Windsor Tomcats

Merry Christmas to all and to all A Tomcat Night By Harry Ballsonue

“Ho Ho Ho”

         Santa

Just a few last minute Tomcat items before Christmas, for now the Kapusta Kow sits empty.

Tournament…

Doc is looking for players for the tournament. Please let him know if you are able to

play. The Tournament is Saturday February 27, 2016.

Injury updates…. 

Shack: Is out 2-3 weeks with a lower body injury.

Rake: Out for the year, hoping to rehab and be back for 2016/17 season

Spanky: To be assessed by Doctors in the new year….possible return in February

Rocky: Out still for 4-6 weeks.

May Day: Out indefinably but looking at possible tournament play

Skippy: Out for the season with an upper body injury.

St. Felix….

Comes out January 1, 2016, please give it a gander when you are sitting back on the first day of January with a hang over.

First Night Back in 2016….

January 12 is our first night back, if you know you can’t make it, let Stevo know.

Rexy’s Tee Shirt Collection….

This week Noelle

Merry Christmas…..

To the fans, the coaches, the players and to the entire Tomcat Nation, Merry Christmas everyone and Happy New Year.

Under the mistletoe, can I put my Harry Ballsonue

Christmas Comes Early for 2 by Harry Ballsonue

“Now Dasher ! Now Dancer ! Now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall! Now Dash away!

Dash away! Dash away all! “

                                                  Clement Clarke Moore                                 

Teams

Sunny Sleighs Sunny, Shack, Tunzie, Matador, Sparky, Stevo, Spinner, Kamikaze and Jingles

Lovie Mistletoe Lovie, Razor, Beep, Hurricane, Soupy, Sheepdog, Chevy and Killer

Hockey was was action packed with the Lovie Mistletoe taking both games 9-7, and 7-6. Shout outs need to go out to Razor who played outstanding, to the grinders, Sheep Dog and Killer who notched a pile of goals and to the Matador, you snapped a few that made the mesh move.

One injury to speak of, was that Shack went down and was escorted off the ice, his injury is listed as a lower body injury and he is listed day to day. “If he had to play tomorrow, he probably could not play, but we are optimistic and will keep and eye on him and we hope to see him in the new year.” Coach Sea Lion indicated

Christmas Party afterwards at the Tomcat Club was a great deal of fun and everyone was all a smile, when the Tomcats Forever song was belted it out (YES !!! with hand gestures)

Hurricane with Coach Sea Lion

Great job by the Minister’s of Pizza The Turk and Zaba.  The boys devoured the pizza like there was no tomorrow.  “I noticed some tomatoes on one of the pizza’s” stated Lovie and then asked, “Is that something that is allowed”?

Seems like the Tomcats always know how to have fun.

Tomcats …Small, Medium and Large

Christmas came early for Tunzie and Kamikaze as they were given full time positions. “I got to tell you” (with large tears flowing down his cheeks) “This is the greatest day of my life”, said Kamikaze

Tunzie was speechless, all he could do when it was announced that he was now a full time Tomcat, was hug the Matador, they hugged for what seemed like 25 minutes and then smoked from their hookah pipe.  There will be more reports/information on the two of them getting announced as full timers in the February Issue of the St Felix, (Due out January 1…..only 17 days away) but it is believed to be due to Several Tomcats in limbo and with Bear Cat retiring and Junior leaving in a huff, that some room has been opened for additions to the Tomcat roster. Who will be next? Sheep Dog, Flintstone, Shack, The Danish, Green Giant ?

Two latest full time Tomcats ….Tunzie and the Kamikaze

“Every Moment Is A Teachable Moment”

Stevo

A wife in Edmonton stabbed her husband 40 times after tying him up.  He (Husband) was convinced he was being tied up for a sexual purpose, The positive thing about the event is that he did not have his dick severed.

Please have this be a moment of learning Tomcats, always ALWAYS have one hand free!

Sunny and Lovie were announced once again as the new assistant captains, who would go along with Hollywood and Sparky.

Newly named assistant captains for the Tomcat…Sunny and Lovie

Rocky gets mention as he brought a bottle of Crown Royal…..’Just Because’ he said.  The boys will work on it in the new year!

Week five is alive with Rex Albert’s tee shirts.

This week he brings you Candice.

Hockey starts back up January 12, 2016, have a great few weeks off everyone.

To the Players, and Coaches and Managers and fans and to everyone in the Tomcat Nation, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Tomcats Forever…Let’s have a Beer!

Do you think, while you are saying to yourself ‘now Prancer and Vixen and Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen’ that I could, this happy festive holiday season, put my Harry Ballsonue’.

Beer Bringers: Tomcats supply beer, rye, rum, (special drink for shots) and Pizza!

Net Minders: Razor, Shack

In The Line Up:  Chevy, Spinner, Sunny, Soupy, Killer, Hurricane, Matador, Jingles, Lovie, Beep, Kamikaze, Tunzie, Chico,  Stevo, Sparky, Sheep Dog

Not in the Line Up: Crow, Bulldog, La Bamba, Hollywood, Falcon, Green Giant, Turk, Cribizie, Sheep Dog, Flintstone, Doc

On I.R.: Rake, Spanky, Rocky, May Day, Snowpants

In the Press Box: N/A

In the Farm System: The Danish, Hicksee, Zaba, Mez

On I R In the Farm System: Skippy

Captains: TBD

Christmas Party and Last Night of Hockey: Tomcats Providing everything but the D.D. (So please make sure you have one)

First Night Back in 2016: January 12 

TOMCATS FOREVER

Three Ukrainian Captains… by Harry Ballsonue

“Last year we couldn’t win at home and we were losing on the road. My failure as a coach was that I couldn’t think of anyplace else to play.”             Harry Neale, professional hockey coach

Teams

Hollywood Borscht Hollywood, Beep, Green Giant, Stevo, Shack, Hurricane, Doc

Chevy Perohe Chevy, Sunny, Soupy, Razor, Chico, Flintstone, Sheep Dog

Sparky Kapusta Lovie, Snowpants, Cribzie, Turk, Jingles, the Danish

With the three Captains being Ukrainian, the team names became Ukrainian as well. “No one likes Putin” said one Captain, and added, “We are proud Ukrainians.”

It seemed to me, that the hockey was very good last night, good work by all the teams, no hacking, no wacking and no super intense play, just nice passes with some pretty goals.  Compliments  to the guys that played and to the three Captains that picked the teams.

Snowpants was injured early on in the first game on a play that he himself was responsible for, he fell to the ground and jammed his rib area,  He was helped off the the Kapusta Kow Floor and did not see anymore action on the night. “We are evaluating the situation on a hourly basis, to lose a player of Snowpants magnitude is never good.” stated head coach Sea Lion and added, “We will evaluate tomorrow morning and see where he is at, and yes, its an upper body injury.” Sea Lion concluded.

Snowpants suffered an upper body injury and Tomcat medical staff Doc came by to feel the ribs …” Only problem is his plan was to use two fingers and check from in my butt and up for the fractured ribs “.

Sunny and Chevy addressed the media after,

Sunny holds press conference ” my favourite porn is the casting couch ….I think the bang bus girls ….well that’s fake “.

Sunny is asked if his wife is a Unicorn …” Yes I can say she is, I’m a very fortunate fella and yes …we plan on participating in the upcoming HBO Series ‘Tomcat Wife’s'”.

Chevy held a press conference and told the media how he was lost “in a bush” one time in university .

Chevy’s press conference ….”don’t settle for a HJ …you’re a Tomcat for Goodness Sake “

Did you notice that they did not play the last game? I did, I asked Stevo about it, after. “we don’t have a rule about that, but personally I would like to see all the games played out, people pay their five dollars and deserve to get their five dollars worth.  It really has nothing to do where the Mini is at, it is more about the running and getting a good sweat going”.  Stevo had stated.

“Maybe we should get rid of the scores and standing all together”. suggested Cribzie.

What should happen is that Stevo or who ever is in charge on the night, should  say, ‘if these two teams do not want to play, is there anyone who does and anyone who does can play’.  The Tomcats  have enough black and white shirts and two sets of other shirts (one probably used that night) so that a game could still be played. “I think when the weather is hot the goalies sometimes ask for the night to end, sooner rather then later,  which I understand, totally,  but last night, it was cool out and the 6th game should have been  played.  I think it is something we can address at the year end Board of Directors meeting in May.” Stevo concluded.

A shout out goes to Sunny for bringing an array of extra beer in, “I had some odd and ends in the fridge, so I thought I would bring them in”, now that is a Captain and a leader, no wonder they made him an assistant Captain with the Tomcats.

Chrysler Connection….

December 15 is next week and it is the last night of Hockey for 2015.  Christmas Party downstairs in the Tomcat Club. All Tomcats and Alumni are invited.  Please drink responsibly and have a D.D. if you wish to have more then your usual.

First night back in 2016 is January 12, 2016.

Watch for ‘What the Tomcats know’ this Friday!

New Feature, now in it’s fourth week Rexy’s Tee Shirts

Ex Tomcat and now Assistant Coach Rex Albert has come across some tee shirts in his travels and is sharing them with the Tomcat Nation.

This week Samantha, ….

While you are taking in the Unicorn comment by Sunny and thinking, ‘hey is my wife a Unicorn’, do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue.

Beer Bringers: Chevy (24) Jingles (12)
Net Minders: Razor, Shack, the Danish
In The Line Up: Cribzie, Turk, Chevy, Sunny, Soupy, Killer, Hurricane, Snowpants, Jingles, Lovie, Beep, Kamikaze, Green Giant, Chico, Doc, Sheep Dog, Stevo, Beep, Sparky, Flintstone
Not in the Line Up: Crow, Bulldog, La Bamba, Falcon, Spinner, Tunzie, Matador
On I.R.: Rake, Spanky, Rocky, May Day
In the Press Box:
In the Farm System: Hicksee, Zaba, Mez

On I R In the Farm System: Skippy
Captains: TBD
Christmas Party and Last Night of Hockey: December 15, make sure you have a D.D. please !
First Night Back in 2016: January 12
Lost and Found: One of the Tomcats is looking for his Michigan Hockey Tee shirt, if you have it, or find it, please wash it and let Stevo know.

TOMCATS FOREVER

If Chico did not already have his nick name …he would now be called “the Bad Piñata”…”he looked like a watermelon tonight ” stated Jingles.

” what more can we do …we have Shirts, jackets, hoodies Toques…..so tonight we bought pizza “.

” I am having fun this year cuz hockey has been good . 5 more years as President …I don’t think so …but if Rocky is out for the year …then I can do one more year …if need be”

“…..no Doc …a Doc Brewin bobble head is not going to happen …but I like your idea Kamikaze about Hugh Hefner Robe or valour track suit “

Dr. E and the Falcon

President sitting with Vice Presidents wife Roxy….why does she look so worried and scared ?

 

Lady Katie and Kamikaze meet the Christmas Wrestling Giant …Ho Ho Arrrghhh !

New Feature, now in it’s third week Rexy’s Tee Shirts

Click here to read the January 2016 (214) issue of the Saint Felix

Beer Bringers: Doc (24) Sunny (12)

Net Minders: Razor, Falcon, Shack

In The Line Up:  Cribzie, Turk, Hollywood, Chevy, Spinner, Sunny, Soupy, Killer, Hurricane, Matador, Snowpants, Jingles, Lovie, Kamikaze, Green Giant, Tunzie, Chico, Doc, La Bamba, Stevo

Not in the Line Up: Crow, Bulldog, Sparky, Beep, Sheep Dog, May Day

On I.R.: Rake, Spanky, Rocky

Skinny: If everyone shows up that is on the list to play this week, we would have 3 teams and 4 spares aside….we shall see!

In the Press Box: Flintstone

In the Farm System: The Danish, Hicksee, Zaba, Mez

On I R In the Farm System: Skippy

Captains: TBD

Christmas Party and Last Night of Hockey: December 15.  Please make sure you have a designated driver for the ride home!

First Night Back in 2016: January 12 

Rocky’s daughters are raising funds for a very worthwhile charity…please bring some money to the Tomcat Christmas Party in order for you to assist in her cause as Rocky will be there and can take your order!

St. Felix Comes out December 1, please be sure to give it a gander.

TOMCATS FOREVER