Windsor Tomcats

We all know being part of the Tomcats involves having a nickname. It is part of the long tradition, as old as drinking beer on stage after hockey. Most guys get their nicknames on the very first night they play with the Tomcats. Some guys come in with some history of a nickname that carries over, while most get one from “first impressions.” What if, instead of getting a name when someone is relatively unknown to the Tomcats, we gave nicknames after many years of playing…would the names be different? For example:

Snowpants – given the name because his sweat pants with pads underneath resembled snow pants. Now having seen him play all these years and the countless slides across the floor (thus the need for padding), would he be The Slider?

The Turk – Owning the career blocked shot record by a landslide, would he be known as The Shocker (no Chevy, not that Shocker – a cross between the words “shot” and “blocker”)?

And speaking of Chevy, would he be better known as The Sniper for his well known shooting ability?

The Falcon is a great name, but doesn’t signifying the amount of shots stopped by this net-minding legend. Maybe The Wall is now more appropriate?

What if Stevo’s name was not Stephen? Would he be Billo or Bobo or Franko? How about The Watchmaker for his precision hands?

We all know Sparky is called so due to being an electrician. But having seen him dressed up wearing shades, is Pitbull more appropriate?

And what if Jingles (aka Kevin Kuprowski) never played his first night with keys in his pocket? Would his ability to be a shooter, passer, tough guy in the corners…kind of like a swiss army knife, give him the nickname K-swiss?

And poor Bullwinkle…just because he is Rocky’s pal, he is now forever known as a moose. But based on his ability to never stop moving (fast by the way) on the floor, should we call him The Perp (short for perpetual motion)?

And speaking of someone who never stops, wouldn’t Bulldog be better named Energizer or maybe even Greyhound instead?

Sunny’s name comes from his last name being similar to a word meaning “of the sun.” However, if there ever was a Greek God in today’s world, it’s Sunny so let’s just go with Zeus for his new nickname.

Finally, Lovie’s name makes sense since everybody, and I mean everybody, loves the guy. However, on the floor he is known to have the quickest release on the planet. As such, it may be more fitting to call him Zoloft (the PE drug).

Ah, who’s kidding…we don’t want to change any of these nicknames. You can’t alter the lore of Tomcat history…it wouldn’t be fair to our legions of fans.

Until next time,

Ivan Gerganov (guest columnist)