shockers were crowned the 2018 Stanley’s Cup champions on February 24, 2018 at the Kapusta Cow Palace.
Chevy’s Shockers, who had two father and son combinations playing in this year’s tournament were no match for the rest of the teams vying for the fabled cup. Led by Ned and Tweety Bird, the young guns gave the Shockers all the speed and goal scoring, whilst the wily veterans took care of the rest. Scuz was solid in net. Chevy was presented with both the Stanley’s Cup and the Finner Trophy. He won the Finner award for his outstanding contribution to both the Windsor Tomcats and the community. Congratulations Chevy.

At the after party, which was held at Stevo’s, a new Canadian Production company was spawned. The name of the company is Shocker Productions and it will produce entirely Canadian porn movies.

The initial production is a tastefully done porn movie with a hockey theme. The movie will be called HIGH DICKING. The hockey themed movie will be picked up by Canadian cable companies offering movies on Venus and is sure to be a ball buster.

High Dicking will be shot at the WFCU Centre in Windsor, Ontario and the movie will feature real referees calling real hockey penalties. This is a hit in the making. The movie will also feature Cherry Busters Corner with porn legends Buster Cherry and host Stormy Daniels providing intermission commentary and entertainment.

This is porn with rules. Real hot Canadian babes, real penalties during action. Watch the real refs call real penalties such as:
– High Dicking (of course)
– Dripping
– Butt ending
– Too many men
– Holding
– Hooking
– Slashing
– Illegal head contact
– Cumming in crease
– Shooting after the whistle
– Illegal entry from penalty bench
– Dick contact with goaltender
– Leaving crease during altercation
– Use of electronic devices
– Spearing
– Offside
– Not surrendering dick for measurement
– Charging
– Charging for behind
– Playing with more than one dick
– Playing with a broken dick
– Misconduct
– Gross misconduct
– Fighting
– Boarding
– Improper line changes during stoppages
– Refusing to start play
– Improper substitution
– Instigating
– Third man in

And more. This is what Canada has wanted. Release date will be scheduled the day after pot becomes legal in Canada. Actresses and Actors currently being auditions at college and university campuses nationwide.
The movie will also feature cameo appearances from Tomcat legends, past and present, including the Legend. Tomcat referees Sea Lion and the Bundura will be offering porn reffing at their yearly summer refereeing school.

The director of the movie, Fox Mulder, promises fan interaction like never seen before. Also, a full line of clothing and paraphernalia will be available for purchase. Don’t miss out on this future award winning production.

Fore check, back check, pay check.
Find out more at www.highdicking.com.

By Harry Ballsonue

The Chevy Shockers won the Stanley’s Cup this year, Congrats to the Shockers.

Yor Handsonmycock (A fellow so called journalist) made bold predictions but was off once again. Oh well, he tries.

Looking through some Tomcat Records, you will note that with Chevy winning this years tournament, he now has 8 Stanley Cups, tied with wiley veteran Bulldog.

At 7, Sparky,

At 6 The Eagle, Flacon, Stevo and the Rake. ( I am only listing active members)

Rocky is at 5 as is Spinner.

At 4, Razor, May Day, Hollywood, Hurricane, Crow, and Killer

At 3, Doc, Soupy, Snowpants.

At 2, The Turk, Jingles, Sunny, Skippy, Cribzie

at 1, Bundura, Sea Lion, Matador, Chico, Beep, El Choppo, the Terror, Tunzie, Tweetie Bird, Skuz and Big Ned.

If there are some errors made here, then please feel free to let me know.

I would like to compliment all the players on a great tournament, everyone could have won ‘Most Gentleman Like’ player this year. 37 Tomcats in the Full Team Tomcat photo, that speaks volumes, 35 guys standing on stage enjoying beers and many laughs, that speaks even a bigger volume and the 34 Tomcats breaking bread, in the Tomcat Club, what a brotherhood, Tomcats Forever!

Tomcat Selfie

TRADE DEADLINE

As in previous years, the Trade Deadline came and went on Monday, Feb 26, teams (like they always do) enquired about The Rake, (He was the only Tomcat anyone called about) but like every year, the Tomcats said, “ He will not be traded for anyone “. “He is a franchise player and there were no franchise player offers made”, stated GM Finner.

While you are sipping from your first Stanley’s Cup do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue

Just like Christmas comes but once a year, so does The Annual Tomcat Tournament.  Each year, on the last Saturday of February, the Tomcat organization shows up early to the Kapusta Kow for a day full of action, drinking and camaraderie. This year was no exception.

As games are played, the other teams watch the action and enjoy good banter.

Pit Bull stopped by to enjoy the festivities. Drake was supposed to make an appearance but ended up staying in Monaco for another week.

TheTomcats are strictly against toplessness…when it comes to Chico at least.

Four solid teams were chosen back in January by captains El Chopo, LaBamba, Cribzie and Chevy.

The Tournament Captains…El Chopo, La Bamba, Cribzie and Chevy

In the end, it was Chevy’s Shocker that took the tournament with 4 convincing wins.

2018 Stanley’s Cup Champions…Chevy’s Shockers

Tweetie Bird, son of The Eagle, gets his first sweet taste of victory…drinking from Stanley’s Cup is a first time ritual for all Tomcats.

Scuz takes his first drink from Stanley’s Cup

After the championhip game was played, awards were given out.  For his consistent net minding all day long, Scuz was chosen after lengthy deliberation.  It was not easy for the MVP Panel to decide as Big Ned, Stevo’s son, and Stevo himself were considered for the award.  AN speaking of Stevo, this was Stevo’s first Stanley’s Cup victory in 14 years.  It was good to see the former President win the big one again.

Scuz, goalie for Chevy’s Shockers wins the MVP Award.

The Most Gentleman Award was given to the Big Easy.  He played hard all day but displayed sportsmanship in every step…a big guy with a gentleman’s approach!

As well, the rarely awarded Finner Award was given to Chevy for purchasing golf shirts for the Tomcat Golf league.  It is that kind of spirit that makes the Tomcats a great organization.

Chevy is awarded the Finner Award for his generosity to fellow Tomcat golfers.

Razor, the Tomcat goalies of goalies, was in attendance and his retirement celebrated.  The Tomcats were fortunate to have the Razor between the pipes for so many years.

Funny Quote of the Day – Sea Lion, while reffing the games, lost the little ball inside his whistle and need to find another whistle.  Chevy, not missing the opportunity yelled, “Hey Se Lion, you’re supposed to blow into the whistle, not suck on it!”

Special thanks go out to the following Tomcats who made this day possible…remember, while many guys are able to just show up and play, there is a group of guys working feverishly behind the scenes in order for the day to go off without a hitch.  In no particular order…

Hollywood – For coming up with the tournament shirts – great colour combo this year! He also handles the team shirts.

Turk and Zaba – Getting the pizza ordered and delivered on time

The Danish – For bringing Crown Royal for the boys – Actually, having his wife deliver it during the tournament!

The Rake – Brought out sausage and cheese to share

Bundura and Sea Lion – Once again coming out to help ref and time keep/goal judge.  A thankless job as everyone gets all over them for their calls.

Stevo – For stepping up post-retirement to help run the Tomcats with Rocky injured for the season.

Finally, Doc and Kamikaze for being the two key people organizing and running the tournament…they line up the players, find goalies, secure the refs, make sure we have prizes, etc.  They do not get enough credit for their efforts.  Thanks boys!

Tuesday night hockey, First game was 12 to 3 for White, then 15 to 6 for black in the second game…..interesting.  Everyone was gearing up for the tournament.

The Stanley’s Cup Tournament starts at 8:30 this Saturday morning .  Please be on time or be early to help set up, fill coolers, put out chairs etc.  Don’t ask what the Tomcats can do for you, ask what you can do for the Tomcats.

Big thank you goes out to the Rake who stopped by with food for the boys even though he was not playing.

Tomcats bought cheese, crackers and Kielbassa for the boys. It was a big hit.

Colours for the Tournament:

Chevy: Green or Yellow

El Choppo: White

La Bamba: Red

Cribzie: Black

First game is El Choppo vs. Cribzie

Tomcats providing beer and spirits through out the day but please drink responsibly.

Pizza will be delivered at 2 p.m. Please pay $10 to the Turk as he is collecting.

$20 to your captain for the tournament, the new Tomcat long sleeve shirt is super sweet and YOU will love it.

The Windsor Tomcats can’t emphasize enough that the tournament is all about having a beer after, no scouts all be there, you will not be traded on Monday (NHL Trade Deadline day) you will still be the same person you are today.

There is no hockey on February 27.  We resume play again, Tuesday March 6, 2018 and that is a 6:30 start.  IF you know you can’t make it that night, please let Stevo know now.

Tomcats Forever,

I imagine some were getting a bit worried and thinking I would not make another tournament prediction; considering last year blew up in my face. Personally I think my prediction lit up the eventual winning team; as I had not factored them into the finals at all. One thing is for certain; this years tourny is likely to feature a whole new batch of ‘rookies’ drinking from the ‘Stanley’s Cup’. Another apparent fact – this tourny will lack the BIG name and Vegas odds goalie favourites of Falcon and The Terror; which is why it took me so long to make a prediction. Another wrinkle was the fantastic drafting of all teams by the tournament Captains; some of who are making their first appearance as Team Tournament Captains. Great drafting and planning aside; only one team will taste the sweetness of calling themselves Champions; and I make the bold prediction the Chevy Red Devils and El Choppo Tunnellers will duke it out in the finals. My bet is on El Choppo as I believe the team simply has the better goalie – or do they? I say this as I suspect Chico will get the nod to don the pads; and if that is the case my money is on him. I have seen Chico in net before and he has the goods to lead a team all the way. Chevy has Skuz; who’s been in between the twine a number of times already this year; but I just think Chico as a true butterfly goalie will be the harder one to beat and by default the goalie to bring it home.

I looked at the schedule and think the scores/winners will be as follows:

El Choppo Vs Cribzie Kings = El Choppo 5-3
La Bamba Vs Chevy = Chevy 6-2
Cribzie Vs La Bamba = TIE (4-4)
Chevy Vs El Choppo = Chevy 4-2
Chevy Vs Cribzie = Chevy 4-1
La Bamba Vs El Choppo = El Choppo 6-2

CHAMPIONSHIP GAME = Chevy Red Devils Vs El Choppo Tunnelers. El Choppo takes it 5-3

So, if this is like previous predictions the Cribzie Kings and La Bamba Gatos Dos Lobos will be making sure to do everything possible to show they are NOT to be discounted; and I likely will be wrong in my predictions once again. For the record I’m just over 65%; at least with respect to predicting the two teams who make it to the finals. At the end of the tourny will anyone even care? I mean cool new shirts, beer, pizza and hanging with a great bunch of guys for a very low cost is one hell of a way to spend a day.

While your thinking ‘Yuri, you don’t know shit about hockey’; I noticed your wife has her HANDZONMECAC.

Yurri

Last Week Before the Tournament: Just reminding everyone that this is the last week before the tournament, the tournament starts at 8:30 Saturday February 24, 2018. The tournament is for fun and a few beers after. We are being told, NO NHL SCOUTS WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE.

Beer Bringers: Matador (24) Sunny (24)

Net Minders: Falcon, The Terror, Skuz

In The Line Up: Cribzie, Spinner, Snowpants, Kamikaze, Stevo, Jingles, Sheep Dog, The Turk, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, El Choppo, The Matador, Tonto, Killer, Sparky, Tweetie Bird, The Eagle, Doc

On the Bubble: The Big Easy

In the Press box: May Day, Chico, Skippy, La Bamba, Bulldog, Slim Jim, Hollywood, Beep

On the Injured Reserve: Rocky, Hurricane, Tunzie, The Rake

If you know you can’t play, let Stevo know right away. (He is in charge until Rocky is healed and able to take over)

On Tuesday February 20, 2018 Hockey starts at 6:30pm

IF YOU SEE THAT YOU ARE IN THE LINE UP AND YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO BE, PLEASE PLEASE PLESE TEXT STEVO.

Team colours for the tournament:
Chevy Green or Yellow
La Bamba Red
Cribzie Black
El Choppo White

Tomcats Forever !

By Tomcat Management

“If you are cooler than me, would that make me hotter than you”?

The early Bird might get the worm, but it’s the second mouse that gets the cheese.

Net Minders: Falcon & Terror
D Man: Chico El Choppo, Cribzie, The Rake, Spinner, Soupy, Chevy, Beep
Forwards: Sunny, Stevo, Killer, Snowpants, Bulldog, Tonto, Matador

We had the two goalies take the opening face off, that did not work out that well for Terror as they scored on the open net.

Razor was honoured at Tomcat hockey Tuesday night…with 1,645 games and a GAA Of .967 and 36 career shut outs. He brought a case of MGD…just because. Put her there Razor!

Honourable mention goes out to four Tomcats. Razor, for brining a 24 of MGD and he does not even play anymore. That is Tomcat Spirit. Snowpants for always being the one that puts away the sticks, the nets and the tables, it does not go unrecognized, Great Tomcat Spirit.  Chevy, for bringing out kielbasa last night with cheese and crackers and Jingles for bringing 24 instead of 12 on a night he couldn’t even play…Tomcat Spirit is alive and well! Thank you boys for your dedication to the Tomcats.

One more week before the tournament, if you know you are not playing next week, please let Stevo know now…

Tournament starts Saturday February 24, 2018 at 08:30hrs.

Cost is $20 and $10 for pizza. (Beer throughout the tournament is provided) You are allowed to drink anytime. Looking for volunteers to get to the Kapusta Kow Palace a bit early to set up, set up cooler with beer and ice, maybe shovel the fire escape if needed and last minute details that might be required by Doc and Kamikaze.

Big Turn Out Expected next week: Falcon, The Terror, Skuz, Spinner, Snowpants, Kamikaze, Stevo, The Rake, Jingles, Sheep Dog, Bulldog, The Turk, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, La Bamba, El Choppo, The Matador, Slim Jim, Tonto, Killer. Sparky, Doc, Hollywood, The Eagle and Tweetie Bird.

TOMCATS FOREVER !

By Tomcat Management

Beer Bringers: Spinner (24) Jingles (12)

Net Minders: Falcon, The Terror

In The Line Up: Cribzie, Spinner, Snowpants, Kamikaze, The Rake, Jingles, Bulldog, The Turk, Beep, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, El Choppo, The Matador, Tonto, Killer, Stevo.

On the Bubble:

In the Press box: May Day, Hollywood, Chico, Skippy, Doc, Scuz, Slim Jim, Sheep Dog, Sparky, LaBamba

On Injured Reserve: Rocky, Hurricane, Tunzie, Kamikaze

If you know you can’t play, let Stevo know right away. (He is in charge until Rocky is healed and able to take over)

On Tuesday February 13, 2018 Hockey starts at 6:30pm

IF YOU SEE THAT YOU ARE IN THE LINE UP AND YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO BE, PLEASE PLEASE PLESE TEXT STEVO.

Tomcats Forever !

By Tomcat Management

Net Minders: The Falcon The Terror
D Man: Kamikaze, Cribzie, The Rake, El Choppo, Sheep Dog, Sunny
Forwards: Stevo, Soupy, Slim Jim, Matador, Snowpants, Doc, Tonto, Chevy, Jingles

Hockey was lopsided in the beginning but after Jingles arrived, it was made all better.

Sunny made teams for the very first time and did a great job. “I am honoured, I really am, this is one of the best days of my life”, stated a weepy Sunny.

The Windsor Tomcat Hoodie is a popular clothing item this year with usually 7 out of 10 Tomcats wearing it on any given Tuesday …Tonto was the latest to purchase one … “These are fantastic clothing items that the Tomcats have…how can I go the rest of my life without a knock down gorgeous Tomcat Hoddie? I wear Hoodies all the time,” Tonto said after donning his.

If you are reading this on Wednesday February 7, the day after Tuesday night night, then did you know there are only 18 more days before the Tournament. The Tournament starts at 8:30 a.m.

The Schedule is as follows:

Home               Away
El Choppo Vs, Crbzie
La Bamba Vs. Chevy
Full Team Picture (Kamikaze to handle)
Cribzie Vs. La Bamba
Chevy Vs. El Choppo
Chevy Vs. Cribzie
La Bamba Vs. El Choppo

On the Injured Reserve Front, Doctors are optimistic that Hurricane will be able to play before the season is done. Tunzie on the other hand, we are being told, is on the shelf for the rest of the year. “We need to save a star studded player like Tunize for next year, so we are placing him on long term IR and he will not see any action this year, well maybe the golf tournament”, stated Head Coach Sea Lion.

HOCKEY REMINDER: After the February 24 tournament, there will be no hockey on the Tuesday February 27. Hockey will resume March 6. There will be 7 more weeks of hockey after the tournament. Last night of Hockey will be April 17. Tomcats would like to do something special food wise that night, any ideas, suggestions, text or see Rocky, The Rake and or Stevo.

Tomcats Forever !

by Tomcat Management

Beer Bringers: Chevy (24) Stevo (12) But we know he will bring a 24

Net Minders: Falcon, The Terror, Skuz

In The Line Up: Cribzie, Snowpants, Kamikaze, Stevo, The Rake, Jingles, Sheep Dog, The Turk, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, La Bamba, El Choppo, The Matador, Slim Jim, Tonto, Doc

On the Bubble: Killer

In the Press box: May Day, Hollywood, Sparky, Beep, Chico, Skippy, Bulldog, Spinner

On the Injured Reserve: Rocky, Hurricane, Tunzie

If you know you can’t play, let Stevo know right away. (He is in charge until Rocky is healed and able to take over)

On Tuesday February 6, 2018 Hockey starts at 6:30pm

Tomcats Forever !