By Bloggy Bloggerstein
Tonight the Tomcats didn’t have enough for a mini tournament, but it took 18 minutes and 15 guys barking at Hollywood before it was decided. “I hope Stevo doesn’t miss many nights” said Holly, “these guys are fucking animals”.
Nicky stepped up and set the teams initially, lining up himself, Falcon, Soupy, Rock, Snowpants, Gretzky, Bossy and Lemieux…against Holly, Hann and Chevy with no goalie.
After a bit of adjustment the MLK-themed teams ended up:
White bread: Cribz, Hollywood, Snowpants, Shovey, Rake, Rocky and Junior.
Black panthers: May Day, Soupy, Boomba, Bulldog, Lovie, Killer, Turk and Hurricane.
Three goalies rotated, Falcon, Skippy and Danish.
Game one went to the vanilla crew 7-5 with Skippy beating Danish. Game two went to the dark side 7-3 with Falcon beating Skip for the win. The rubber match was a hotly contested match with some really good hockey. Behind the solid goaltending of the Falcon the Tighty Whiteys pulled out the rubber match 5-2. The Danish took the loss, but the talk was that he and Skippy were playing it low key to keep all their secrets for Sunday. “they’re sandbagging us” said Hurricane as he tucked his wallet neatly in Bulldog’s gym bag. “They will look like Roy and Tretiak Sunday”.
The 3 stars of the game as chosen by Boomba were Snowpants as third star, Bulldog as second star and Falcon as número uno.
Some highlights of the night included Turk going ballistic over the beer selection. “What in the blue fuck?” exclaimed George as he opened the cooler. “Molson 67? You gotta be fucking fooling me. I’d rather put a dick in my mouth before one of these, Christ. You can mess around with my pizza but don’t ever think about buying this ball sweat again”.
Another high point, literally, was Killer losing his stick which stood straight up. He was going full speed and pole vaulted on his stick which was jammed in his crotch. A strange,loud guttural noise was heard as he vaulted and everyone else stood in suspended animation watching. It was akin to the Nancy Kerrigan “why….why….whhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyy?” Killer ended up being ok and we all witnessed the most acrobatic maneuver ever performed on the Kapusta floor. Hollywood came a close second when he tried to jump the boards but forgot to lift his legs. He fell flat on his face with a thud and then jumped up claiming it was a stunt fall. Many players seemed unconvinced.
May Day did a great impression of an Inuit throwing a harpoon when he tossed his twig toward Hollywood, Bulldog and Snowpants looked like water bugs all over the ice and Boomba looked like a mid 80’s Coffey with his slick passing.
The only negative all night was a late news flash that Youngblood may possibly be out for the year. Whispers around the locker room suggested a professional Gilooly-like hit bankrolled by Killer due to the lack of veggies on the pizza while others suggested the NDP bashing may have put Andy off for good. Further updates will be passed on as they become known.
On a related note, it has been rumored that Shamus may be moving to Ottawa as a special assistant to the PM on a hockey subcommittee. This has not been verified, but updates will be relayed on this breaking story as well.
Also, Hollywood’s second career in music may be taking up too much of his Tomcat focus according to Stevo. “I don’t even know this guy anymore. He’s not the same guy I gave my campus crew sweatshirt to years ago. He may join Lovie on the review list if he is not careful. Below is a photo of Hollywood enjoying himself away from his Tomcat brethren…to be continued.
Windsor Tomcats 
Hey Bloggy, you asshole! You forgot to mention the Rake pulled a super solid by bringing some kielbasa and cheese. Attaboy Louis!
Lovie