By Harry Ballsonue
“Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced unity one” A Question for the ages
June 15 the annual Tomcat Golf Tournament took place and Hicksee won with an easy 69. “It is an honour to win this tournament, I won two years ago and today, I get to bring the Pantolon de Neige Jug home for a year, love the Tomcats” Hicksee said weeping.
Last years champion hands the Pantelon de Neige Cup to this years champion Hicksee
“It is a fantastic tournament and I love playing in it, I look forward to this event every year” state Bagz.
Snowpants does a tremendous job organizing the event, but what is that spewing from his head?
Snowpants does a fantastic job, this year everyone had a swag bag on their golf cart seat and then after dinner he drew names and guys won different prizes. Special thanks go out to prize contributors. Kamikaze, Chevy, Ghost Crossing, Rocky and the Tomcats and Razor “I appreciate everything that is donated to me, and every golfer benefits from the generosity of the prize contributors”, stated Snowpants.
You can see the leader board and where players finished, Slim Jim, who was suppose to be at the tournament never showed up, when asked about it, he indicated, in full honesty that he forgot about the event all together. The Tomcat Golf Committee (the TGC) had a ruling in place and announced that Slim Jim would be fined a case of beer for his oversight and that he was is to bring the beer to a Tuesday night of hockey in either week, 2,3 or 4. “This is a PGA sanctioned event and we can’t have guys just forgetting about it”, stated a confused La Bamba, “How do you simply just forget about such a great and magnificent event”, La Bamba further added.
Non Tomcats are permitted to play and the field saw Tiny and Hatchie in the line up, “What a great bunch of fellows, I will come back every year, if they will have me”. Hatchie stated.
“It would be nice to see Hatchie come out and play on a Tuesday night “ quipped The Rake and added, “He appears to be Tomcat material”.
Hatchie who was going to organize a further 9 holes with everyone just wearing flip flops and bringing only 3 clubs was actually approached and asked if he was indeed going to organize an additional 9 holes. He was asked, “Are you not a member here”, to which Hatchie responded, “Member is a strong word, I play in a league here”. Hatchie stated and everyone at the table laughed. 9 additional holes were not played.
In a surprise golf announcement Snowpants stated that the Tomcat Golf Tournament event next year would be a 2 man scramble and that it would be held on a Saturday to which the crowd ooooed but excepted the new format. “Rocky the new President felt that it was time to change it up and make it something different, so next year a two man scramble will be the format”, stated Snowpants to the Tomcat golfers. He then spoke to the media after the awards ceremony during the dance, but had nothing further to add.
The format would be a two man scramble with the Ferranti Formula put in place, where (if 24 golfers were playing) 12 top golfers, on the day of the tournament would then select the bottom 12 golfers, from a hat, “You would not know who you were golfing with until the day of, how cool is that”, stated May Day.
Again, Kudo’s to Snowpants for a great great job, to St. Felix (Patron Saint of Floor Hockey) for making sure the weather was spectacular and to all the golfing participants.
And whilst you are thinking about why 11 is not pronounced onety one, think about this, if it’s true that we are here to help others then what exactly are the others here for? While thinking about these things do you think I could put my Harry Ballsonue.
Windsor Tomcats 