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Tomcats to build their own course in Essex

Posted by 81rocky on April 21, 2018
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By Harry Ballsonue and Dick Fitzwell
To Kick Off The Dirty Growler, Mr. Gordon, Tomcat Golf League DGMGTGL…we bring you this article.
Tomcats have bought the land, hired a contractor and have the design complete for the new Tomcat golf course. Along with the 18 hole golf course, which will be situated on a 480 acre site, there will be 1/2 acre lots for homes, there will be a community centre, a pool named after Jingles cuz he is a life guard and of course a luscious club house with a banquet facility. There will also be an Underground parking to keep your car cool in the hot summer months, indoor simulators for the winter months and a ping pong table . There will be 40 villas for out of town guests to ‘stay and play’ and a driving range along with tennis courts, full exercise gym and future plans have a new gym just for floor hockey. (No basketball nets)
Here are the holes, you as a Tomcat get first privilege to see the names of the holes and their intricacies.
Hole # 1, Par 5, 550 yards called THE RAKE: 20 sand traps, bring your rake in your bag, you will be needing it.
Hole # 2, Par 4, 440 yards called THE SUNNY: Depends on what time of day you tee off, the sun is in your eyes, don’t look up, you won’t see anything anyway.
Hole # 3, Par 4, 432 yards called THE CRIBZIE: It is a well dressed manicured par 4, very classy, very pristine.
Hole # 4, Par 3, 132 yards, called THE SNOWPANTS: It’s a short par 3.
Hole # 5, Par 5, 505 yards, called THE BUNDURA: You will have to negotiate water and sand in order to reach this very reachable par 5. But it is a deal waiting to happen.
Hole # 6, Par 4, 460 yards, called THE SEA LION : Put some Rye in your Belle River Pepsi and pray you don’t hit your tee shot in the the smelly growler.
Hole # 7, Par 3, 213 yards, called THE HOLLYWOOD: It is a long par 3, tough, so it may make you want to only play golf only once a year.
Hole # 8, Par 4, 398 yards, called THE RAZOR: You can get on the green in two easily, but the greens are Razor Fast so don’t over stroke.
Hole # 9, Par 5, 555 yards, called THE BULLDOG: It is a Bulldog of a hole, enough said.
Hole # 10, Par 4, 426 yards, called THE CHEVY: There is a lot of real estate on this Green, The green is huge, if you are too far away from the pin, you may need some helping hands.
Hole # 11, Par 5, 518 yards, called THE SOUPY: Marshland to the left, marshland to the right, keep it straight and keep it out of the soup.
Hole # 12, Par 3, 155 yards, called THE LA BAMBA: Music plays, but you don’t know where it is coming from, the music and the green are hidden, just look for the flag on the tee box.
Hole # 13, Par 4, 422 yards, called THE LOVIE: The prettiest, the nicest the most scenic and most beautiful hole on the course. it is lovely.
Hole # 14, Par 5, 535 yards, called THE SPARKY HOLE: It’s electric!
Hole # 15, Par 4, 390 yards, called THE SLIM JIM: It is a tight tight par 4, don’t try to kill it, keep it straight if you want to make it on the green in 2.
Hole # 16, Par 3, 181 yards, called THE ROCKY: Rocks surround this beautiful par 3, don’t over hit and don’t be short on the Rocky hole.
Hole # 17 Par 4, 413 yards, called THE MAY DAY: Lots of water on this hole, when you score an 8, you signal ‘May Day May Day, May Day’ as you step off the green.
Hole # 18, Pa 5, 591 yards, called THE KILLER: You can hack and wack your way to the green…but it’s a Killer.
“We are very excited to say the least”, indicated a beaming Rocky, President of the Tomcats, “This has been a long time coming, we have asked Razor to be our PGA Pro (that is why he took a year off hockey in order to get his Tour Card). The Terror’s landscaping company won the competitive bidding process thus eliminating overpriced Coco Paving and will oversee this massive project. The City of Windsor also submitted a bid to pave the cart paths. The executive was amused and felt the city should pave its own roads first. The Terror will pave the cart paths.
Tomcats Forever, in golf !

They Laughed, They Ate, They Cried

Posted by 81rocky on April 18, 2018
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By Harry Ballsonue
 
Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann:
“Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
 
Great hockey last night, at the Kapusta Kow with the Slim Jim Beans taking the tournament. They played the Kamikaze Kahlua in the final and beat them by one goal. “It certainly was an exciting night of hockey,” indicated Doc who notched a number of goals during the tournament. 
 
THE TEAMS:
Slim Jim Beans: Slim Jim, Skippy, Doc, Tonto, Matador, Jingles and Killer
Sheep Dog Southern Comfort: Sheep Dog, Falcon, Hollywood, Stevo, Rake, Sunny and Soupy 
Kamikaze Kahlua: Kamikaze, Terror, Bulldog, Skuz, Beep and Chevy.
 
“I cannot tell you how excited I am, picking my first tournament team and then having us win, this is just unbelievable, Pinch Me,” stated Slim Jim.
 
That is all for Tomcat Hockey for this year, Tomcats will are back September 2018.
 

The stage sits empty until September 2018

 
Board of Directors meeting isTuesday May 1, please let Rocky know if you are attending
 
Thanks to The Rake for taking the time to cook up a delightful pulled pork and slaw slider and for everything you do for the Tomcats.
 

This is what it is all about…enjoying a cold beverage with the best guys in the world…the Windsor Tomcats!

 
Quote of the night, as Matador is sitting on stage, with his balls hanging out, someone said, “Ive never seen balls that big’” to which Sunny replied, “No one likes the potato bigger than the steak.”  FUNNY !

Thanks to our goaltenders without them we would be no where…

 

Nothing like a photo of all Tomcat originals…been here for 29 seasons!

 
President Rocky bought a bottle of Crown for the boys to enjoy, put her there Rocky. That is leadership.

Friday June 2, the Turk is hosting the Kapusta Open, it is a four man scramble, played at Ambassador. Tickets for the golf game, dinner are only $110. The prize table is out of this world and so is the food. It is a fantastic event, it is a Saturday, come out and support the Turk in his golf outing.

Tomcat golf tournament is Friday June 15 at Sutton Creek. Tee off times will start 10 a.m.. Let Snowpants know that you are interested and he will try to assist you in the foursome that you want to play in. Cost and such being worked on, but you are looking at anywhere between $42-$45 dollars for golf and a cart.

Tomcat Jackets popular item on a night on the town…

Snowpants was scratched from the line up due to an injury, Snowpants and his manager felt they could not take a chance playing because the golf season was starting.
Some more interesting quotes from athletes:
 
 Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left winger, explaining why he keeps a colour photo of himself above his locker:

“That’s so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes.”

Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice:
“My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt. 

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player:
“I asked him, ‘Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?’
He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.'”

And in ending, fantastic season as always….

A MESSAGE FROM STEVO
 
Thanks to everyone for being so co-operative during these last few months with me running things again, with Rocky on the DL. Thanks to Sparky and all those who have helped with the beer empties, to Snowpants for always cleaning up at the end of the night (Sticks and clock).  thanks to Sunny for always getting their early and setting up, and to all those who helped him set up as well. And a special thank you to all those who played this year knowing that the NHL was not watching from on stage while you are playing, for those who come out for a short run and beer after, God Bless you and thanks for all you do.
I’ll add one more quote from an athlete , The basketball player was asked what his church preference was, and his answer was red brick. He also thought Taco Bell was the Mexican Telephone company.  
 
Tomcats should kick off their season opener with a team dinner at Taco Bell.
 
Hey, while you are sitting there and thinking of telling your significant other there is still one more week of hockey next Tuesday, do you think I can put my Harry Ballsonue.
TOMCATS FOREVER !

What the Tomcats Think They Know for the Final Night of the Season

Posted by 81rocky on April 15, 2018
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Beer Bringers: Tomcat Providing the beer

From The Rake’s Kitchen:  The Minister of Cuisine will be featuring a speciality sandwich with a side dish.

 
Net Mindgers: Falcon, Terror, Skippy
 
In The Line Up: Doc, Killer, Kamikaze, The Rake, Jingles, Bulldog, Beep, Sunny, Soupy, Chevy, La Bamba, El Choppo, Matador, Slim Jim, Tonto, Skuz, Stevo, Sparky, Spinner, Sheep Dog, Hollywood
 
Not In the Line up: AS IT SITS RIGHT NOW…. There are three (3) players that are questionable and will be getting back to Tomcat management about  being able to play on Tuesday they are; Cribzie, La Bamba and Chico.
 
In the Press Box: May Day, Cribzie, Chico
 
On the IR: Rocky, The Turk, Hurricane, Tunzie, Snowpants
 
Bad Axe: The Danish, Crow, The Big Easy, Eagle, Tweetie Bird, Lovie
 
Skinny: As It will be a mini, last night of hockey, hugs, kisses, lots of tears….you don’t want to miss it.
 
Dates To Remember: May 1, Board of Directors Meeting…..June 2, The Turks golf outing, $110 lots of fun, it is a four man scramble….. June 15 Tomcat Golf Outing…September 18 Hockey starts up.
 
Tomcats Forever!

One More Week to Go

Posted by 81rocky on April 11, 2018
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By Tomcat Management

Hockey was a bit chippy, guys need to remember that we are all friends and that if you hack someone or do something stupid, it only looks bad on you.  There is no reason for body work, there is no need for hacking and wacking.  Goalies were hacked a few times last night and some ‘pulling at the ball’ while the goalie has it will not be tolerated. They will be called out!

Soupy scored a goal with his head, that was allowed, but looking at the league rules, head Referee the Bundura indicated “it seems to me that if a player were to make a distinctive motion with their head directing the puck into the net, the goal would be disallowed. However, if the puck deflects off the player’s head, and there is no distinctive motion, it’s a good goal.” In the case of Soupy he used a distinctive motion to put the ball into the net with his head.
The league head office was contacted after the game, “Say for example there’s a shot from the point, the goaltender gets a piece of it sending it spinning up into the air in the scramble in the crease one player spots the dropping puck and uses his head to direct it over the line. Would this count as a goal or do the same rules apply to the head as do hands and feet, that you cannot intentionally direct the puck over the line with anything other than the stick,” said the League Spokesman.
 
The Last Night of hockey is next week, April 17, food night, make sure you come out for that night as Chef Rake will be making a speciality sandwich with a side dish, you really do not want to miss it.

Board of Directors meeting is Tuesday May 1, please let Rocky know if you are attending.

Friday June 2, the Turk is hosting the Kapusta Open, it is a four man scramble, played at Ambassador.  Tickets for the golf game, dinner are only $110. The prize table is out of this world and so is the food. It is a fantastic event, it is a Saturday, come out and support the Turk in his golf outing.

Tomcat golf tournament is Friday June 15 at Sutton Creek. Tee off times will start  at 10 a.m.. Let Snowpants know that you are interested and he will try to assist you in the foursome that you want to play in. Cost and such being worked on, but you are looking at anywhere between $42-$45 dollars for golf and a cart.

IF YOU CANNOT PLAY next week, why not shoot Stevo a text right now. As it stands now, there are 27 players playing.  That means 8 players per team and a goalie.  This what the Tomcat Organization knows right now, with the only question mark Cribzie and Chico….

Hockey starts at 6:30 Tuesday April 17. After that there is no more hockey till September.

For those wondering, Yes Skuz brought his beer last night.  Both he and the Matador will remain in the organization.
Thanks to those who helped put away all the tables at the start of the night.  Tomcat spirit was alive as everyone chipped in to help.

And in ending,  the Tomcat Members of Ghost Crossing would like to sincerely thank each and every Tomcat for coming out to the Lions Head to support the band.  “It really means a lot to us, from the bottom of our hearts, thanks so much for coming out, having a beer and cheering us on.  Thanks to the Tomcat Brothers and Sisters (Wives), just goes to show, that the Tomcat brotherhood is alive and well,” stated Stevo.

TOMCATS FOREVER!

What the Tomcats Think They Know…April 10, 2018

Posted by 81rocky on April 9, 2018
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Beer Bringers: Skuz 24 and a 12, (If he does not, both he and the Matador will be asked to leave the organization)

Net Minders: Falcon, Skippy

In The Line Up: Killer, Cribzie, Kamikaze, The Rake, Jingles, Bulldog, Beep, Soupy, Chevy, La Bamba, El Choppo, Matador, Slim Jim, Tonto, Skuz, Stevo

Possible New Call Up: Little John ( A friend of Doc’s works with Slim Jim) Not in line up, as we are right on the 18 mark. If one more person cancels, he will be called up.

Not In the Line up: Sheep Dog, Hollywood, Sparky, Spinner, Chico, Doc, Sunny, The Terror

In the Press Box: May Day

On the IR: Skippy, Rocky, The Turk, Hurricane, Tunzie, Snowpants

Bad Axe: The Danish, Crow, The Big Easy, Eagle, Tweetie Bird, Lovie

Skinny: Looks like 18 guys,,,so 2 teams

Dates To Remember: May 1, Board of Directors Meeting…..June 2, The Turks golf outing, $110 lots of fun, it is a four man scramble….. June 15 Tomcat Golf Outing…September 18 Hockey starts up.

Tomcats Forever!

Two weeks to go, What a Show!

Posted by 81rocky on April 4, 2018
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Good hockey last night, Matador and Snowpants with La Bamba and Cribzie, stole the show, with fancy passes…they were like Marner and Matthews, Rielly and Gardiner out there.

Soupy Sea Gulls did well too, countering with Chevy, Sparky and Bulldog.

Tomcats are getting Beep back next week, but The Turk, along with the Hurricane, Spinner, Rocky and Tunzie are done for the year.
The Last Night of hockey is April 17, food night, make sure you come out for that night as Chef Rake will be making a speciality sandwich with a side dish, you really do not want to miss it.

Some new roles and assignments were handed out last night.  Congratulations to Slim Jim and Sheep Dog for being given the most important role in the organization…the ‘Ice Men’.  Sparky chimed in with, “No one cares if the equipment is sub par, no one cares if the tables are set up to be boards, but don’t put ice on the beer, Tomcats will take notice.”

Turk remains Minister of Pizza, The Rake, is now the Minister of Cuisine. Doc and Kamikaze are co coordinators. To find out who is who, consider attending the year end Board of Directors meeting, when is it you ask?

Board of Directors meeting is Tuesday May 1, please let Rocky know if you are attending. It will be held at his house.

Friday June 2, the Turk is hosting the Kapusta Open, it is a four man scramble, played at Ambassador. Tickets for the golf game, dinner are only $110. The prize table is out of this world and so is the food. It is a fantastic event, it is a Saturday, come out and support the Turk in his golf outing.

Tomcat golf tournament is Friday June 15 at Sutton Creek. Tee off times will start t 10 a.m.. Let Snowpants know that you are interested and he will try to assist you in the foursome that you want to play in. Cost and such being worked on, but you are looking at anywhere between $42-$45 dollars for golf and a cart.

IF YOU CANNOT PLAY next week, why not shoot Stevo a text right now.

Hockey starts at 6:30 Tuesday, April 10. After that there is only April 17 left.

Skuz owes a case of beer from two weeks ago, Skuz has promised Stevo that he will bring his beer next week.

And in ending, Snowpants got a ball to the left eye last night, after missing two shifts he was back out there, “put her there,” stated Don Cherry, “Tough Canadian Boy,” he further added.

TOMCATS FOREVER !

What the Tomcats Think They Know…by Management

Posted by 81rocky on April 2, 2018
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BEER BRINGERS: Skuz 24 and a 12 from two weeks ago, Tomcats to provide the other 12

GOALIES: Terror, Skuz and ? (This is a crap shoot, one never knows) Maybe Stevo, Matador?

IN THE LINE UP: Doc, Killer, Cribzie, Snowpants, Stevo, Rake, Jingles ??, Bulldog, Sparky, Soupy, Chevy, La Bamba, El Choppo, Matador, Slim Jim, Tonto

NOT IN THE LINE UP: Kamikaze, Sunny, Hollywood, Sheep Dog, Spinner, Chico

ON THE IR: Rocky, Beep, Tunzie, Hurricane, The Turk, Skippy, Falcon

BAD AXE: The Danish

IN THE PRESS BOX: May Day

THE SKINNY: Right now,…..right now as it sits, we have 19 guys, one cancels, (looking for one) we would have 18 meaning just two teams…so if anyone needs the night off, let Stevo know…at the same time, if YOU ALREADY know you are not going to play, then let Stevo know.

ANNOUNCEMNETS: Last night of Hockey, April 17, it will be a food night.
May 1 is Tomcat Board Meeting if you plan to go…tell Rocky,
June 15 is Tomcat Golf Tournament, more details to follow.

POOL PARTIES: Rocky, Terror and Stevo all want to have a pool party this summer, but don’t want to step on each others pool sandals, so they will be looking at setting some dates in the very near future.

GHOST CROSSING: The members of Ghost Crossing would like to sincerely thank all the Tomcats that have come out to support us for the past two Wednesdays, we truly are thankful and are blessed to have the Tomcat brotherhood cheering us on. Thank You !

TOMCATS FOREVER !

Soupy Scores 14 Slim Jim 9 as Black Wins Both Games

Posted by 81rocky on March 28, 2018
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By Tomcat Management

 

Thanks to the boys, Soupy, Sheep Dog, Kamikaze, Doc and Sparky for brining out the beer empties. Special thanks to Sparky who takes them in and does the return.

Congratulations to Soupy on his first ever ‘Team Making”. Great Job Soupy. “When I was a young child man growing up in Petrolia, making subs and pizza and Gyros, I watched the Tomcats on TV on Tuesday nights, wishing praying, that one day I could be a Tomcat, now, not only do I play for them, I am making up teams, see kids, if you believe in yourself, believe in your dreams, anything can happen,” Stated a proud Soupy.

The Last Night of hockey is April 17, food night, make sure you come out for that night as Chef Rake will be making a speciality sandwich with a side dish, you really do not want to miss it.

Board of Directors meeting is Tuesday May 1, please let Rocky know if you are attending.

Friday June 2, the Turk is hosting the Kapusta Open, it is a four man scramble, played at Ambassador. Tickets for the golf game, dinner are only $110. The prize table is out of this world and so is the food. It is a fantastic event, it is a Saturday, come out and support the Turk in his golf outing.

Tomcat golf tournament is Friday June 15 at Sutton Creek. Tee off times will start t 10 a.m.. Let Snowpants know that you are interested and he will try to assist you in the foursome that you want to play in.
Cost and such being worked on, but you are looking at anywhere between $42-$45 dollars for golf and a cart.

IF YOU CANNOT PLAY next week, why not shoot Stevo a text right now.

Hockey starts at 6:30 Tuesday April 3. After that there is only April 10 and 17 left after that.

Skuz owes a case of beer from two weeks ago, Matador, who is the minister of Beverages and Ice, will be having a word with Mr. Skuz about brining his beer to hockey.

And in ending, Snowpants gets great credit for going downstairs and getting ice for the beer. The cooler sat for one game with no ice on it, then there was discussion about 15 minute periods or 17 for the second game, 17 was selected to which La Bamba said, “This way more time for the ice to chill the beer”. That my friend is management material.

Tomcats Forever!,

What the Tomcats Think They Know – March 27th

Posted by 81rocky on March 27, 2018
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Beer Bringers Jingles (24) Sparky (12)

Goalies: Hollywood, Falcon and TBD

In the Line up:  Sparky, Soupy, Cribzie, Bulldog, LaBamba, Matador, Tonto, Snowpants, Sheep Dog, Sunny, Jingles, Slim Jim, The Rake, El Chopo, Kamikaze, Doc, Stevo

Not In Line Up: May Day, Skippy, Chico, Killer, Chevy, The Turk, The Terror, Scuz

On the Injured Reserve: Beep, Hurricane, Rocky, Tunzie

NOTE: Sparky will be loading empties so looking for a few good men to arrive early (6:15) to help load his truck.  If you are not playing, please let Stevo know.

Wednesday – National Ghost Crossing Night – Lion’s Head – 7pm.  Be there to rock out with a band full of Tomcats.

BoD Meeting: This year’s BoD meeting is scheduled for May 1, 2018, 6:30pm at Rocky’s house.  This is open to any Tomcat wishing to take part.  Please let Rocky know by the last night of hockey (April 17th) if you will be taking part.

4 Weeks to Go…you’ll miss it when it’s done

Posted by 81rocky on March 21, 2018
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By Harry Ballsonue

No Hockey last night…cancellations and injuries leaving the Tomcat Board puzzled.  “Should we be ending hockey after the tournament,” asked Snowpants.

Sparky will need help rounding up the empties next week…volunteers can get there a little after six.

Last night of Hockey April 17….food night Chef Rake will be at his best.

Sutton Creek June 15 Tomcat Golf Book the day off today!

Ghost Crossing…some Tomcat brothers playing Lions Head Tonight 7-11 …you know they would support you if this was your band …you just know it ….

“We have given Tee Shirts away for years …all we are asking that people come out for a beer that’s all there is nothing to buy …no line up to stand in ….no mosh pit to get hurled at…just have a beer…dance and have fun”….Hollywood

What the Tomcats Think They Know…March 20

Posted by 81rocky on March 19, 2018
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Beer Bringers Kamikaze (24) The Turk (12)

Goalies: Hollywood & Stevo (battle of the brothers)

In the Line up:  Sparky, Soupy, Cribzie, Bulldog, LaBamba, Chevy, Doc, Matador, Killer, Tonto, Snowpants

Not In Line Up: Sheep Dog, May Day, Skippy, Chico, The Terror, The Falcon, Sunny, Jingles, Scuz, Slim Jim

On the Injured Reserve: Beep, Hurricane, Rocky, Tunzie, The Rake, El Chopo, The Turk

NOTE: Sparky will be loading empties so looking for a few good men to arrive early (6:15) to help load his truck.  If you are not playing, please let Stevo know.

BoD Meeting: This year’s BoD meeting is scheduled for May 1, 2018, 6:30pm at Rocky’s house.  This is open to any Tomcat wishing to take part.  Please let Rocky know by the last night of hockey (April 17th) if you will be taking part.