The Tomcat algorithm finally woke up and did its thing. Game one was a thorough White-washing, 6-3. Game two flipped the script hard as Black roared back 8-4. Same floor, same guys, completely different movie. Two subs a side continues to feel like playing with a slightly shorter bench, but the boys still managed to start promptly at 6:35. Respect.
Snowpants was the clear TopCat of the night. Goals, assists, general chaos in the offensive zone—he was everywhere the ball wanted to be.
Special nod to Bender, who laced them up in net on a night he fully intended to take off. Solid citizen move. Rocky is out next week, so Soupy inherits the keys and the responsibility of keeping the group vaguely organized.
And once again, the room collectively yearned for the return of Sparky and the legendary Sparky Clock. The Chevy Clock has been a noble understudy, but nothing hits quite like the original. Bring back the Sparky Clock. Make Tomcat hockey feel like Tomcat hockey again.
Last night featured a first…Tomcat Entrance Music. Music played to introduce each player to the Tomcat fanbase.
Teams and Entrance Music by player:
Black
• Flower (Net) – “Flowers” by Miley Cyrus
(He’s in net. He’s blooming. The pucks are just expensive bouquets.)
• Soupy – “Soup” by Blind Melon
(It’s literally in the name. Also works as a warning when he starts dishing.)
• Snowpants – “Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!”
(The pants stay on. The points keep coming.)
• Big Ned – “Big Time” by Peter Gabriel
(Because subtlety has never been Ned’s brand.)
• Waldo – “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” by U2
(Classic. Where’s Waldo? Somewhere in the defensive zone, hopefully.)
• Rocky – “Eye of the Tiger”
(Mandatory. Non-negotiable. See you next week, champ.)
• Killer – “Killer Queen” by Queen
(Guaranteed to make at least one guy on the other bench sing along against his will.)
White
• Bender (Net) – “Bender’s Theme” (Futurama) / “Beer Barrel Polka”
(He showed up to tend goal on his night off. Absolute unit. Also, you know… Bender.)
• Sweets – “Sweet Child O’ Mine”
(Or “Sugar, Sugar” if we’re being honest about the hands.)
• Hobbs – “The Ballad of Hobbs & Shaw” (imaginary, but the energy is there)
(Fast, physical, and somehow always in the right place.)
• The Professor – “The Scientist” by Coldplay
(Overthinking the breakout, underthinking the dump-in. Classic Professor.)
• Bullwinkle – The Rocky & Bullwinkle theme
(Especially funny with actual Rocky on the other team. Fractured fairy tales in real time.)
• Chevy – “Chevy Van” by Sammy Johns
(The backup clock guy deserves the ultimate dad-rock entrance.)
• Animal – “Animal” by Def Leppard
(Or the Muppet Animal drum fill on loop. Either works. Chaos agent certified.)
Another classic Tomcat night in the books. Soupy’s running the show next week, Snowpants is still glowing from TopCat honors, and the Sparky Clock remains the most requested piece of missing equipment in the league. Same time, same place—try not to start late.
