Windsor Tomcats

…by Harry Ballsonue

A slight light rain at the start of the Tomcat golf outing did not panic the 20 golfers that set out to concur the course, everyone had a great round and most returned back to Mykel Jaworiwsky’s house for ‘Sovlaki night in Canada’….fun time had by all there, as well.

“A special honourable mention should be made to the organizer”, Chris Girard had said and then continued, “to Snowpants Ferranti, who did a great job keeping the tournament alive and on a roll and I can say, that everyone had a blast” Girard had said, with a smirk.

Snowpants, wanting to commemorate the event, set off a small fire work that panicked a three golfers who had a pace makers, two Vietnam Vets and the golf pro at the golf course, “What? Snowpants asked, they blow off fireworks at the end of Tiger game, I thought it would be fun to do the same at the Tomcat golf outing”. Ferranti had said, with a sheepish smile, as he was being led off the Seven Lakes property by security.

Chris Girard announced that the Tomcat golf outing, raised, 3.7 million dollars on the day, for ‘women who want larger breasts’.

“We will be able to help a lot of women throughout Canada, the U.S and the world with this money, so it is a great day for everyone”. Girard had said.

In the meantime, the Minister of Fireworks and Explosive Devices (and Golf), Snowpants Ferranti, is looking for a new site to play at next year’s golf event, “We are not welcome back here, and need to find a new place, we are looking at Woodland Hills in Belle River at this time, it is 9 – par 3 holes, but right now, it is the only place we can get on, even Tecumseh golf is not returning my phone calls, to see if we can play mini putt”. Snowpants Ferranti had said.

“There are no pants, like Snowpants” Mykel Jaworiwsky had said.

Tomcats want to thank Mike, Diane and Tess for hosting the party and for a great poster that Tess had made, welcoming the Windsor Tomcats.

That is it, for Tomcat events for the 2010-2011 season, I don’t know what I am going to do with myself.  Season Starts back up on September 20, 2011 and I will write an article or two in August for the start of the season, but for now, I wish everyone the best and safest summer season!

If I see you laying on the beach tanning yourself, I will put my Harry Ballsonue, on your  forehead and belly.