Windsor Tomcats

Unlike the Tomcats before me, I did not have any self-enlightening trips to Tibet or the corner of Wyandotte and Ouellette, although I hear from my neighbour, Junior Passion, that the women are spectacular in both. I, however, would like to further my cousin Sunny Salaris’ posting, and tell the story of the aforementioned hockey game pitting the Windsor Tomcats against the PTown Pig Farmers.

While on the 2-week stint in Petrolia, with Sunny and Lovie, I took it upon myself to spread word of the Windsor Tomcats and their great influence in the Windsor area. I had intended on decorating myself from head to toe with Tomcat swag, but I soon came to realize that my only items of clothing were a toque, and a Tomcats t-shirt. I asked Sunny and Lovie for their help in this matter, they quickly came to aide providing me with loads of Tomcat swag. Much to my dismay, Lovie provided me with a custom, Tomcats black lace thong with “TOMCATS FOREVER” on the front and a picture of Stevo’s face on the rear. He assured me it was not weird, and I was not about to question him, given his reputation on the Kapusta Kow floor. The Ptown locals were so impressed with my display of Tomcat swag; they set up a meeting with the town mayor, Pizza Pete. During this meeting, in the back room of Pete’s Pizzeria, with hardcore porn playing in the background, Pizza Pete asked the three of us, “who are these Tomcats you speak of?” Before I could answer, still wearing my Tomcats thong and t-shirt, Sunny jumped in, and to quote the legendary WWF wrestling crew D-Generation X, “Oh you didn’t know? Your ass better call somebody!” Pizza Pete didn’t want to call anybody, so the three of us just told him the story of the Windsor Tomcats. He was very impressed, so we went for a lap dance from the one armed town stripper Roxie Sweetcocker at the Squire Tavern. Oddly enough, Roxie was well aware of the Windsor Tomcats, mentioning that she had done a private show at their Christmas party years back. Given the thumbs up from Roxie, Pizza Pete proposed a challenge to the Windsor Tomcats, and here we are today.

Looking forward to the upcoming season!

Soupy

BTW – If you haven’t already, check out the Beer Schedule tab above to see when the Tomcats expect you to bring beer this coming season!